Anko Plus Gennin Equals: Pure Chaos!
by Shashuko the Paisley Maiden
Summary: Mitarashi Anko: crazy lady, crazy former pupil of Orochimaru, and now crazy teacher of three crazy kunoichi. What will happen to these girls, who are all very creepy in their own way? Will they become even crazier than Anko herself? Read to find out!
1. Chapter 1

Shashuko: Wheeee! First ever Naruto ficcy! I hope this doesn't completely suck. I also hope you poor people who got here because I write Ouran ficcies don't completely hate me for this... lol. The OC's here are all based off of people from my real life. Therefore, for the pure purpose of torturing my friends, I have lots of evil ideas for this ficcy.

Sasuke: using sharingan to see shashuko's evil plans HELL NO. YOU WILL NOT WRITE THAT.

Shashuko: Well, if you put it that way Sasu-teme I'll have to. By the way, if I owned Naruto, these OCs would not be in it anyway, but Sasunaru would be cannon.

Naruto: It IS cannon dattebayou! We kissed.

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A full class of gennin hopefuls filed into the classroom.

"Okay, we waited, Iruka-sensei! Who're our teachers?" yelled a boy with pure white, chin-length hair from the back of the classroom. He was wearing a plain brown shirt with

A tall girl in the front rolled her eyes. "Iruka-sensei is our teacher, smart one!" her blonde hair was held back by her hitai-ate (worn like a hair band, but without some left hanging in the front like Sakura) and she was wearing a light purple shirt with spandex shorts that were, pointedly, the same color as the dark blue band on her hitai-ate.

"Nice," commented the dark-haired girl sitting next to her, giving the blonde girl a high-five. Her big-neckbanded shirt and shorts were both black.The huge samoyed breed dog standing next to the girl barked in agreement.

"WARAI KIIRO! YOU'VE GOT SOME NERVE TALKING IN CLASS WHEN YOU'RE SITTING IN THE FRONT ROW!!!" Iruka screamed.

"Sensei, gomen nasai. Please forgive me?" Kiiro asked.

"NO! AND AS FOR YOU, KUROPPI, HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU I HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO BRING THAT DOG IN?!?"

The girl sitting next to Kiiro smirked. "This is the last time you'll have to tell me, sensei. Soon, I won't be a part of this class anymore."

"Nice," whispered Kiiro. She and Kuroppi high-fived again.

"Thank goodness for that," Iruka sighed. "Anyway, the sensei for Team 1 is---"

A mass of cloth crashes through the window. Then, there was an explosion. When the smoke cleared, there was a lady standing in front of Iruka's desk with a sheet behind her that said, 'Mitarashi Anko-- Jounin Sensei for Team 4.'

"I'm Mitarashi Anko and I'm the sensei for Team Four! Iruka, there's a lot of maggots in here. Which ones are mine?"

"Th-those three," stuttered Iruka, pointing to Kiiro, Kuroppi, and the person sitting next to them. This person had sort black hair parted to the side and oval glasses. They was wearing a long-sleeved red Chinese shirt with black leggings underneath. The person's skin was pale and the person's eyes were golden. "T-Team Four, take your sensei and _leave_."

"Oh no, is the great teacher Iruka _scared?_" taunted Anko, sneaking up behind Iruka and putting a kunai to this throat as her three new gennin walked down to meet her.

"I like you already, sensei," chuckled Kiiro. "I'm Warai Kiiro, this is my friend Inuzuka Kuroppi-chan, whose nickname is Kuro-chan, with her dog Fuyu, and this is Hebitsukai Kon-kun! Kon-kun had the nickname 'Ouji-sama' from me because of extreme princeliness."

Anko looked at Kon, and then glared daggers at Iruka, pressing the one at his throat ever so slightly.

"Iruka, I said I would only take girls."

Kon glared ar Anko. "I _am_ a girl."

There was silence for a moment, and then Anko and Kiiro both started laughing like hyenas.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" guffawed Kiiro. "I'm stuck with an Inuzuka who looks like an Uchiha, a girl who looks like a boy, a dog the size of a wolf, and a new sensei who scares the crap out my old one! This'll be _fun!_"

"I don't look like an Uchiha," said Kuroppi darkly, giving Kiiro what looked suspiciously like the famous Uchiha glare.

Iruka sweatdropped. _'No, she looks exactly like Sasuke...' _he thought. "Anyway, why don't you guys go now?" the brown-haired chuunin asked nervously. _'The sooner Anko leaves, the better.' _

"Okay, maggots, let's go!" shouted Anko, dragging her three charges after her.

Iruka let out a breath he'd been holding since Anko crashed through the window.

"As I was saying, the Jounin sensei for Team 1 is..." he started, as if nothing had happened.

"Iruka-sensei, are you bipolar?" Kiiro's yell was heard.

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Team 4 were all sitting in a dango shop.

"Well, you know my name, and I know your names. So now, tell me more about yourselves."

"I'm Kiiro!" said Kiiro (no duh). "I'm pretty spacey, but someday I'm gonna be a great Sannin like Godaime-sama! I like good food, my friends, and my little sisters, but my brother not so much. He annoys me. But I haven't seen 'em in awhile because I ran away from home to join the Academy. Haven't seen 'em since."

"I see... okay! You! Girl-who-looks-like-a-boy! You go!"

"My name's Kon. I live by myself, since no one adopted me before I joined the Academy. Kiiro calls me Ouji-sama after an incident that happened with a younger girl thinking I was a boy," she said.

"Interesting... so, you don't know your family at all?" Anko, angry for some reason. "Are you _sure?"_

"I'm sure," Kon said, "Why?" she asked curiously.

"No reason," Anko said, suddenly cheerful again. "How about you, Sasuke-look-alike?"

"Kuroppi or Kuro-chan. _Don't call me 'Sasuke-look-alike_'," Kuroppi replied darkly.

"She gets that a lot," Kiiro chuckled.

"Don't remind me," sighed Kuroppi.

"Well, I'm Mitarashi Anko! I like eating dango, scaring people, and the screams of pain that come from the people I fight."

"_I think we'll get along just fine, then_," said Kon eerily, half joking.

"Anyway! We're going to have a test tomorrow."

"A test? But we already took a test!" whined Kiiro. "What's this test for?"

"To see who becomes gennin," Anko replied. "You see, the test you took in the academy was only to find out who would be qualified to become gennin. The real test has a 66 dropout rate and, our of the 27 students who graduated from your class, only nine gennin will pass."

"WHAT?!?" yelled Kiiro.

"Yep. Kiba-niisan was telling you about this the other day, remember?" Kuroppi pointed out. "Weren't you listening?"

"Kuro-chan, I _never _listen to anything your brother says. You know that." Kiiro noticed Kuroppi's expression. "Well, you know now anyway."

All four kunoichi started laughing.

When the laughter died down, Anko gave them their instructions. "Okay, meet me at Training Ground 5 tomorrow at 7 AM. Don't eat breakfast! You'll barf."

"Okay then. Is that all, sensei?" Kon asked.

"Yeah, except one thing. Why don't you ever talk?"

"I'm trying to figure you out. We'll be fighting you tomorrow, won't we?"

"WHAT? Fighting a Jounin? I'm doomed..." Kiiro moaned.

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The next morning, all three (plus fuyu makes four) met at 7 AM in the decided spot. Unlike some worthless senseis, _Anko_ was on time.

"Okay!" she yelled excitedly. "Here's the plan, maggots! I have these two bells here." she held up two bells and waved them around, making them make tinkly noises.

"How can she be such a morning person?" moaned Kon.

"Practice, lots of practice, take it from me," Kiiro replied cheerfully.

"I hate morning people," Kuro said under her breath.

"Here's how it goes!" continued Anko. "You all have to try to get these bells, which by the way you won't be able to do without wanting to kill me. In addition, if you don't get a bell, you'll be tied to a post while you watch the others eat the bento boxes I made. It might be only one of you, or _all three!_" Anko beamed at the prospect.

"Is that why you told us not to eat breakfast?" Kiiro asked curiously.

"No, you really _might_ barf if you ate ate breakfast," Anko replied evilly.

"I'm scared now..." decided Kiiro.

"Okay! You have 'till 12 and the time starts now!" Anko whizzed off.

"Okay, huddle!" whispered Kiiro. "Remember how she said only nine would pass out of the twenty-seven?"

"Duh," said Kuroppi.

"Well, I think the two that get the bells have to fight each other," said Kiiro worriedly, "And I don't want to fight either of you! You're freaking scary! So, here's the plan: I play the fool and distract Anko-sensei with my idiocy, while you two get the bells! No one gets hurt! No wait... I take that back."

"Okay. Go find Anko, and be loud about it. We'll follow behind," said Kon.

Kiiro ran off in the direction that Anko had left in.

Anko was sitting in a tree, eating dango.

"Wonder if they'll find me... I bet they're worried I'll attack them, shaking in their boots. Heh heh..." she sent the now-empty dango stick flying towards the tree like a senbon.

"Ah hah! There you are, Anko-sensei!" yelled Kiiro, looking up. "She must be in that tree somewhere," she said to herself. "Okay, let's go!" she jumped up.

"Ohh Seeeenseeeei!" she called.

Anko was sitting on a branch, lazily twirling a kunai in her hands. "I was wondering when you were going to get here. Where are the other two?"

"Who cares? Fight me!" Kiiro supplied, charging ahead. Anko sent her flying into a tree. Kiiro got up shakily and threw a kunai at Anko, missing badly.

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Meanwhile, Kuroppi, Fuyu, and Kon were all hiding in a tree nearby when Kiiro's kunai whizzed past them and nearly hit Fuyu's head.

"Why is her aim always so bad?" Kuroppi moaned.

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"Your aim sucks, brat!" Anko yelled.

"Oh rub it in, why don't you?" Kiiro yelled back sarcastically.

"You aim sucks! Your aim sucks your aim sucks you aim sucks your aim-"

"I take that back," Kiiro growled, throwing a kunai and three shuriken. None of these hit near Fuyu, Kuroppi, or Kon, but unfortunately, none of them hit Anko either. Kiiro, who was worrying about when her team mates would get there, decided that she wasn't causing enough of a distraction and finally threw herself.

Now, she wouldn't have missed this one, but Anko had decided to dodge for some reason.

"Ninja skill number one: taijustu. Or did you forget, brat?" Anko taunted.

"Forgotten taijutsu? Me? I have forgotten many things on the road of life, but that isn't one of them," said Kiiro good-natured-ly, taking a stance on a branch.

"Are you sure?" asked Anko.

"Pretty sure," noted Kiiro, throwing a punch, which Anko caught.

"I have your arm now," chuckled Anko, "So I can do anything to it I want to right now. I could stab it with a kunai, I could drag shuriken through it, I could squeeze it so it loses circulation, I could twist it..."

Kiiro muttered something about crazy senseis under her breath and tried to kick Anko in the shin, but her foot was blocked by Anko's own.

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"Now," whispered Kon.

Kuroppi and Fuyu nodded.

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Anko was blocking Kiiro, who was trying everything from stabbing Anko with a kunai to punching her in the stomach. Kiiro was getting tired, but Anko was wondering why at times like this she didn't take a leaf out of Kakashi's book and read while fighting.

While Anko stood there, boredly blocking Kiiro's attacks, she felt a tug at her side.

"What--?"

There was a large white dog running away with bells in its mouth.

"Wasn't that the Sasuke-look-alike's dog?" Anko asked.

Kon and Kuroppi came out from behind the tree they'd been hiding behind, each holding a bell.

"We win," the said, grinning.

"What?!?" Anko yelled.

"Wow, I thought you'd notice us at least a little," Kuro said. "Are you really that spacey?"

"I was too busy insulting Kiiro..." Anko mumbled.

"That's good," said Kiiro. "I hoped to get as much of your attention as I could so Kuro-chan and Ouji-sama could get the bells. How'd you find Anko-sensei, guys? Didja just follow me?"

"When I want to find someone I can smell their blood in the air," Kon said.

"Really?" Anko gasped.

"No, not really," replied the black-haired girl. "But I am good at finding people. Call it luck, I guess."

"While I was distracting you, Kuro-chan and Ouji-sama snuck up from behind and Fuyu stole the bells!" giggled Kiiro.

Anko hit Kiiro on the head. "I know that now, you idiot!"

"OW! That's me, always stating the obvious," Kiiro groaned, rubbing her head. "Oh, well, I bet this was good for chakra building."

"Chakra building? What for?"

"The summoning justu takes a lot of chakra," explained Kon.

"How would you know?" Anko growled.

"She read it in a book, and told us that's why she was constantly hitting that post n training area 26," Kon sighed. "How else?"

"Oh," said Anko.

"So, sensei, what happens now? Who passes?" Kiiro asked excitedly.

"All of you pass."

"... WHAT!?!" yelled the three new gennin (fuyu just barked in confusion).

"Really, Anko-sensei?" Kiiro asked. "But- but how?"

"This is really test on teamwork, to see how much of it you have," Anko explained. "Now! Kiiro gets tied to the pole, since she didn't get a bell!"

"Ahhhh!" whined Kiiro.

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"Don't feed her," taunted Anko. When she'd asked Kakashi on the details of this test, he'd said that this was supposed to be part of the test as well, but she thought that it was pointless. The idea of tying someone who hadn't to a pole and eating in front of them, however, was still very appealing to her.

"What, aren't you hungry? Why don't you eat?" Anko asked in a mock-innocent voice.

"I have a packed lunch in my back pocket, but I can't reach it," Kiiro muttered. "Would you please untie me?"

"I would, but your tortured expression is hilarious," Anko replied.

"So you would, but you won't?"

"Yup!"

"Dang! And that dango shop is having ladies' night, too. Oh no wait, the ladies' night thingy only applies to alcohol. But still! The whole concept of ladies' night is cool! And last time I got a free pearl drink out of it too," Kiiro muttered.

"Which dango shop? Where?" Anko asked suddenly, in a very, very frightening tone of voice.

"It's called Dango Hoshakugi. It's a block from my apartment, so I usually eat breakfast there when I'm too lazy to make my own," said Kiiro. "I know all the workers! It's really cool! I even have a 'usual' I can ask for, 'The usual please' and it's so cool to be able to say that!"

"... Okay..." said Kuroppi. "You're weird."

"Thank you!" the idiot blonde replied.

Just then, Yamanaka Ino and Haruno Sakura ran into the clearing.

"SASUKE-KUUUUN!" they yelled, running up to hug Kuroppi.

"I'm. _Not_. Sasuke," replied Kuroppi, using Kawarimi (substitution) to escape their grasp.

"HEY! Why are we hugging this blonde girl?"

"Because she used Kawarimi on you idiots," explained Kiiro, somehow managing to escape the fangirls' grasp. "And she isn't Sasuke. Her name's Inuzuka Kuroppi. Who told you she was Sasuke anyway?"

"Kiba," said Sakura, eyes ablaze, "I'm going to kill him."

"No, I'm going to kill my nii-san first," Kuroppi said darkly.

"Are you SURE you're not Sasuke?" Ino asked suspiciously.

"Yes," replied the dark-haired girl gruffly, giving a glare that was almost an exact replica of Sasuke's.

"SHE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE HIM, THOUGH!!!" shouted the scary fangirls.

"Let's dress her up like Sasuke and drag her around town!" Ino said excitedly.

"Good idea!" said Sakura.

Kuroppi glared at them. Unfortunately, this was the same Sasuke-ish glare used earlier, so they just hugged her again.

"YOU'RE SO CUTE!!!" They squealed. Kiiro's response was to crack up.

"Help," yelped Kuroppi, gasping for air.

"Nah, this is too much fun," decided Anko.

"Oh, c'mon, we should help her out a little at least," Kiiro chuckled. "Ouji-sama, do you have any spare cloth on you?"

"What?" Kon asked.

"Ya know, bandages or anything?" Kiiro grinned.

"Um, I think I've got some gauze, why?"

"And senbon?"

"Sure, why?"

"Lets me see some and you'll find out."

"Okay... here." Kon gave Kiiro some cloth bandages and senbon.

"Heheh..." and with that, Kiiro unraveled part of one of the bandages, tying the resulting thread to the end of the senbon. Then, she got to work sewing. Two minutes later, she had two small white charms hanging from braided loops.

"Yamanaka-sempai, Haruno-sempai!" said Kiiro cheerfully. "Look what I have!"

The charms were both replicas of Sasuke's head.

"GIVE ME THOSE!!!" yelled both creepy fangirls at the same time, grabbing at Kiiro's hands. This gave Kuroppi time to escape, so she ran, Fuyu following her right at her heels.

"It'll cost ya," giggled Kiiro. "How much do ya two got on ya right now?"

"I HAVE TWO HUNDRED RYOU!" screamed Ino.

"I HAVE THREE HUNDRED!" screamed Sakura.

"Well then, these babies sell for two hundred and fifty. SO, both of you fork over the cash."

"WHAT? I'm not gonna pay to help give Ino-pig one of those Sasuke keychains!" Sakura gasped.

"Well, then, rude are we? Maybe I'll sell them to someone else." Kiiro walked away, jerking her Sasuke heads as she walked away.

"WAIT! WE'LL PAY!!!" Ino and Sakura ran after Kiiro, shoved the cash into her mouth, and took the keychains.

"When did you get so fast with your hands?" asked Kon, picking her discarded senbon off of the ground.

"Let's just say I should've been working on my Taijutsu, Genjutsu and shuriken/kunai throwing, but I'm stupid enough to be proud of myself anyway!" Kiiro replied, spitting 500 ryou out of her mouth. "Now, who's hungry? I've got five hundred extra so I'm buying! But we gotta find Kuro-chan first... oh! I bet she's at her house!"

(later)

"Thish ish the best dango I've ever tashted!" Anko said hyperishly, waving her half-off (half-full) bottle of sake around (lady's night, remember?).

"Anko-sensei, I'm not paying for drinks," Kiiro said cheerfully. "Since I don't believe in alcohol."

"YOU MUSHT BELIEVE!" Anko slurred. "YOU MUSHT BELIEVE!"

"I believe you're drunk, Anko-sensei."

"Don't be _shilly!_ I've only had three bottlesh!"


	2. The Fanboys of Team Four

Shashuko: w00t! chappy two!

Sasuke: sarcastic greeeeat, just what we need.

Shashuko: Well, This chapter is solely dedicated to the torture and estrangement of my dear friend kuro-chan. even though I haven't tortured kon-chan nearly enough. but i have many, many evil plans for this... kukuku.

Sasuke: Please don't laugh like that. It makes my brain hurt.

Shashuko: blows rasberry fine then. by the way, I don't own naruto...

Naruto: But she has an Akatsuki cloak. DEIDARA'S BACK FROM THE DEAD!

Shashuko: Stfu. I don't look that much like him. blonde hair is parted to the side and loves explosions

Sasuke, Naruto: Yes you do.

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Kiiro, Kuroppi, Kon, and Fuyu stood in Training Ground Five, the two non-blonde girls yawning sleepily.

"Where's Anko-sensei?" Kon asked no one in particular. "She's three hourse late!"

"She's probably hung-over from last night!" Kiiro said jokingly. "She had, like, five extra-large bottles of sake! Serves her right."

Kuroppi and Fuyu nodded in unison.

"Yo!" came a voice from behind them. "Anko-san is hung over so I'm going to be taking over for today!"

"Then why are you so LATE?" Kuroppi yelled.

A silver-haired man walked towards them, one eye closed happily and the other covered (making him techinically blind O.O) "Well, I was going to come earlier, but I as held up by a previous student of mine, who yelled at me for two hours because I was already late. Then I got lost and had to ask Iruka for directions, but he didn't know where we were either. So, we tried to find ourselves together-"

"That sounds wrong," Kiiro interrupted.

"Shut up. Anyway--"

"I don't care why you're late, but can we get to work?" Kiiro interrupted again. "I want to get to work!!!"

"Don't get your hopes up," Kon drawled. "We'll get sucky missions for a long time."

"I know that! Kiba told me too," Kiiro said. "But I don't think we're really gonna be scribbing sewer walls, are we?"

"If we're lucky," Kakashi said cheerfully, opening his eyes for the first time. "SASUKE!!! You're back?"

"NO. I'm. Not. Sasuke." Kuroppi said from the back of her throat. "I'm. Not. Even. An. Uchiha."

"She's Inuzuka Kuroppi! And her big brother is _Kibaka_, not Uchitachi. Who in non-Kiiro-speak are Inuzuka Kiba and Uchiha Itachi," Kiiro added. "The dog is Fuyu and it's hers."

"Oh. Then why don't you have the Inuzuka fangs on your face?" the man asked curiously.

"I was adopted," Kuroppi said with finality, clearly not wanting to talk about it.

"So, maybe you ARE an Uchiha. You could be Sasuke's twin for all we know!" Kiiro crowed.

"Shut. Up." Kuroppi muttered. _'First, Anko is late. Then, THIS idiot shows up. Can this day get any worse?'_

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"Phew," Kiiro said, "That's the last of 'em." she put the chicken she was holding into the coop.

"What I don't get is why people can't just catch their chickens themselves," Kon sighed, shaking her head.

"Maybe they're lazy," suggested Kiiro.

"More likely they've done it before and are sick and tied of catching them," decided Kuroppi, sitting down on a log. Fuyu came up to her and asked her something in dog language. It sounded like this: pant pant "Arf-arf-BARK-arf?" followed by the pleased sicking out of Fuyu's tongue and a doggy grin.

"No, Fuyu, you can't eat one," Kuroppi sighed. "They're not our chickens."

Fuyu whined.

"Whenever I reach my hands out to the chickens, they get scared," Kiiro giggled. "What do they think I'm gonna do, blow 'em up?"

"You can never tell with chickens," Kakashi said lazily, turning the page of his novel.

"HOLY CRAP!!! You're reading Icha Icha Paradise?!?" Kiiro yelled.

"Yes, I am. Is that a problem?"

"Are you TRYING to disrupt our innocence? We're just kids, and I don't know about the other two, but _I'M_ very impressionable. What if just because you do, we all start reading those books? That'd be BAD!" said Kiiro self-righteously.

"Very bad indeed," said a voice from the trees.

"Who's there? Another pervert?" Kiiro yelled.

"No!" a green blur flew out of the tree and faced Kakashi, and then said, "by reading those books in front of students, even ones that aren't your own, you are DISRUPTING THEIR YOUTH! HOW CAN YOU?!?"

The man was wearing a green jumpsuit with orange leg warmers, sporting a black bowl cut and Huge Eyebrows.

"Kakashi, I know you are my eternal rival, but this is too much! I challenge you to... a PIE-EATING contest! Because we haven't done that yet and my mother dumped a bunch of pies on me the other day!"

"I guessed you might live with your mother," Kuroppi said, causing her team mates to start laughing.

"A pie-eating contest, huh? Sound interesting..." Kakashi looked up thoughtfully. "Hmm..."

"PIE! Oh! Oh! Can I compete too?" Kiiro asked enthusiastically. "That sounds like a worthwhile competition!"

"Who are you, oh enthusiastic youth?" questioned the bowl-cutted man.

"My name's Warai Kiiro!" she said hyperishly, slightly scaring Kakashi.

"Warai?" the strange and most likely gay man in the jumpsuit stared at her. "Are you sure...?"

"Yup! My Mama was Warai Mamoka, the Frypan Princess! Yup, Warai, that's-my-last-name-don't-wea-it-out!" she grinned hugely (read: creepily). "Kiiro sounds much cuter!"

"... I'm Konoha's beautiful green beast, Maito Gai! I think I like you, Kiiro-san. You are very youthful!"

Kiiro used her biggest, creepiest smile. "Why aren't you scared? Usually when I grin at people this much they stares and walk away, very slowly. Shoud I be creepier?"

"No, Kiiro, you'll give him a heart attack," teased Kuroppi. "Arf!" Fuyu added.

"No, Youthful Kiiro-san, I don't find you creepy in the slightest! In fact, I find your enthusiasm very refreshing, like that of my student, Rock Lee's!"

"You mean my neighbor, your Mini-me?" Kon asked, sweatdropping. "I can see why _you_ would like him..."

"Let me guess. He's worse?" Kiiro asked, pointing a Gai. "Then this guy?"

"No, he's exactly the same," Kon said. "Who wouldn't like a person exactly like themself?"

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"Well, kids, Anko is probably over her hangover by now, so I'm done. Ja! I'm going to go read Icha Icha some more." Kakashi's image blurred out and dissappeared.

"HEY! He just left three minors all alone without adult supervision..." Kiiro yelled. She stuck out her tongue at the spt where Kakashi had been standing a minute before. "Stupid Hatakashi!"

"Let me guess: you don't know your way home." Kuroppi smirked.

"Well... yes," Kiiro admitted sheepishly, then laughed half-heartedly, "Ha ha! I'm such an idiot..."

"Yes, you are," Kuroppi said darkly.

"Thank you!" Kiiro replied cheerily. There was a rustling in the bushes behind them.

Kon sighed. "Kuroppi, they found you."

Kuroppi turned around veeery slowly to face... a huge group of boys.

"What?" she asked, clearly more than a little annoyed.

"Kuro-sama!" They all yelled. "Were were you?!? We were all so worried!!!"

"I was on missions with my Gennin Team. What else?"

"Wow, fan people sure are stupid," Kiiro noted (_Kiiro_ thinks they're stupid. _Kiiro. _And we all know how stupid Kiiro is by now, right? that makes fan people very, very stupid).

"WE MISSED YOU!!!" the huge group of fanboys charged for Kuroppi.

"RUN!!!!!" Kiiro shouted. The three new kunoichi, and Fuyu, ran as if their lives depended on it (which they did).

_'I I thought my day couldn't get any worse,' _Kuroppi thought.

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Team Gai was walking along the dirt road when a mob of young men about their age ran past them, chasing a swearing Inuzuka Kuroppi, a madly grinning and gasping in laughter Warai Kiiro, and an annoyed Hebitsukai Kon.

Neji stared at the army of fanboys for the five minutes it took for all of them to pass, then gasped.

"They left without me?!?" he whizzed after them.

"Go Neji go! Fight for your youthful love!" Gai and Lee yelled at the same time.

"I'm surrounded by idiots..." Tenten moaned.

Soon, the fanboys had one Hyuuga Neji at their head, Byakugan activated.

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Now that Neji had joined the mob, they ran with much more vigor.

"I think they're gaining on us!" Kiiro screamed, no longer having any fun.

A brown blur whizzed between the fanboys and Anko's gennnin. A white blur followed him soon after.

"DON'T... TOUCH... MY... SISTER!!!" Kiba yelled, giving off a killer intent to rivel Uchiha Sasuke's,_ if _ Uchiha Sasuke was tied on a log next to Uchiha Itachi with his arms, legs, and any other part of the body that can be used as a weapon (i.e. tongue) were all paralyzed, _and_ had both his sharingan and curse mark activated, with the song 'Pop Goes The Weasel' playing very shrilly in the background (lol bet sasuke loves that song!).

In other words, he was royally pissed.

Neji stopped running to stare at Kiba. "And if I do?" He calmly walked past Kiba and to Kuroppi, who was frozen in the spot.

"Hello, Kuro-sama," he said in a flirty voice.

"Hi, Kibaka!" Kiiro addressed Kiba. "And I still have a hard time believing THE Hyuuga Neji is a fanboy."

"Yeah. _Aren't you supposed to have a stick up your ass?_" Kuroppi asked.

"I am," Neji said. "Care to remove it?"

"EWW!" Kuroppi, Kon, and Kiiro ran for it--- again. The fanboys followed them, trampling Kiba as they went.

"Escape Plan 27-A!" Kuroppi shouted. The others nodded.

"HENGE (Transform)!" Kon and Kiiro yelled, transforming into Kuroppi (both with a fake Fuyu).

All three girls jumped side to side, overlapping, so the fanboys couldn't tell which was which.

After thirty seconds of hopping around, they turned to face the crowd.

"Which one is real?" challenged Kiiro-Kuroppi.

"Can you tell?" Kon-Kuroppi added.

"Because someone one who truly liked Kuroppi..." said Kuroppi.

"WOULD KNOW!" all three Kuroppi's yelled. Then, they split off in different directions.

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Kiiro ran for the library. Running as fast as she could, jumping from roof to roof.

"Kuro-sama! WAIT UP!"

"Oh, great," Kiiro muttered to herself. "I got Hyuuji-sempai. WHY SHOULD I WAIT FOR _YOU!_"

"You know you like me," Neji said smirking. "We were fated to be together."

"WHERE in all HELL do you come up with that CRAP?" Kiiro screamed back. _'Wow, he really thinks I'm Kuro-chan,'_ she thought.

"Ah-ha! Kuroppi doesn't say crap, she says s! _Warai Kiiro._"

_'Okay, so he knows her better than I give credit. How much of his time does he spend stalking her, anyway?'_ Kiiro undid her henge.

"NO, Hyuuji, Kuro-chan says crap sometimes too! Ne, you think so lowly of her! Why are you chasing her around?"

"It is fate," said Neji simply.

"Wow, Hyuuji, you're such an idiot." Kiiro pulled out a little red book and flipped throught the pages. She giggled evilly. "Okay Hyuuji, what's your birthday?"

"Why should I tell you? AND STOP CALLING ME HYUUJI!"

"If you tell me, I won't call you Hyuuji for the rest of the next two days. And I'll know if you lied, because I know where Team 8 trains and I can ask Hinachan-sempai. You have been warned."

"... Fine. April 16th." Neji muttered.

Kiiro flipped through the pages. "Okay... Lessee... Ah-ha! April 16th. _You are strong, diligent, hardworking, and succeed in all you do. However, you let those igher than you control every aspect of your life and spend too much time hating them to do anything about it. Also, you depend on fate too much, which is why you're reading this book anyway._"

"WHAT? I DO NOT!!! THAT BOOK IS BOGUS!" Neji roared.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YOU FELL FOR IT! Actually, it says: _You are ambitious and plan many things, most of which you carry out. You are energetic and enthusiastic, and though you graciously listen to others advice or critisism, you pursue your own course.You are loving and will have a happy home life. _HA!"

"Are you sure?" Neji asked suspiciously.

"Yes, that's what it says. This thing ain't one hundred percent accurate, though. I don't know about the loving part. I mean, you're so _mean_ to your poor cousin! Is it her fault? Are your problems _her _fault? No one picks where they're born or or who raises them. Nor do they pick their childhood or even clan status. It all just... happens. I suppose you'd call it fate. Which, I admit, is a really interesting way of thinking. But still, be nicer to Hinachan-sempai. S'not her fault, Hyuu-- Neji." Kiiro caught herslef in time.

"... I'll think about it." Neji lied. Fate was cruel to him for putting him into this situation.

"You're listening to my critisism, but you're choosing to go your own path, aren't you?" Kiiro teased, waving her little book around.

"... SHUT UP. Where's Kuro-sama?"

"I have no idea. I'll probably see her tomorrow."

"Where does she live?" Neji asked quickly.

"Should I tell him? Nah, I think I'll leave him to his own deivces now," Kiiro muttered to herself. "Besides, if he hasn't figured out where she lives by now, then he really is an idiot." she skipped away, singing something, leaving Hyuuga Neji annoyed and humiliated.

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Kuroppi ran and ran and ran, obviously the most scared of the fanboys, being the real 'Kuro-sama.'

"_Phew_... I think they're gone. But where the hell am I?" she looked around. She was in a perpetual ghost town. Lanterns were slashed and the doors were covered in old bloodstains. Kuroppi could swear she saw human bones poking out of the dirt in a couple places, as well.

"Sasuke," said a voice behind her. "You're still not strong enough."

Kuroppi whirled around to face a tall man in a black cloak with red clous on it. He poked her forehead.

"I'm. NOT. Sasuke," Kuroppi said in low, manecing tones.

"Sure you aren't," The man drawled. "Why haven't you tried to kill me yet? Foolish little brother."

"I'm not your brother. I'm not even an Uchiha!" Kuroppi yelled, Fuyu growling. "Also, I'm a girl!"

"Sasuke," the man gasped, "You got that operation to run away from me? I'm shocked."

"NO! I'm Inuzuka Kuroppi and I've only met Sasuke once in my entire life!"

"Really?" asked the man disbelievingly. "So, you met him... once. What happened?"

"I bumped into him, and he told me to go away. He also asked me why I don;t have face markings like the rest of the Inuzuka clan," Kuroppi growled. "What of it?"

"Sure... Sasuke." the man smirked.

"NOT SASUKE!" Kuroppi yelled again.

"Because we know people who _aren't_ Sasuke come the Uchiha complex often," scoffed another man who appeared behind the first. "Right?"

"Who are you? What's going on?" Kuroppi yelled.

"I think they brainwashed you, Sasuke, and then turned you into a girl," the first man said decidedly. "Well then... if you're not going to try to kill me, I'll leave. Farewell, foolish little brother. We will cross paths again."

"I'm NOT Sasuke!" Kuroppi yelled after the retreating figures.

"That guy said I'm in the Uchiha complex... that's useful. I know how to get home now." Kuroppi started walking home. "Who_ was_ he, anyway? He looked like a weasel," she said to herself.

Just then, Kiiro came running from behind a building. "WHAT THE HELL?!? That was a freaking S-CLASSED CRIMINAL!!!"

Then, she started laughing.

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Kon gasped for air. She has stopped in the park, fanboys still on her tail. _'I think this is far enough,' _she thought.

"The jig is up," she panted, turning back into herself with a poof of smoke. "Go home already!"

"YOU'RE NOT KURO-SAMA!" yelled the fanboys.

"Umm... yeah, duh." Kon sweatdropped.

"WE MUST FIND KURO-SAMA!" the fanboys yelled. They ran in the direction they had come, screaming Kuroppi's name. Kon watched as they faded into the distance, the proclaimiations of love for the Sasuke-look-alike slowly muting.

"Is it safe?" whispered a voice in a tree above Kon.

"It's safe," Kon said. "Relatively."

Kuroppi jumped out of the tree, followed by Kiiro.

"You wouldn't believe what part of town Kuro-chan just stumbled into," Kiiro snickered.

"Huh?" Kon asked.

"Guess! And no, it's not the red lioght district." Kiiro giggled.

"Kiiro, you perv." Kuroppi scoffed.

"I'm not a perv! You went there by accident once, remember? When we had just started at the academy."

"I was scarred for life," Kuropppi said in hushed whispers. All three girls giggled.

"Anyway, Kuroppi, running from the fangirls, of course stumbles into the UCHIHA DISTRICT!" Kiiro cracked up and began her usualy hyena laughter routine. "And-- get this! She runs straight into Uchiha Itachi, who thinks she's Sasuke! _His own brother! _AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Fuyu grinned a wolfy grin and made dog-ish chuckling noises. _"Arf-arf-arf-grrr,"_ she told Kuroppi, which roughly translates to: "She has a point there." Kuroppi's dog made more laughter-sounding sounds.

"From what I hear, his eyes are failing. That doesn't prove anything," Kuroppi said, fighting a losing battle.

"You wouldn't know that if Hatakashi hadn't told you that when we told him what happened."

"Why did we tell him again?" Kuroppi said. "We barely know him!"

"Because the only other person near the area was a boy who looked like Gai in chibi form. _Damn!_ Can't think of a good nickname for that jumpsuit jockey. No, wait! Maito Gai. Might Guy. Mighty Guy!" Kiiro cackled, enjoying the sheer joy creating the second nickname for the day. Then, she sighed. "Nah... not good enough. Man! His name sucks so much that I can't do anythign to it! Hnn... well, guess I'll have to splurge his first and last names together, then. Maito Gai. Mai? Gaito? Hnn... yeah. Gaito! That'll work." Kiiro nodded, smirking triumphantly.

"You have _far _too much spare time on your hands," Kuroppi grumbled.

"I know," Kiiro answered cheekily. "Oh! I bet Anko-sensei's over her hangover now!"

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Team 4 were all sitting in a dango shop, munching on dango (Akimichi Chouji, who was across the way, stared at the speed with which Kiiro ate in envy).

"This stuff gets better every time I try it!" Kiiro said happily.

"You and your dango obsession," Kuroppi sighed, shaking her head.

"What's wrong with dango?!?" Kiiro and Anko yelled. Kuroppi just stared.

"Nothing's wrong with dango," she said exasperatedly. "I really like it myself. But Kiiro, you've been having dango for breakfast for the past three years. Don't you think you should try something else for a change?"

"I suppose you have a point..." Kiiro sighed. "Well... I'll try other places then."

"Good. Because this constant talk of dango is making me sick."

"I'll go on a food journey!" Kiiro said excitedly. "I'll search that section of town I don't know where anything is and find some good food there!" she cheered.

"Why do I know this will end badly?" Kon sighed.

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Shashuko: Yay! I got stuck a couple times here... next time, we'll have our first REAL mission! No more of this wishywashy D ranked crap.

Kuroppi: You're going to copy the Wave Arc, aren't you.

Shashuko: No! But I'm using Haku-chan.

Kon: Yeah, she's copying the Wave Arc.


	3. The Mission of Team Four

Shashuko: And teh New Chappie is underway! I don't own Naruto--

Sasuke: ---I do.---

Shashuko: --Sasuke does.

Naruto: I belong to no one!

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Kiiro yawned as she got out of bed. She looked around her small apartment and waved at the picture of her aunt and uncle.

"Obasan (auntie), Ojisan (uncle), isn't the brat-ling almost old enough to join the Academy? ... _Joy._ Well, we'll see if he wants to. It's my Mama's legacy, not his mama's after all."

She smiled and yawned. "I'll have to visit soon. To show off my hitai-ate... and to get more cocoa powder. I'm almost out."

Then, Kiiro realized that she was talking to a photograph and started laughing.

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Team Four did their warmups as usual, sparring with taijutsu (Kiiro lost). They'd now been a team for almost a month and Anko _still_ scared them. But she scares everyone, so that's not new.

Anko smirked as the three gennin lay panting on the grass. "Today, maggots, we've got a _Special_ mission."

"What is it?" Kiiro huffed.

"Please don't tell me we're catching that cat again," Kuroppi pleaded, scratching Fuyu behind the ears.

"Nope! Follow me!" Anko sped off through the trees, a tan-and-purple blur.

"I hate it when she does that," Kon sighed.

"I know! I can barely see her," Kiiro added.

Kuroppi looked at them weirdly. "C'mon, guys, she's not THAT fast."

"Yes she is!" Kiiro moaned. "You're just super-observant!"

They followed Anko through the trees, ending up in front of the Hokage Tower.

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"This mission is C-ranked," Tsunade began.

"W00t! C-ranker! C-ranker!" Kiiro shouted.

"For someone who wants to be a great Summoner like the sannin, you're awfully rude to me," Tsunade said darkly.

"Ahhhh! Sorry Tsunade-sama it's just that we've been catching chickens all month," Kiiro said quickly.

"That's what I thought. Now, it's as simple as this: you're going to work in a hot chocolate shop for awhile."

Kiiro gasped.

"And, since Kiiro was raised by people who own a chocolate shop, I thought this mission would be perfect for you."

Kiiro nodded enthusiastically.

Tsunade handed Anko a scroll. "You will also be making sure no one gets the secret recipe of this place, since ominous notes about their special formula have been sent several times. No one are to know you are ninja, so you will say you're temporary workers until the owner of the stand can find better waitresses. Understand?"

"Yes, Hokage-sama!" said Anko and Kiiro at the same time.

"Jinx-you-owe-me-a-stick-of-dango," Anko teased.

"Fine," Kiiro huffed.

"Good." Tsunade smiled. "Now _get out!"_

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Kiiro walked along the path outside of Konoha, humming something and looked very pleased with herself.

"You're going the wrong way, retard," Kuroppi yelled after her from the opposite direction.

"I knew that!" Kiiro said sarcastically, running over to her team.

They were all packed up and heading out. Kon was reading a justu scroll as they walked, and Kuroppi had an iPod.

"I need one of those things," Kiiro sighed.

"But they're so fragile. Not worth it, if you ask me," Anko said, a step ahead of everyone else. She spoke as if she had some sort of deep grudge against iPods.

"Are you okay, Anko-sensei?" Kiiro called after her.

"No, just thinking," Anko sighed. "You three remind me of another team I knew once..."

"Who?"

Anko stuck out her tongue. "Not telling."

Kiiro moaned. "I'm so bored! _Man._ I brought a book, so I could read like Kon-kun is right now, but it's heavy! _Dangit. _Plus, I'll probably trip if I don't keep my eyes on the road."

Kuroppi smirked. "You'll probably trip anyway, klutz."

"Aw, shut it," Kiiro said, not really meaning it.

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Following behind them on the side of the road were two figures, about the same height.

"Why are we following them, Aki-san?" one asked the other in a voice that was neither male nor female.

"Because they're interesting," said the other. But Aki... was looking at the dog in the group, not the people.

"Aki, that dog, is that--?"

**"Maybe."**

Aki smiled warmly, then went back to watching.

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Team Four walked into the chocolate bar, tired and dusty from the journey. Needless to say, Kiiro was skipping happily.

"What can I do ya for?" asked the middle-aged man behind the counter. He had brown hair with a bald spot and oval glasses. "What the--- bless my soul! Is that you, Kiiro?"

"Hiya, Wakegi-ojisan! How's Ganchan?"

"Gangu is just fine. What are you doing here? Running an errand for your uncle?"

"Nah. Actually, I haven't seen Hitomoji-ojisan or Fuyuki-obasan for a few months now!"

"Then what in the world are you doing here?"

Anko cleared her throat. "I'm Mitarashi Anko. You called for some shinobi?" She pulled out a business card (Mitarashi Anko, sadistic ninja. Contact 867-5309 or by yelling name really loudly within ten miles of Konohagakure. Or just scream in general, so I can see what's hurting you and if I can hurt you too).

"I'm here on a MISSION! For YOU!" Kiiro said cheerfully. "See the headband?"

"I get it now. Well, let me show the others around. Who are they?"

Kiiro grinned. "This is Inuzuka Kuroppi, who before you ask is NOT an Uchiha, that's her dog Fuyu, this is Mitarashi Anko, my jounin sensei, who before you ask is NOT sane, and Hebitsukai Kon, who before you ask is NOT using a henge to keep so short."

Kon punched Kiiro in the stomach.

"Oof! Okay, I deserved that. Guys, this is Wakegi-ojisan and he runs this chocolate shop. He also friends with my uncle who raised me, who owns another chocolate shop in the next town over. His son Gangu is four and I call him Ganchan. He's super cute! That takes care of that."

"So that's why you're so hyper," Anko muttered. "You were raised on chocolate!"

"Yup! And the stuff here is really, really good!" Kiiro sang, getting out a huge paper bag full to the brim with cocoa power. "Let's get to work!"

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Kiiro, Kon, and Kuroppi worked for a week without a hitch (except for the fact that Anko spent all her time at the local bar, eating mountains upon mountains of dango).

However, little did they know that Aki and her subordinate were watching from the shadows.

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"Today, I need you to go find them." Aki whispered.

"Understood. Should I engage them in conversation, Aki-san?" Aki's friend was curious as well as eager to help.

"No, only if they talk to you first, for now. Pay special attention to the dog."

Aki's friend nodded and got something out that he hadn't in awhile: a pink sleeveless kimono.

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"If we're supposed to be protecting the secret recipe, why are we using it? He shouldn't trust us this much," Kon muttered, scooping cream into a mug.

"He wasn't planning on it, but I already knew it anyway. Hitomoji-ojisan helped design this recipe, after all." Kiiro giggled.

"Maybe the person who wants to steal it is your uncle then," Anko said, coming in.

"Don't be stupid. Hitomoji-ojisan's chocolate is even better than the stuff here."

"I find that hard to believe," Anko said, drinking the contents of a mug that was intended for a customer.

"It's true!" Kiiro said. "On the other hand, I'm biased, so I could be wrong. But at any rate, my uncle has chances to go international." She giggled, grabbed her tray and walked into the serving area to get someone their drink.

"Waitress!" yelled a person from the other end of the room.

"Comiiing! Here you go, sir, and I'll come for the check later." Kiiro set the tray down and ran around the tables to the other customer.

Said person had long brown hair that reached a little past their shoulders and a pink kimono-yukata thing with no sleeves.

"What can I get you, sir?" Kiiro asked perkily.

"You can tell I'm not a girl?" the person asked, shocked.

"Well, you've got manlyish shoulders. If that makes any sense. Also, no one's THAT flat." Kiiro said, nodding at the boy's flattish chest.

Meanwhile, In Konoha, one Haruno Sakura sneezed, all over the Fifth Hokage's papers. Thankfully, Tsunade didn't notice.

"I see," said the person. "My name's Haku. What's yours?" Haku smiled warmly.

Kiiro grinned. "Warai Kiiro, at your service. What can I get you?"

Haku glanced at his menu. "I'll have... a Mayan, iced if you please."

"Coming right up!" Kiiro said happily, walking into the kitchen.

"There's a guy with long brown hair out in the waiting area," Kiiro to Kuroppi casually, grinning evilly as she got out the ingredients for Haku's Mayan chocolate.

"NEJI'S HERE?!?" Kuroppi yelled, holding up a random frying pan menacingly.

"No, no, his name's Haku and he's not a pervert. Actually, he has better hair than Neji. Waaay better." Kiiro nodded seriously. "Plus, he doesn't wear it in that dorky almost-out ponytail. He wears it in a bun."

"A BUN?" Kon asked, sweatdropping.

"Yup! A bun. He's wearing a pink outfit, too, so I think he might be a cross-dresser of some sort." Kiiro poured ice into a glass, then poured Haku's hot chocolate into it.

"What the HELL is that?" Kuroppi asked.

"It's an iced chocolate! I'm surprised he knew what it was. It usually takes a choco-fanatic like my uncle, or someone who knows someone like my uncle to ask for it without it being suggested. Which I probably should start doing, since it's so hot today." Kiiro walked out with Haku's iced chocolate and gave it to him.

"Thank you," he said politely, taking a sip.

"You're welcome! I'm glad you like it!" Kiiro said genuinely.

_'That girl..." _Haku thought. _'She' reminds me of-'_

"Kiiro, I'm taking a break. Don't break anything," Kuroppi called as she walked out with Fuyu.

"Hey! I've only broken three glasses this week. And that clumsy even for me!" kiiro yelled back.

"Whatever, klutz."

"Kuro-chan!!! Be nice!!!"

_'And that girl looks and acts just like... him!'_

Haku drank his chocolate quickly and put his payment and a tip on the table, leaving to follow the girl who looked like Sasuke.

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"Fuyu, Mom says if I can beat Kiba-niisan in a fight, I can officially become one of the clan, markings and all." Kuroppi said to her dog, who barked, in reply, something along the lines of that shouldn't be to hard. kiba would probably let you win.

"I know, but if he lets me win, that wouldn't be right."

yes it would. you should be in the clan anyway just because they adopted you.

"True, true," Kuroppi said thoughtfully.

"That's an interesting dog," said a voice behind her.

Kuroppi turned around to see a girl with spiky, jet-black hair in a high ponytail.

"Sorry, I was just curious. What breed is she?" she asked awkwardly.

"I'm not sure. My family found her... most of us have dogs, so she ended up being mine."

"Okay. I'm a bit of a dog enthusiast myself, so I was... curious." the girl lied.

"I see..." Kuroppi replied, sweatdropping. _'She's hiding something.' _she thought, holding out her hand.

"I'm Inuzuka Kuroppi. And my dog's name is Fuyu."

The other girl took Kuroppi's hand. "Himura Aki."

Fuyu smelled Aki's other hand curiously. she seems like a good person, she barked to Kuroppi, who nodded.

"KURO-CHAAAAN! WE NEED YOU BACK IN!" Kiiro yelled, running up and hugging Kuroppi. "Ouji-sama's off now!"

"Okay, fine."

Kiiro let go of Kuroppi and ran off back towards the chocolate shop, Kuroppi walking behind with her hands in her pockets.

"Well, Aki-san?"

Aki turned around to face Haku, who was sitting at a ramen bar, hiding from Kuroppi so as to hear everything without getting in the way.

"Was it who we thought it was?" he asked curiously.

Aki nodded, her voice changing to a deeper wiser one and her hair turning the purest white.

**"That was definitely her. Inuzuka... Fuyu..."**

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Shashuko: w00t! evilne cliffy!

Kon: Stop calling me Ouji-sama!

Shashuko: noes! anyways, time for the imporant point: there are a couple faves for this, but NO REVIEWS! except from people I know in real life (not that you people don't count or anything). Tell me what you think, please! Even it's just sorta 'there' and you don't have any particular opinions about this, I want to know them!

Sasuke: you're just begging to get flamed, aren't you?

Shashuko: Shut up, Sasu-teme. I don't need your additude, I have my own.

Naruto: I still don't belong to anyone! Now review!


	4. Team Four and the FiveTails

Shashuko: yays next chapter! I got stuck...

Shikamaru: you were too lazy to write for seven days... that scares even me.

Shashuko: SHUT UP! And I don't own Naruto--

Naruto: and for the last time, shashuko, neither does does.

Sasuke: whatever you say, usuratonkachi.

Shashuko: by the way, Hokou is the gobi, the five-tails, from the bijuu legend. I don't own her either. I made up some of her abilites though. I do own Honemashi and Banshou, who you'll meet soon, and Aki belongs to **ShikyoShinzui.**... or at least I think that's what her name is. Oh! If you read my Host Club ficcies, Banshuo is based off of Stephy/koshou (I couldn't call her koshou becuase all of my other OC's have names that start with 'K' too and it's confusing).

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A full moon showed as Haku and Aki stood on a hill outside the village, looking down, their Kiri (mist) forehead proectors gleaming in the moonlight. A rustling was heard behind them and a small boy with white hair and two dots above his eyebrows, wearing a white and red yukata came out to join them.

"Aki-chan," the boy said quietly. "What are we doing here?"

"There is someone down there precious to Hokou," Aki explained. "She wants to meet this person."

"Ah." the boy nodded and smiled. "Are you going to call them?"

_**"Yes." **_Aki's voice grew deeper as before as her hair acquired the same whitish hue. This time, however, fur began to sprout on Aki's body. Her ears moved up and became large and pointy, and claws grew out of her fingers and feet. Lastly, her tailbone sprouted into five gleaming white tails, sleek and shining.

Aki was Hokou's carrier, and Hokou's seal was less binding than most. When taking over, Hokou could not usually become much larger than this, but she could serve her purpose at the height nontheless.

Hokou arched her head up and howled at the moon... or so it would seem.

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Kuroppi was trying to sleep. However, on nights like this, Fuyu could be restless.

"Fuyu," Kuroppi groaned. "What is it?"

_Something is calling me. _A wolf's howl was heard in the distance. _They bear us no ill, they only wish to chat. _Kuroppi nodded. "Let's go see what's up. I'm not going to get any sleep with you rolling around like that anyway."

"Can I come?" Kiiro's voice asked. "I can't sleep either!"

"Kiiro, stop waking me up," grumbled the voice of the team's last Gennin.

Just thenn, Anko walked in, holding her midnight snack (a dango stick). "And just WHERE do you maggots think you're going?"

"They're not going anywhere! Fuyu's being called and I'm going with her. That's all!"

Fuyu grinned wolfishly. _Can I bring my owner's team as well? _she howled towards the thing that was calling her.

The wolf in the distance howled its reply: _Whatever Fuyu, just hurry! I can't stay long._

"Why do you do these things to me?" Kuroppi asked Fuyu exasperatedly.

Fuyu barked softly. _They should come. Them knowing this could be an advantage._

"Well?" Kiiro asked. "What is it? Can I go?"

"Yes," Kuroppi sighed. "Come on."

Kuroppi, Kiiro, Kon, Anko, and Fuyu ran out the door and towards the howler (lol harry potter!), still wearing their nightclothes. Only Kuroppi and Anko had the foresight to strap on their weapon holsters.

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"You know, Honemashi, when Aki lets Hokou-san take over with just changing her hair color, she looks kind of like you," Haku said to the small boy. "Do you think she might be related...?"

The little boy, HonemashiHonemashi, shook his head vigorously. "My clan all got themselves killed, and the only one saved was me. But, she is from the same village as me, and you, I guess, but you were born a civiian, right? You came to Kiri (Mist) because Zabuza found you."

"That right." Haku nodded sadly.

"What happened to him, anyway?" the little boy asked curiously. "He died, right? I'm surprised Aki-chan didn't help him too."

"He was too torn up..." Haku said, looking away.

_**"Be quiet! They're coming," **_the Hokou growled.

"Hokou's been waiting to meet Fuyu for quite some time. Let's make sure this goes smoothly," said Aki's voice. "I ask you two to go back to camp for the time being."

HonemashiHonemashi shrugged.

Both boys nodded and disappeared into the trees, as Fuyu came into their sight through the bushes by Kuroppi, then Anko, then Kon and Kiiro. When Anko saw the Hokou, she knew immediately what it was and just stood there, shell-shocked. Kon and Kiiro had to walk around her to get into the clearing.

"What is this all about?" Kuroppi asked annoy-edly. "It's past midnight!"

Fuyu took one look at Kokou and ran for her.

_Mother! _the smaller dog barked.

_**"Fuyu, my child," **_said the Hokou. _**"I can take off your seal now."**_

_Thank you, Mother. _

"Okay, what the hell is going on?!?" Kuroppi yelled.

"OMYGOSH FIVE-TAILS!" Kiiro gasped. "Are you the Gobi no Hokou-sama?"

_**"Yes... why?" **_Hokou visibly sweatdropped.

"Eheh nothing. I just really like demons and I don't think I've ever met one before. Especially one of the Bijuu-sama." Kiiro looked away, embarrassed.

Hokou sweatdropped again. _'This girl has issues,' _she thought.

"Anyway, what the hell is going on?" Kon echoed Kuroppi's words.

_**"If you wait a minute, Fuyu will explain."**_

"Fuyu TALKS?!?" Kiiro yelled.

"Apparently, Smart One," Kuroppi scoffed.

The Hokou laid her head on Fuyu, who began to glow. A pattern that looked like a seal showed on her back, but disintegrated.

_"See?"_ Fuyu asked, speaking in a human-sounding voice. _"I _can_ talk."_

"THAT'S SO COOL!" gasped Kiiro.

_"Not really. My sisters all do the same."_ Fuyu shrugged all four of her shoulders. _"Anyway, the reason I know the Five-Tails is because she's my mother."_

"Your... mother?" Kuroppi asked. "Hnn... then why did the Inuzuka clan find you a small puppy mangled in the streets?" she asked, confused.

The Hokou chuckled darkly. _**"Every hundred years or so, I send one of my children to that clan, and have that child report back to see what life is like in the human world. I wasn't expecting my child to be taken in by an Uchiha, though."**_

"I'M NOT AN UCHIHA." Kuroppi glared Uchiha-ishly.

_**"Yes you are," **_the Hokou replied smugly.

"I'M NOT."

_**"I created the Sharingan and I **__**know**__** you are."**_

"You WHAT?" Kuroppi asked.

"The Uchiha were once all Hyuugas--" started Kiiro.

Fuyu looked at Kiiro, shocked. "You know how that happened? Who told you?"

"I read it in one of my Bijuu books! I have like fifteen!" Kiiro giggled at the prospect. "I'm learning more and more every day!"

Fuyu and Kuroppi stared at Kiiro. Just stared.

Kuroppi was the first to break the silence.

"You have too much spare time on your hands," she stated.

"Eh heh... yeah, I could've been training. But Bijuu are so cool!"

Hokou smirked. _**"Well, it is true that we kick ass. Anyway, yes, the original Uchiha, Uchiha Kyouichi, was a jinchuuriki of mine. We made a deal: he weakened my seal greatly and gave me more freedom, and I gave him power."**_

Fuyu continued. "Mother's techniques may mainly lie in illusion, but the other Bijuu all leak chakra. Mother can suck up this chakra and use the abilities of these demons in small amounts. For instance, the Rokubi, Raijuu, can control lightning at will. If Mother has stored up enough of Raijuu's chakra, then she can control lightning herself to some extent. But the amount she collects are very small, and to a demon mean nothing. So, for the most part, Mother will let her Jinchuuriki use these powers."

"If you have a jinchuuriki, then why are you completely transformed into yourself?" Kon questioned.

The Hokou looked away sheepishly. _**"I'm not. I'm covered in fur, but I'm in my Jinchuuriki's body. She lets me take over from time to time."**_

_"Ahhh."_ Kiiro nodded. "That makes sense. Anyway, what were you saying about the sharingan?" she took out a notepad for note-taking.

_**"In the same way that I can imitate the other Bijuus' techniques, the Sharingan can copy other's justu. I also added some of my genjutsu skills to the sharingan as a bonus, but those are only unlocked through extreme guilt."**_

"The Mangekyo Sharingan," Kiiro whispered. Then, she gasped and turned to Kuroppi. "Kuro-chan, never ever ever activate the Mangekyo! I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!"

Kuroppi stared at Kiiro. "What... the... hell? Are you talking about."

_**"The Mangekyou Sharingan, usually activated by killing your closest friend. The guilt unlocks a powerful genjustu ability."**_

"Why would you put a thing like that?" Kuroppi questioned.

_**"What? I was bored." **_ The Hokou looked away. _**"I was curious to see how long it took for them to figure it out... very few did and they kept it to themselves. Even most Uchiha do not know at this point."**_

Kiiro furrowed her brows "You mean they wouldn't if they were still alive? Becuase if Kuro-chan's really an Uchiha then that chalks the number up to three. The other two are the famous Uchiha Sasuke and Itachi, known for betraying them village and large hordes of fangirls."

_**"I know that!" **_Hokou barked, _**"And even most of the dead ones STILL don't know!"**_

"How would you know a thing like that?" Anko asked, coming out of her shock.

_**"One of my jinchuuriki's subordinates told me,"**_ explained the Hokou. _**"He sees the dead in his sleep."**_

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Haku and Honemashi reached a small campfire with four sleeping bags around it. There was a girl with blonde hair and glasses, wearing a brown jacket with tan pants sitting there and roasting marshmallows. Around her neck was a Suna (sand) hitai-ate (headband) and on her face was a content expression. She was humming the Beatles song 'A Day in the Life' under her breath.

"You're back," she said absently, noticing the other two and pulling her marshmallow out fo the fire and putting it between two graham crackers. "Where's Aki-san?"

"Aki's still under Hokou's control over that way, talking to her precious person." Haku gestured in the direction from whence he and Honemashi had came. "Where did you get the marshmallows, Banshou?"

"Aki-san told me I could get them as long as I hid my hitai-ate. By precious person, do you mean her daughter, Fuyu?"

"How many other Fuyus do we know?" Honemashi grumbled, getting into a sleeping bag. "You know the Akatsuki killed the others."

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_"They WHAT?!?" _Fuyu yelled. The Hokou nodded sadly.

_**"You are the last of my children," **_she whispered.

"The Akatsuki killed your children? What for?" Kiiro asked, sounding worried.

_**"They seem to have an interest in the bijuu. That is all I know." **_

"That's unfortunate," Kuroppi said, putting a hand on Fuyu. "We're sorry."

Fuyu growled, then screamed, _"Let me at 'em! I'LL KILL THEM! I'LL KILL THEM! ALL OF THEM!!!"_

_**"Fuyu, it would not be wise to try and find them." **_the Hokou said remorsefully. _**"They are too strong."**_

_"How...?" _Fuyu asked, clearly shocked. _"They were strong. Stronger than me. How could a mere human kill them?"_

_**"They have tools, powerful tools. Tools that could even seal away a Bijuu with my strength at least. Possibly even my brother the Kyuubi."**_

"That strong?" gasped Kiiro.

_**"Some of them, yes. Not**_** most **_**of them, but some of them."**_

"Why would anyone want to just randomly seal away a demon like that? Are they prejudiced or something?!?" Kiiro yelled. "DEMON HATERS!!! I hate them all!!!"

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"Wow, someone over there is _really_ loud..." Honemashi groaned. "They woke me up."

"That person must like demons a lot," Haku guessed.

"Ya think?" Banshou asked sarcastically. "Pass me the graham crackers."

"You're not going to have any room for breakfast tomorrow if you keep that up," Haku said to her.

Banshou looked at him strangely. _"And?" _she asked, putting the marshmallow on the graham crackers and applied chocolate, then starting to eat her twenty-seventh s'more.

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_**"At any rate, Uchiha..."**_ the Hokou said to Kuroppi._** "Please take care of Fuyu. I obviously wouldn't do much of a job, considering what happen to her sisters."**_

Kuroppi nodded, then glared. "DON'T call me Uchiha. I was raised Inuzuka, and Inuzuka I'll stay."

"Kuro-chan! Do you know to whom you speak?" Kiiro gasped. "The five-tails! She's anything but tame. You can't just insult her like that!"

_**"At least SOMEONE shows me respect. Unlike you, Uchiha."**_

"Inuzuka."

_**"Uchiha."**_

"Inuzuka."

_**"Uchiha."**_

"Inuzuka." The demon and the Sasuke-look-alike glared at each other.

Fuyu rolled her eyes._"She's both Inzuka_ _and__ Uchiha. Mother, you have to stop arguing with every human you run into."_

_**"Whatever. But she's still an Uchiha." **_The Hokou grinned wolfishly.

_"Inuzuka."_

Kiiro giggled. "I guess that explains why you look so much like Sasuke," she teased.

_**"If he's an Uchiha, too, then that makes sense. They all look the same," **_the Hokou chuckled. _**"Anyway, what is it with you and demons? I thought humans hated us."**_

"Only most of them! Though I don't know why. How could you hate something that totally KICKS ASS?" Kiiro said. "Oh... wait! Maybe they're jealous 'coz demons are so much stronger. The whole 'Kyuubi attacking Konoha' thing doesn't help much either." she shook her head.

_**"Well, we DO kick ass," **_the Hokou agreed. _**"However, I can't hold this form much longer, as this is draining on both me and my jinchuuriki. Could you get her to her camp, or at least call her subordinates?"**_

"We'll carry her!" Kiiro said cheerfully.

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"She'll carry _who?_" Banshou asked no one in particular. "Wow. I don't think I've ever met someone that loud before."

"Be careful," Honemashi chuckled. "If you keep talking like that, you will. And it won't be good on your eardrums either."

"That voice..." said Haku. "Was she the girl from the chocolate shop?"

"The one who looked like that one guy?" Banshou asked. Honemashi, who was still trying to get back to sleep, looked up.

"No, the other one, but she looks like the _other_ guy," Haku explained.

"Oh, okay then," Bansou said, as if that explained everything. "Does their sensei look like the masked guy?"

Honemashi growled. He had no idea what they were talking about.

Haku shook his head at Banshou's question. "No, and she doesn't act like him either. She's too busy eating dango to read those books."

"OKAY!" Honemashi yelled. "WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT?!?"

The other two stared at Honemashi. Haku opened his mouth to answer, but a certain blonde girl came crashing through the bush, carrying Aki.

"Hi! Hokou-sama told me to take her here. Is that okay?" Kiiro set Aki down on top of one of the sleeping bags.

"HEY! GET HER OFF OF ME!!!" Honemashi, who was inside the selfsame sleeping bag, yelled.

"Oh! Sorry there, little guy. You're so tiny, I didn't see you!" Kiiro giggled, with no hint of malice. She picked up Aki and put her on another sleeping there. "Is that okay?"

"As long as you don't LAY HER OVER ME... and I'm NOT tiny!!!" Honemashi screamed. Kiiro, being much louder than Honemashi, was not at all phased.

"But you're like, eight, right? All people that much younger than me are tiny. Becuase I'm SO TALL!"

"Shhh, Kiiro. You're going to wake up Aki-san," Haku whispered.

"Haku-san? What are you doing here?"

"I... work for Aki, in a sense. So do Honemashi-san and Banshou-san, here, but Banshou-san is from Suna and not Kiri (Mist) like the rest of us, so she doesn't come with us very often."

"Ah! You're a ninja?" Kiiro asked as her teammates and sensei crahsed through the bushes in the same manner that Kiiro had earlier.

Kuroppi stared at Haku. "Kiiro, wasn't that guy you tricked me into thinking was Neji?"

"He still is," Kiiro said in a smart-alecky tone.

"She has a point there," Banshou said, nodding. "Marshmallow? We're making s'mores."

"Make them go away..." Honemashi whined. "I want to go to sleep..."

"Thank you!" said Kiiro, taking a marshmallow and outting in on a random stick she found lying on the ground. Anko followed suit, but Kon and Kuroppi just stood there, sweatdropping.

After awhile, Banshou started humming. Then, she started to sing:

"Hey, Bungalo Bill!-"

Kiiro joined in.

"What did you kill?

"Bungalo Bill...

"Hey, Bungalo Bill!

"What did you kill?"

Banshou gasped. "You like the Beatles, too?"

"Who doesn't?" Kiiro asked.

"YAY! I need your email."

"Okay, here--" Kiiro took a small notebook out of her pajama pocket (when did she out THAT there?) and write something down on a page, then ripped it out and handed it to Banshou. "Now, write yours."

"Wait! Mine too," Anko said.

Kon and Kuroppi started twitching at the eyes. "HOW CAN YOU JUST TRUST THEM LIKE THAT?!?" they yelled at the same time.

"Because I'm an idiot," was Kiiro's response.

"Becuase I'm probably stonger than these guys anyway," stated Anko.

Kon sighed, shaking her head. "Let's go. We need to sleep for working in that shop tomorrow."

"Come visit us!" Kiiro said to Haku cheerfully.

"I will," he said. "That chocolate was good."

"Chocolate? I'M COMING TOO!" Banshou squealed.

"STOP WAKING ME UP!!!" Honemashi roared. Then, he went back to sleep.

There was a silence over the camp...

"Well, see ya later," Kiiro whispered, laughing under her breath."

"See ya!" Banshou whispered back.

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The next morning, everyone, was tired... except Kiiro.

"Welcome! What would you like, sir?" she cheerfully asked someone with whitish hair. He was wearing a gray hat and suit like an old guy, but his face was young.

"I'd like... a spicy classic." he said, looking away (in Kon's general direction).

"Should I ice it?" Kiiro asked. "And stop staring at Kon-chan. We don't like perverts here and she's upset over having to wear these uniforms." She gestured at her frilly grey dress with dark blue accents (her hitai-ate was around her neck and under her collar, as she wasn't supposed to let others she was a ninja). "Even though they're so cute."

"If you're discouraging perverts, don't call yourself cute," the sliver-haired man said.

"Ah!" Kiiro hung her head at her own stupidity. "Um... should I ice your hot chocolate?"

"Sure," the man said, cluelessly.

"Okay!" Kiiro skipped off, waving at Haku, Aki, and Banshou's table (Honemashi has refused to come) at she passed.

The man returned to staring openly at Kon. She turned and glared with yellow eyes. The man was frozen for a moment, then he shook himself and looked away. He had a mission to complete. He couldn't fail.

His eyes fell on Aki and he gasped, pushing his hat down so no one could see his face.

Kiiro came back in with his chocolate. The man made his move.

In a flash, he stood up and ran past her and into the kitchen.

"THE THIEF!" Kiiro yelled at the other two.

The man grabbed a piece of paper and a large bag of chocolate, the ran out the door in a blur, followed by Team Anko in close pursuit. His hat fell off in the process, and Aki saw his face.

"That was...!" she stood up and ran after him. "Haku, come with me! Banshou, go get Honemashi!"

The two subordinates nodded and also left.

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"WAKE UP!" Banshou yelled, shaking a small white-haired boy, who was hugging a black teddy bear.

"Go awayyy... I'm tired." Honemashi rolled over, squeezing the bear. "You and those Konoha freaks kept me up half the night!"

Banshou leaned down to glare Honemashi full in the face. "Aki needs our help," she said tersely.

Honemashi slowly got up and yawned. "What for?"

"We found _that person, _from Sound."

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"GIVE US BACK THE FORMULA!!!" Kiiro yelled.

"Why should I?" the man taunted back, speeding up.

Just then, Aki and Haku caught up to the others.

_"You're my mother's carrier, correct?" _Fuyu questioned. Aki nodded.

"This man is working for someone else. We need to catch him before he reaches his destination," said Haku. "In addition, he is responsible for the slaughter of one of Aki's precious people."

Aki looked at her feet, reminiscing sais precious person, when Kiiro's loud and harpyish voice reminded her her what she was doing.

"Okay," Kiiro said, grinning at the prospect of a fight. "Let's go!"

Kabuto smirked to himself. He would get these idiots to his master in no time at all.

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Me: YAYS! Oh, oh! I have a secret! Kiiro is based off of me!

Kuroppi: Anyone can tell that, retard.

Me: GRRRRR...

Banshou: Leprechauns go boing! Please review!


	5. Team Four Is Captured

Shashuko: WHEE! FUN CHAPTER... OUJI-SAMA STARS!

Kon: (sarcastically) greeeaaaat... Thankfully, Shashuko does not own Naruto...

Kuroppi: But Sasuke---

Naruto: NEITHER DOES SASUKE! Stop doing that.

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Kabuto smirked as the four Konoha ninja (plus Haku and Aki, who are, in fact, Mist-nin) followed him. _'Almost there...'_

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Banshou and Honemashi ran. They knew where Aki was. They always knew.

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_'Right here!' _Kabuto skidded to a stop. "You're trapped," he stated, smirking nerd-ishly (NERD! NERD! KABUTO'S A NERD! AHAHAHA- okay I'm done).

"But there's one of him, and like seven of us," Kiiro said, furrowing her brow. "I don't get it."

"This person is not to be underestimated," Aki growled. "If you do, you will regret it."

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Unlike _some_ demons, the Hokou had a _nice _cage. It was pretty big and she cleaned it regularly, so there wasn't water everywhere or anythiing (wouldn't that be GROSS?).

Aki appeared. "We ran into Kabuto," she said through gritted teeth.

_**"...And you want the power to kill him?"**_

Aki sweatdropped. "Yes, actually."

_**"If I lend you enough power, you'll go into a rage. Last time, you did and it still wasn't enough. Not to mention you don't want Haku or those others to die."**_

Unlike _some_ avengers, Aki listened to reason, sighed, and nodded. "Just enough to not get killed yet, then."

_**"Done."**_

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Kiiro glared at Kabuto. "What's with the hair?" she finally asked.

Kabuto glared at Kiiro. "What _about _my hair? You can't make fun of its length when your friend there had longer hair than mine."

"Technically, I can, because insults don't listen to logic. Neee... that's not what I meant anyway. Your hair is so DAMAGED! Do you ever use shampoo?"

Kabuto looked down, angrily. "I don't want to talk about it."

Anko smirked. "Let me guess-- Orochimaru stole all the conditioner for that longish mane of his?"

"Yes. WAIT! How do you know that?"

"Anko-sensei was trained by Orochimaru-san. Right?" Kiiro asked.

Anko looked away. "Yes...he used and left me for dead."

"That's so sad! Can I hug you?" Kiiro asked.

"I don't need your pity," Anko said coldly.

"Sensei is so mean..." the blonde idiot whined.

Kon sweatdropped. "Shouldn't we focus on what's going on? Like who is that guy and why did he steal the formula?"

Kabuto smirked. "This formula? That's easy." He took the formula and threw it on the ground. Kiiro gasped (remember, her uncle helped make that formula).

"I stole the formula to get YOU!" he lunged at Kon and grabbed her around the waist, then started running again.

"Let me go!" she yelled, trying to punch him. He only gripped her tighter as she continued to struggle. Eventually, she bit on the arm, thinking it was worth a shot.

She was NOT, however, expecting Kabuto to fall over, gripping his arm as if in pain.

"What the HELL?" she asked herself.

Kabuto started to shake. "You knew!" he gasped.

Kon glared at him, taking the formula back. "Knew_ what?_"

He laughed halfheartedly. "Apparently not. _This!_" pulling back his sleeve, Kabuto showed them a mark appearing on his arm. It looked like a bird.

Kon's eyes widened. "What is that?"

"A curse mark. Something Orochimaru does to small children when he's feeling particularly sadistic," Anko said. "While able to grant a person power, they can also be very painful if the giver of the--" Anko gasped and gripped her neck.

"Thank you for the introduction, Anko-chan," came a belittling voice from the trees and someone stepped out, "But I'll take it from here."

Anko glared at the person. "Orochimaru."

Orochimaru grinned in a snakelike manner. "Surprised to see me?" he turned to face Kon. "Hmm... you seem to have grown up well. Has my former student taken good care of you?"

"What's going on?" Kon asked, reaching for her senbon pouch.

"You don't remember me?" Orochimaru asked, in false-offended tones. "I'm surprised at you, Kon-chan! After all..." he leaned in to speak in Kon's ear. "I am you."

"W-what?!?" yelled Kuroppi.

"If Ouji-sama is Orochimaru, then how is she a girl?" Kiiro asked herself. "Oh! I get it! Orochimaru just poses as a guy!"

"I am not female, thank you very much," Orochimaru said, suddenly behind Kiiro. "When I created Kon-chan, my cells didn't completely replicate correctly. As you can see, she has two 'X' chromosomes instead of just one with a 'Y' added. Also, my personality changed slightly in her."

"WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON?!?" Kon yelled.

"To put it frankly, Kon-chan..." Orochimaru thought for a moment. _"I am your father!"_

"That's impossible! Noooooo!" Kiiro said, halfway between laughter and shock at the fact that _Orochimaru_ had just quoted Star Wars. Orochimaru.

Kuroppi rolled her eyes. "Kiiro, shut up. And actually, Kon-chan never knew her parents, right? So it's completly possible."

Anko nodded. "She was found a few miles out from the city and brought to the orphanage."

"What happened to the ninja from Mist?" Kiiro asked

"We're over here," Haku called. "Deciding what to do with Kabuto."

Aki was frozen, standing over Kabuto, who was twitching on the ground. "All the time I took off to find you, to repay you for what you did..." she said to herself. "And yet... here you are, almost parlyzed, and I still can't do anything. Stricken by fear..." she sighed to herself.

Haku looked at the curse mark on Kabuto's arm. "How did she do that, anyway? If Kon-san didn't know that she was Orochimaru, however that may be, how was she able to do this to this person?"

Orochimaru chuckled, appearing behind them, holding Kon's wrist (she was not pleased). "When I was still figuring out my immortality justu, I accidentally created a few new lives... Kon-chan is the one _most_ like me." He pulled her into a hug. Kon struggled, but could not get out of his grasp. "Somewhere in this pretty little head of hers, she knows all of the jutsu I had at the time. She may even have some of my memories. I'm not sure about that." He ruffled her hair. "My cute daughter."

Kon turned to face Orochimaru and, out of all things she could have done, she glared. "Let go of me," she whispered dangerously.

"That's the thing, Kon-chan. I can't. If I let go, how can I take you with me?"

Sound nin jumped out from all around them, and knocked out, then grabbed: Aki, Haku, Kiiro, Kuroppi, and Anko. Orochimaru slung Kabuto over his shoulder and all Sound related people dashed off through the woods.

T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T

When Kuroppi woke up, she was in a dark, damp, cave.

"WHERE THE HELL ARE WE?!?" her voice echoed.

"Oh, Kuro-chan! You're up!" Kiiro's voice said hyperishly.

There was silence. Then...

"How can you be cheerful at a time like this?!?"

Kiiro giggled. "I have no idea. It might have something to do with the fact that Anko-sensei has sake in her bag and now she's drunk."

"Wasssh wrong wih that?" Anko slurred.

There was a splashing noise, followed by Anko saying, "Thanks, Haku."

"Not a problem."

Kuroppi squinted in the dark, searching for her snow-white canine companion.

"Where's Fuyu?"

A barking noise sounded far away.

"We think she's being held in an adjacent cave," Aki whispered, sounding very frightened.

"Well, then," Kiiro said. "When we figure out how to dismantle that door, we can grab Fuyu and run! _And then find Kon-chan. Who isn't here either. _And then we'll run some more!"

"But how will we get out of here in the first place?" Kuroppi whispered.

A door opened in the side of the cave, letting in light that made them squint. It was Orochimaru, and behind him was Kon, who mouthed 'help me!'

"Hello," he said oddly cheerfully (which on orochimaru in insanely scary). "How is everyone today?"

"Considering my sensei was drunk a few minutes ago and I'm stuck in a cold wet cave? Very well thank you," Kiiro replied in the same evil-cheerful tone, only halfway sarcastic.

"I'm glad to hear that," Orochimaru said thoughtfully. "Anko-chan! Are you better now?"

"I think you being here makes me feel worse," Anko replied not so evenly.

"But, are you sober now?" he asked, a little less cheerfully than before, killer intent leaking off of him.

"I suppose. WHY THE HELL ARE WE HERE?!?"

"Well..." Orochimaru smiled. "I left notes at that chocolate shop, knowing Tsunade would give your and Kon-chan's team the mission, since Kiiro-chan here was raised in one and even knew the people there. Then, I had Kabuto steal the formula to draw you away from the town to a previously arrange point, so we could collect my cute daughter here." he hugged Kon, who winced considerably (poor kon-chan, I pity her so! but not enough to not keep torturing her heheh).

"I was going to dispose of you so no one knew that we had been seen, but Kon-chan said that you were her friends and that she didn't want you to die, so I let you stay here instead!"

Kiiro smiled. "Well then! We'll have to make sure your hospitality is returned a hundredfold!" she spoke in a sweet fake-polite voice, as if speaking to a small annoying younger sibling.

The Snake-Sannin chuckled at this, then noticed Kuroppi. "I doubt you'll be able to. Ah! Who have we here--- Sasuke-kun, how did you get down there?"

"I'm right behind you," said a voice from behind him, before Kuroppi could go through her usual 'NOT SASUKE!' yelling routine.

"Then who's that?" Orochimaru moved to the side to show Uchiha Sasuke Kuroppi.

HIs eyes widened. "What the--" he moved past Orochimaru to hug said Uchiha-look-alike.

"I'm not the only one," he whispered.

"That's great," Kuropppi said darkly, "Now LET ME GO."

Sasuke noticed what he was doing, then awkardly let go and stepped away.

"Who are you?" he asked.

Kuroppi glared. "Isn't it usual to give your own name before asking the other's?"

Sasuke smirked. "You were taught well."

Kuroppi continued glaring. "I'll be sure to thank Hana-neesan when I see her," she said coldly.

"Hnn... you remind me of myself, you know," Sasuke said thoughtfully.

Kuroppi said nothing, but she was kept on glaring.

Sasuke shrugged, then walked away. "I'll come back later," he called.

"Wait, Sasuke-kun!" Orochimaru left after Sasuke, dragging Kon along side him. "Help me!" she mouthed again.

"Sasuke said you remind him of himself," Kiiro chuckled. "Does he get lusted after by Neji too?"

Both girls cracked up. "But seriously," Kiiro said shakily from laughter, "We gotta get outta here. Maybe if when Sasuke-- WHO I NOW NAME UCHIHASUKE!-- comes back, we can get past him somehow."

"And we would do that, HOW?" Anko pressed.

"... No idea!" Kiiro said brightly.

"Thankfully, he didn't notice me," Haku said out of the blue.

"Why's that?" Kuroppi asked curiously.

"I fought him once. He tends to freeze up when he's scared..."

Kiiro laughed. "Scare _Uchihasuke?_ C'mon, he's lived with Orochimaru for half a year, there probably isn't much that can scare him. I mean, this is Orochimaru of the Sannin we're talking about! He's pretty creepy!"

_**"His brother..."**_ the Hokou's voice came from Aki. _**"Uchiha Itachi... HE scares Sasuke. Not that this helps."**_

"How do you know _that?_" Kuroppi asked.

_**"I keep tabs on the Uchiha clan to see if my gift has been taken care of. Ah... the Sharingan. Yes, yes... there is one thing Kuroppi might be able to do to scare Sasuke."**_

"Keep talking," Kuroppi said, nudging Aki/Hokou's body. "I wanna get out of here!"

Kiiro's eyes widened. "I think I know."

Hokou chuckled. _**"It's simple really. All we have to do is use Tsukuyoumi... an Uchiha genjutsu using the Mangenkyou Sharingan!"**_

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Banshou followed the link in her head. Honemashi did the same.

"Almost there," the small boy whispered. "Don't worry Aki, we'll save you!"

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Me: Okay, this chapter is ubershort... ah well.. oh bla dee oh bla da

Banshou (adds in): life goes on, bra! Laaa lalala life goes on...

Naruto: SASUKE STILL DOESN'T OWN ME! NOW REVIEW!

Sasuke: No matter how many times you say that, it still won't be true... dobe.


	6. Team Four's Bloody Battle

Me: I left you with a bit of a cliffie last time didn't I? ... Sorry 'bout that.

Sasuke: Why did I hug Kuroppi?

Me: re-read the chapter dumbutt.

Sasuke: smirk 'dumbutt?' Are we a fraid to swear?

Me: Nope, just too damn moral. I DON'T OWN NARUTO! Just my OC's! And the **fight scene** I'm about to do!

Kuroppi: but you can't write fight scenes!

Me: Oh, stuff a sock in it.

Banshou and Honemashi saw a tower in the distance. A musical note was displayed proudly on it.

"Sound Village," whispered Honemashi.

Banshou nodded. "Aki-chan's in there! Let's go!"

"You see, Kon-chan," Orochimaru told his daughter/clone, "Somewhere in that pretty little head of yours, you instinctively know all of my jutsu. That mark you gave my subordinate Kabuto is called a Curse Mark. With it you can bring him great power or pain, sometimes both. These things are brought to him when you leak out a little chakra and think of what you want to do to him."

Kon smirked. "So, just by thinking about it, I can cause him pain."

Orochimaru nodded. "Pretty much. Kukuku..."

"Kukuku indeed..." Kon grinned evilly.

"AUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHH!"

A scream came from the direction of the tower that Banshou and Honemashi were heading towards.

"Wow," breathed Honemashi, "And I thought that blonde girl was loud."

"Achoo!" Kiiro sneezed.

Kuroppi glared Kiiro, then looked thoughtful. "The Mangenkyou Sharingan... are you sure that'd work?"

"HEY! You're serious here?!? I DON'T WANNA DIE!" screamed the dumb blonde, rubbing her runny nose.

The Hokou chuckled. _**"I'm going to assume you're this person's closest friend. You do realize, however, that you wouldn't be dead for long?"**_

"Wha--?"

Haku nodded. "That's why I didn't want Sasuke to see me," he whispered. "He watched me die. And from what I hear he helped bury me."

"Then, how--?"

Aki/Hokou's hair became black again and Aki spoke in her normal voice.

"I was visiting Wave with my teammates on account of two missing-nin who were rumored to have fought there," she said. "I saw the graves, and we had to dig them up to make sure that the bodies had been properly destroyed."

Haku butted in. "I was in one of those graves, and I probably still would be if Honemashi hadn't seen me in his sleep."

"He's the one who dreams of the dead, correct?" Anko asked. "I think his name was in the Bingo book somewhere..."

Aki nodded. "Honemashi had seen Haku in the land of the Dead and knew his entire story. Honemashi recognized Haku from his dreams and told me, and we decided that he shouldn't have died."

"That doesn't change the fact that he was dead!" Kiiro said.

Aki smiled sadly. "I am painfully aware of this," she said, "But I have most of Hokou's powers, including the manipulation of chakra that leaks off of other Bijuu. I have discovered that using a mixture of Nibi no Nekomata's puppeteering, Kyuubi no Yoko's legendary healing, and a little bit of Rokubi no Raijuu's lightning, the dead will rise."

"A resurrection jutsu?" Kiiro gasped. "How totally awesome!"

"Yes, I know, but it has its draw backs. Considering I use chakra that come from my demon and very slowly at that, I can't do this technique very often. Also, if the body is too damaged or decayed, the jutsu will not work."

Haku looked sad. "My master, for instance, had had almost a hundred harpoons stuck into his back. Aki-san couldn't save him."

Anko raised her eyebrows. "Are you sure? There is a chance she told you a lie. If you were a missing-nin, then your master was too, right?"

"Don't say that!" Haku yelled. "If she could save people that ripped up her _brother_ would still be alive!"

"WHAT?!?" Kiiro yelled.

Aki siged. "Haku, please don't talk about it. I don't want to think about it."

"If you keep avoiding it in your head, Aki-san, it's going to get worse," Haku said pointedly.

"What happened?" Kiiro whispered, sounding afraid.

"...Mist was attacked by the Sound five years ago," Aki said quietly. "Kabuto was leading them, and for awhile it looked bad for the village. While I went to go get his scrolls, Kabuto _killed_ my brother." she looked away and stared at the wall. "I went crazy. Here, I had spent years working on my resurrections to help my precious people, and when I got to him he was to torn up for me to do _anything_." Tears came from Aki's eyes. "I let Hokou take over and I killed all of the Sound-nin that I found, overcome by rage, looking for the one who killed my brother. By the time I got there, he was at full stamina, and my body was exhausted. Against the person I needed to kill to avenge him, I was worthless."

Kabuto sneezed-- right into Kon's plate of food. Orochimaru grinned in pride at his 'daughter,' as she glared at Kabuto, and the glasses-wearing man backed away in fear holding the arm she had bitten subconciously...

"AAUUUUGGHHHHHH!"

"There it is again," Banshou said. "It's a lot louder this time, don't you think?"

"That's because we're closer, Smart One," Honemashi said darkly.

"What happened then?" Kiiro asked, shocked but morbidly curious.

"After Kabuto defeated me and stole the scroll he had come to obtain, I broke down. For awhile, I would only talk to Honemashi. He was my brother's best friend, and also the first person I ever brought back." Aki sniffed as tears fell down her face. "Why couldn't I save him? Why?"

Haku patted Aki on the back. "Hatsuharu wouldn't want you to cry," he acknowledged.

"You weren't even in Mist when it happened. How could you know?" Aki sobbed.

"Because I found Zabuza-san while I was dead, and he told me not to cry," Haku reasoned. "He was like a father to me..." Haku looked down. His eyes were wet as well.

"... I feel guilty now," Kiiro noted.

"You shouldn't have brought it up," admonished Kuroppi. "Now they're remembering all over again."

"Ohh great, rub it in why don't you," Kiiro muttered half-heartedly.

Anko grinned. "All your fault all your fault all your fault--"

"I didn't mean it literally!"

Haku looked up. "Now, to activate the Mangekyou, we first have to activate the sharingan in general..." the water on the floor that had sobered up Anko began to rise. "Kuroppi-san, try to see my movements. DEMONIC ICE MIRRORS!"

Kuroppi was suddenly surrounded by, yes-you-guessed-it, the same conformation of ice mirrors that Sasuke had been subject to about a year ago.

Haku whizzed throughout the mirrors. "Kuroppi-san, can you see me?"

"I see something... flying around... almost," Kuroppi said.

"That's good. Now keep watching."

Kiiro looked on. "WOW! What a cool jutsu! Sweet... can I learn?"

"No," Haku said. "It's part of my kekkei genkai."

"Aww! Are you sure?" Kiiro pouted.

Haku sweatdropped. "Yes, I'm sure."

"Maaan... oh well. How're you going, Kuro-chan?"

Anko laughed. "Are you that eager to die?"

"Kind of, yes. I'm sick of this place!" the blonde idiot yelled.

"You're sick of_ this_ place?" Anko laughed. "Trust me, for Orochimaru this is extremely generous."

"Wooow..." Kiiro said. "We're lucky then. I wonder what Kon-chan is doing right now..."

"And this is where I keep the torture artifacts!" Orochimaru cheered. "Would you like to take a closer look?"

Kon looked at the various spikey, twisted metal... objects and pointed at one of them. "Can I see that one?" she asked.

Orochimaru raised an eyebrow. _"That_ one? Are you sure?"

Kon nodded. Her father/self shrugged and handed her a bloodstained frying pan. "What interests you in this piece?" he cooed.

Kon twitched at the other's tone, then replied, "It looks like something my teamate had in a picture..."

"Really, now? I stole this from a kunoichi as I left Konoha." When he mentioned the name of the village he had left, he spat the word out like it tasted bitter, then smiled. "Killed her, too. Which one of your teammates had a picture of this, Kon-chan? The blonde one or the one that looked like Sasuke-kun?"

"The blonde one," Kon said curtly.

"Neeee, Anko-sensei?" Kiiro asked, while watching Kuroppi attempt to watch Haku zoom around. "Did you know my mom?"

"Not well," Anko admitted. "She was in my class in the academy, but I didn't talk to her much. I always thought she was a wierd one, though..."

"Did she really used to bash Mizuki-sensei on the head with her textbook?" Kiiro giggled.

The girl's teacher chuckled. "Yes."

"That I'd like to see... hey! If I found one of her textbooks, could I go to Mizuki-sensei's jail cell and bash him over the head with it, just for old times' sake?"

"We'd have to find your mother's textbooks first," Anko reasoned.

Kiiro nodded thoughfully. "Good point."

"What did he get in jail for anyway?" Kuroppi asked.

"He attacked that Naruto guy," Kiiro said. "Or something. I heard some geezers talking about it. They seemed angry that he got in trouble for it... geez. What'd Uzumaki do? WAIT! Uzumaki... Naruto... Naruzumaki!" Kiiro giggled. "YATTA! New nickname!"

Banshou and Honemashi slipped through the gates silently. Neither spoke as they headed towards the tower and Aki. As always, they knew where to find her. Both were silent.

Kon ran through the halls towards the prison cells, holding a large key in one hand and the same torture object from before in the other. She skidded to a stop in front of the place where a large white dog was being held.

"Let's get out of here," she whispered to Fuyu.

_"Damn straight," _was the reply.

Sasuke was on his way to visit the strange girl who looked and acted exactly like him when he saw a flash of white down the corridor. Squinting, he saw what it was.

"Kon-sama? Why are you holding a frying pan? And a key?"

"Oh _sh(eep)_," was all his master's clone/daughter said. Still holding the frying pan that she had been told was an object of torture, she ran down the hall again to another door and started unlocking it.

"You're running away?" Sasuke asked as the door opened and Kiiro's voice said, "Kon-chan! What're you doing here! Oh, look Kuro-chan, she's got Fuyu! Is this a jailbreak?"

In spite of herself, Kon sweatdropped. "Umm... yes? Now let's get out of here!" she whispered frantically.

"Ahem," Sasuke cleared his throat as Kiiro ran out and hugged Kon. "Do you really think I'm going to just let you out?"

Kiiro's eyes widened. "Damnit!" she ran back inside, only to be pushed back out by Anko. "But-- but--- the plan!" Kiiro yelled.

"Screw the plan! Let's get out fo here!" Kuroppi yelled back, coming out of the dungeon.

Kon stared at Kiiro. _"You_ have a plan?"

"No! Aki-san does! And it's a good one!"

Kuroppi rolled her eyes. "Let's leave, you two!"

"But-- but Sasuke!" Kiiro said, gesturing frantically.

"What about Sasuke?" Kuroppi challenged.

Sasuke glared at Kuroppi. "I'm not going to just let you leave," he reasoned.

Just then, Aki and Haku walked out of the cell. Sasuke's eyes widened. "YOU!"

Haku knew exactly what he had to do.

"DEMONIC ICE MIRRORS!"

"Did you just hear Haku?" Banshou asked as she knocked out a lone Oto (Sound) ninja that had tried to stop them.

Honemashi nodded. "At any rate..."

"Aki's this way!" they both said at the same time.

Kabuto walked through the halls, rubbing his curse-marked arm.

"Kon-sama needs to learn to conrtol her temper," he muttered, rounding a corner. What he saw shocked him.

Oto nin were scattered everywhere. Strange white blades where sticking out of some of them.

Kabuto bent down to pick one of. "Kimimaro?" he muttered to himself. The silver-haired man gasped.

"I must alert Orochimaru-sama!" Kabuto ran off to his master's quarters.

Sasuke was surrouned by ice mirrors.

"I don't see how that'll do any good," Kuroppi said. "I stayed in there for a few hours and nothing happened except for a slight headache."

Haku raised an eyebrow at Kuroppi, then pulled out a senbon. "I didn't throw anything at you," he justified. He threw the needles towards points on Sasuke's body that would render him unconcious.

Sasuke dodged them. Haku gasped.

"How...?"

"I've been training all these years, to defeat my brother." Sasuke said, eyes closed. "If I can defeat you, too, then it'll be an added bonus!" He opened his eyes, Sharingan activated, and began to form seals.

"Katon: Gokakyuu no jutsu!" The resulting fireball was huge, and it even weakened the mirrors. Water began to drip from them...

"We have to help him!" Kiiro said.

Aki shook her head. "This is Haku's fight."

Haku nodded from his mirrors as he strengthened them. "Please, let me defeat him."

Kiiro sighed exasperatedly. "There must be something we can--- Kon-chan, is that a frying pan you're holding?"

Kon smirked. "Yes," she said. "Orochimaru had it amoung his torture objects for some reason. It reminded me of the one your mother had in that picture of her."

"That's because it is," said Anko. "Orochimaru took it after he killed her."

"Mama's frying pan..." Kiiro said in awe. "Wow. But I was always told that Mama was killed by Kyuubi?"

"Well, then, you were told a lie. Orochimaru said he killed the kunoichi in possesion of this and took it for himself." Kon handed Kiiro the frying pan. "I think this is yours by right."

Kiiro took the cooking utensil, admiring it. "She used to bash people's heads in with this..." she whispered happily. "I was wondering where it was! I always assumed it was buried with her..."

"Apparently not," Kuroppi said. Footsteps became audible.

"Someone's coming!" Anko whispered harshly. "Get ready..."

"Kabuto's amoung them," Kon said distastefully. Then, she smirked.

"AAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHHHH!"

"Sounds like it's coming from where Aki-chan is," Banshou noted. "Honemashi, do you think maybe the person screaming is---?"

"AKI!" Honemashi gasped. "We have to run faster!"

Aki sneezed.

"Wow. So the screaming person was Kabuto?" Kiiro wondered. "Wow," she said again.

Kon nodded, grinning evilly. Just then, Anko gasped and fell to the floor, grabbing the back of her neck.

Orochimaru, Kabuto (who was barely standing), and several generic Oto-nin appeared from around the corner.

"Kon-chan, I'm yet again shocked," Orochimaru chastised. "If you keep torturing Kabuto, I'll have no choice but to inflict pain your sensei." As if on cue, Anko whimpered shakily.

Kon's eyes widened, and as they did so, Kabuto regained himself. "Thank you for listening to reason, Kon-sama."

"... Now what?" Kiiro said to Anko.

"Now we fight." Anko said, speaking to Kiiro like the idiot she was.

"... Right. I knew that!" said Kiiro unconvincingly, brandishing her frying pan. "Let's go!"

The generic Oto-nin came charging at Kiiro, Kon, Kuroppi, Aki, and Anko, but Orochimaru and Kabuto stayed back.

"Don't kill Kon-chan," Orochimaru called. "She is my daughter after all! But knock her out so she's can;t try to run away."

"Looks like your Daddy grounded you," Kiiro giggled. "Hey! Did he make you call him 'Orochichiue'?" ('chichiue; means father, so Orochichiue is a mixture of Orochimaru's name and the word for father)

Kon stared at Kiiro. "Don't give him any ideas!" she hissed as the first Oto-nin made his attack-- lunging a kunai at Anko. Of course, she dodged this easily and retaliated with her own--- and Anko's own kunai had an explosive note attached to it.

_Boom!_

More ninjas came at Kiiro, Kon, and Kuroppi, who got into a triangular formation. Kon threw senbon, Kiiro swung her frying pan, and Kuroppi just glared. The attacked ninja all shivered and tried to stay away from her. Fuyu looked at Kuroppi.

_"We're not going to get any action if you scare them all away," _the demon dog reasoned.

"True," Kuroppi agreed, forming a seal.

"Beast Clone Justu!" Two animalistic-looking Kuroppis started to attack on the Oto-nin.

Aki's hair was white and she was quite literally tearing through the enemy ranks, attempting to reach Kabuto. The silver-haired man in question only smirked as she neared him.

When Aki reached Kabuto, she came at him with a flurry or swipes with fingers that had become claws. He did nothing but dodge. Aki got fury along with Kabuto's amusement both grew.

Suddenly, something came out of nowhere and hit Kabuto in the stomache.

"Katon: Goukakyu no jutsu!" Sasuke's and Haku's strength were both wearing out. Haku restrengthened the mirror, but slower than usual. He reached for his senbon pockets--

_'I'm almost out of senbon!' _Haku though frantically. Keeping his cool, he continued to throw what he had left.

"Haku! Use this!" White spikes came flying in through a space between the mirrors. Haku dashed across the mirror chamber, grabbing the senbon of bone.

Haku smiled under his mask. "Thanks, Honemashi."

Orochimaru gasped. "Who is _that?_" He pointed at a small boy who was standing next to Haku's mirrors. He was wearing a white kimono and he had hair the color of freshly fallen snow.

"Honemashi," Aki gasped.

"What hit me?" Kabuto looked down at what had hit him to see a disembodied arm. "What the--" another arm came flying at him. Kabuto grabbed it and held it up. "Whose arm is this?" he called.

"Mine!" From the amoung the midst of the Oto-nin a girl in a brown jacket and tan pants was fighting. Both of her arms were on her body and completely intact. Kabuto looked down at the arms in his hands an noticed that they were both left arms. "How--?"

The girl in brown grabbed her left fist with her right hand and tore her own arm off. She grabbed the shoulder end and hit some of the surrounding Oto-nin with the still-close fist. The place where the arm had been moments before didn't bleed.

A new arm grew in its place.

"Banshou!" Aki said, smiling.

"We followed you because we thought you might need help!" Banshou said, whapping the torn-off fist around. "Honemashi was worried sick!"

"Aww, that's cute," Kiiro said. "Li'l Honema-chan was worried about his Neesan?"

"I am exactly three months, two day and five minutes older than Aki!" Honemashi yelled, flustered. "And I do _not_ call her 'neesan'!"

"Oh! You're just short, like Kon-chan?" Kiiro asked. Kon 'accidentally' wacked Kiiro in the forehead as she knocked out an Oto-nin.

Aki noticed that Kabuto was standing still and staring at the gril swinging her own arm around. She took the opportunity to swipe at said silver (conditioner-lacking) haired man.

Kabuto moved out of the way just in time and Aki kept making attacks.

Orochimaru yawned. Except for watching his cute daughter and Sasuke fight (not fighting each other, mind you, but fighting on opposite sides nontheless) this whole thing was rather boring.

Except for the white-haired boy. Was he a Kaguya? Maybe he didn't have the same disease as Kimimaro.

After all, the Kaguya have the most perfect bodies.

Or do they? They don't have the sharingan.

Hmmm... what if... he bred Sasuke with Karin and in the meantime took the boy's body? That could work!

Karin sneezed. _'Someone's talking about me. Is it Sasuke-kun? I hope so!'_

Sasuke randomly thought of Karin. He shuddered and then blew another fireball at Haku.

"I could use a little help!" Haku called, politely nontheless.

"Anko-sensei, may I?" Kiiro asked.

"Go ahead... we're fine!" Anko said sarcastically, out of breath.

Kiiro saw the sarcasm, but she chose to ignore it. She ran into the mirrors.

"Pretty..." she said, looking around at the many shiny objects. Sasuke punched her into one of the mirrors. She was caught by Haku.

"Focus, please," Haku said.

"Eheh. Sorry. But they're so SHINY!" Kiiro replies. "You SURE you can't teach me?"

Haku sweatdropped. "I'm sure."

"Damn..." Kiiro muttered, regaining balance to face Sasuke. "That hurt, you teme!" Kiiro stuck out her tongue and Sasuke got a good look at her for the first time.

"Naruto?!? What happened to you?"

"Who's Naruto?" the blonde girl and the Kuroppi-look-alike stared at each other.

"People confuse Kuro-chan for you, but you looks waaay different," Kiiro muttered to herself.

"Kiiro, has it occured to you that Sasuke is way out of your league and is about to kick your ass?" Kuroppi called.

"Oh. Oops. HEY! You could have told me something, bitch!"

"Whatever, klutz." Eye-rolling was evident in Kuroppi's voice. She appeared inside the mirros. "You don't even have any jutsu besides the basics. What were you thinking?"

Kiiro smirked at Kuroppi. Then, she bit her thumb and placed it on the floor. "KUCHIYOSE NO JUTSU!" (summoning jutsu!)

"Please let this work..." Kiiro said under ber breath as the smoke around her hand cleared. "Oh please oh please oh please..."

A fox, smaller than a human baby was at her fingertips.

"... KAWAII!" Kiiro glomped her summons. "I'm Kiiro! What's your name?"

"I'm Ussura and I CAN'T BREATHE! Let me go!" the chibi kitsune yelled.

Kiir grinned sheepishly. "Sorry, sorry. You're so cute I couldn't help but hug you! Could you help me out? I'm fighting the tall guy. The guy in the mirrors and the girl who looks like the tall guy (no I don't! kuroppi yelled) are my allies, so if you could not hurt them, that would be appreciated," she said poiltely.

"Tall guy in gay outfit is the enemy! Gotcha!"

Kuroppi and Kiiro giggled.

"If you think _this_ outfit is gay, you should've seen the other choices," Sasuke mumbled.

"You _chose _that outfit?" Ussura taunted.

"Shut up!" Sasuke yelled at Ussura, trying to stomp on her. Kiiro grabbed her summons just in time.

Ussura stuck out her tongue at the avenger wriggling around in Kiiro's arms. Kiiro took the hint and put her down. She ran at Sasuke, only to be smacked away.

"You hit her!" Kiiro gasped. "Teme!"

Kuroppi rolled her eyes and started forming hand seals. "Katon: Goukakyu no Jutsu!"

Sasuke dodged Kuroppi's fireball, but he wasn't able to dodge a needle Haku threw at him, which paralyzed his left arm.

The smaller and more feminine Uchiha gasped. "I saw that clearly! Do it again."

Haku threw more needles. "Again." Sasuke dodged, but Kuroppi yet again saw them clearly.

More. "Again."

More. "Try moving yourself."

Haku flashed through from one side of the chamber to the other.

"Ah-hah!" Kuroppi's eyes were red.

"Shall we commence with the plan?" Kiiro said, face paling.

Kuroppi rolled her eyes. "I can't just _kill_ you. Make it easier. Say something annoying."

"What are you talking about?" Sasuke asked, but he was ignored.

Kiiro smirked. "You're impossible to annoy."

Her friend raised an eyebrow. "How is that?" she said a little angrily.

Kiiro's grin got annoyingly huge. "Because you're so damn much like Sasuke!" she crowed."

Kuroppi glared. "I. Am. Not."

"Yessss you are! Like when the girls thought you were him and they told you it was Kiba who said you were and that they were gonna kill him you were all--" Kiiro crossed her arms and made a pissed expression. "-- _If anyone kills my nii-san, it's go to be me_," she quoted. "I mean, c'mon! You can't say you're not Sasuke, then go on and on about how you're going to kill your older brother! Even if you _are_ adopted and he's not your brother by blood."

"Kiiro! Shut. Up."

"And then when you met Itachi, he thought you were Sasuke!" Kiiro laughed like a hyena.

"You met Itachi?!?" Sasuke yelled, but he was ignored again.

"And eventually, you're gonna go blind, like Itachi who thought you were Sasuke and Sasuke who thought I was Naruto! Whoever he is," Kiiro finished.

"YOU LITTLE---!" Kuroppi shoved a kunai into Kiiro's stomache.

Kiiro smiled. _"There_ we go."

"YOU WERE _TRYING_ TO GET HER TO KILL YOU?!?" Sasuke yelled.

Kiiro nodded and, for once in this conversation, Sasuke was not ignored. "So Kuro-chan can be stronger," she explained. "The guilt, you see, it activates--"

"I don't feel guilty." Kuroppi interrupted.

Kiiro sweatdropped. "I'm dying for no reason then?"

"Yep, pretty much."

"SCREW YOU. _Cookie thief._" Kiiro spat.

Kuroppi gasped. "The cookies..."

_**(Kuro-chan flashback! Wheee!)**_

_"Who are you?" Kuroppi asked the blonde girl who was sitting on a desk, munching chocolate chip cookies from a huge bag._

_"I'm Warai Kiiro!" she said, spraying crumbs everywhere._

_Kuroppi sweatdropped, wiping cumbs off of herself. "... And you are eating in the classroom, because...?"_

_Kiiro giggled. "Ah! My aunt made them!" she said, a little sadly. "Here, have one!" the blonde girl held a cookie out to the surrogate Inuzuka._

_Kuroppi took the offered confection and took a bite. "Wow..." she said through a mouthful of cookie. It was the best thing she'd ever tasted._

_----------------------- scene break! ------------------_

_Later, at lunch, Kiiro had fallen asleep at her desk, drooling slightly. Looking around, Kuroppi saw that no one noticed her. She snuck up and gently took the bag of cookies from under Kiiro's head and walked away._

_----------------------- scene break! ------------------_

_"Where are my cookies?" Kiiro cried, tears running down her face._

_Kuroppi who sat on the other side of the classroom, turned away and quickly wiped crumbs off of her mouth._

_"My aunt made those cookies..." the small blonde sobbed. "Just before I ran away from home..."_

_Kuroppi looked down. "I... I took them..." she muttered. "I TOOK THEM!"_

_Kiiro looked up at Kuroppi. "I'm never going back there, so I'm never gonna see Fuyuki-obasan again..." Kiiro put her head on her desk and sobbed._

_"How was I supposed to have known that?!?" Kuroppi yelled. But she was crying too._

_Kiiro gave Kuroppi a watery glare. "You owe me big time."_

_**(End Kuro-chan Flashback. Awww...)**_

"Those cookies were my only link back home!" Kiiro yelled, pulling the kunai out of her stomache. "Ow..."

"Then why did you share one? And if they were so special, maybe you should've put them in a safer place!" Kuroppi thundered back.

Kiiro and Kuroppi glared at each other. Kuroppi started shaking.

"I'm... I'm sorry..." And Kuroppi fell into guilt.

Kuroppi: That was the worst fight scene I have ever read.

Me: SHUT UP!

Sasuke: She has a point there.

Me: It's people like you that make me want to torture my little brother...

Itachi: Hey that's my line!

Me: I'm the only one who's brother's forehead is pokeable! Take it away otouto!

My little brother: Neesan doesn't own Naruto-- OW STOP POKING MY FOREHEAD! --- please review!


	7. Team Four's Freedom

Guilt is a marvelous thing. It can drive a person to do the unbelievable.

Kuroppi was guilt. She had become guilt. It wrapped long tendrils around her like a giant squid and threatened to drown her sanity.

The two dots her her eyes became three, and those three dots became three slash marks.

Kuroppi looked up at Sasuke and smiled darkly.

"Mangekyou Sharingan!"

"Mangekyou Sharingan!"

The words echoes through the small hall that served as a battle field.

'Kuroppi's got the sharingan!' thought Anko. 'Now let's get the hell outta here!'

Aki sweatdropped. 'They went through with the plan even though we're already out?'

'What's going on?' was the thought going through the heads of Banshou, Kon, and pretty much everyone else except Orochimaru...

_"Why is there blood on my nice clean floor!"_

Kiiro's voice laughed weakly. "I didn't know I had so much blood... Look, Kuro-chan! I can poke my guts!" she poked at her innards, which were in danger of falling out.

"That's kinda gross," Haku said.

Kiiro poked in the wrong place-- her ruptured stomache. "AAAAH! STOMACHE ACID! IT BURNS! Kuro-chan help me!"

Kuroppi said nothing as she was in a world of her own... the way only an Uchiha can be.

The Uchiha avenger's molecules were disconnected and bits of Sasuke floated around like gas. "Where am I?"

Kuroppi's face appeared in front of him, only bigger. _"In this world, I control all things."_ The gigantic Kuro-face smirked and melted away as Sasuke felt himself become solid.

In a few second, fire surrounded him.

"I can keep this up for a pretty long time, but in the real world only a few seconds have passed," Kuroppi's voice was everywhere.

As Sasuke burned, swords and shuriken started coming at him.

"STOP!" he cried. The fire only got hotter, and the projectiles only got faster.

_"Only 59 seconds, 59 minutes and 71 hours to go."_

Sasuke slumped over, horrow etchied out on his face. Kuroppi blinked, and her sharingan deactivated.

"Everything's blurry..." she said aloud.

"It'll be like that for awhile," Haku said, "If I recall Aki-san's words correctly.

Kiiro nodded slightly and slumped over. "Damn you Kuro-chan... this hurts. Wow... so much blood..." Kiiro looked down at her bloodied fingers... "Tee hee... blood... now get me out here so I won't stay dead."

"Famous last words," Kuroppi said.

"No, these are my last words: OW!" Kiiro laughed insanely: "HAHAHA! HAHAHA! HA-"

And Kiiro was silent.

"Was she purposefully laughing like the Sicilian from 'The Princess Bride' or was I imagining things?" Honemashi said aloud.

Kuroppi sweatdropped. "Knowing Kiiro? You probably weren't."

"I need to see that movie," Banshou groaned. "Everyone keeps quoting it at me and I haven't seen it!"

With Sasuke out, Haku put his ice mirrors down and sighed. More nameless Oto-nin came at him, but Honemashi drew them all back:

"Honesenbon no jutsu!" This sent needles from his exposed chest, arms, and back in every direction (except the ones in which his comrades were).

"Such a body..." Orochimaru chuckled. "Hmm..."

The snake sennin appeared behind Honemashi. "My dear boy," he said, "Do you crave power?"

"Not really. Now let Aki and the rest of us leave." the last Kaguya glared dangerously.

"Do you really think you can scare me?" Orochimaru chuckled.

Kiiro's world was surrounded by white clouds. "This is heaven? Damn, it's pretty boring here."

"It's only boring during the day," came a voice from behind her. "We throw wild parties all night long!"

"When do you sleep?" Kiiro asked the voice sarcastically.

"Usually about right now. But I'm bored too, so I'm training. Damn! Wish I had my frying pan at times like these. But noooo, Orochi-teme just HAD to take it off hands _before_ I died. Now I don't have it!"

Kiiro whirled around. "Mama-- err Warai Mamoka?!?"

The brown-haired, blue-eyed lady giggled. "That's what they called me. Did you just call me Mama?"

"Yes, I did. Warai Kiiro at your service!" Kiiro did a mock bow. _'Okay, so I'm dead for the time being. But I have a feeling this won't be so bad.'_

"You could be the most powerful being in the world," Orochimaru chuckled. "Eternal life and youth are at your fingertips."

Honemashi turned to Banshou (who was still fighting). "Hear that Banshou? He's trying to sell me eternal youth?" When Honemashi said the phrase, 'eternal youth,' he spoke with great irony.

"HA! Good luck," Banshou sniggered.

"That's not somethng I tend to crave for," Honemashi added. "_Now let us go._"

"Okay, but all the same..." Orochimaru leaned over and bit Honemashi on the neck. "That's the earth seal."

Honemashi collapsed.

Aki/Fuyu stopped attacking Kabuto.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" And Aki charged at Orochimaru, her clothes torn and her haired mussedm the whole of her spattered with the generic Oto-nins' blood.

Orochimaru chuckled and sidestepped. "I think I'll let you go for now. But Kon-chan, Honemashi-kun, we will meet again! Kuroppi-chan too."

"Oh I'm _really_ looking forward to that!" Kuroppi said sarcastically.

"How do we know this isn't a trap?" Anko challenged.

Orochimaru chuckled. "Oh, it isn't. Why would I trap you when I can come find you anytime I want?"

"He has a point there," Banshou said, picking up Honemashi's small twitching form and promtly dumped him on Aki.

"TO MIST!" the arm-regrower announced.

Kuroppi slung Kiiro over her shoulder. "Let's get this idiot back. She'll annoy all the demons in hell."

"We're not supposed to be down here," Mamoka whispered.

"But all the _interesting_ people go to hell!" Kiiro whined. "And also I've heard the demons live here." she grinneed fanatically.

The blonde girl's mother sweatdropped. "You came here to meet demons?"

"Yep!"

"Well good luck with that." Mamoka disappeared.

Kiiro stuck her tongue out in the direction of the place her mother had been a few moments before. "Demon-hater, racist!"

Ussura appeared in front of Kiiro. "I thought you went to Heaven! You're not allowed down here."

"KAWAII!" Kiiro glomped the small kitsune. "SQUEE!"

Ussura smirked. "Yes, yes, I know I'm cute. Please leave?"

"But there's no demons up there!" Kiiro whined. "I'm not gonna be dead very long so why should I bore myself up there? I just want to meet demons because they're a higher life form and 'cause they kick ass! There's nothing wrong with wanting to meet beings you respect!"

Ussura sighed. "Well... I suppose you could meet my family. They thought it was very funny that when I finally got summoned, you died about five minutes after you summoned me." she glared.

Kiiro hung her head. "I am very sorry."

Ussura giggled. "It's okay. I thought it was funny too. I work all this time to be strong just so I can be a good summons... and then my dad places a restrictive seal on me three days before it happens! When I'm like this I can;t even breathe fire..." she made a face. "Which sucks."

Ussura stuck her tongue out and made a rasberry noise. "Thbbbb! Oh well... wanna meet them? My family?"

Kiiro gasped. "You really mean it?"

"I mean it. We kitsune haven't been summoned since before Kyuubi-ojiisan (grandpa) started acting up. Being the first kitsune summoned for the first time in three hundred years is a pretty big deal, specially becuase I was too little to be summoned back then," Ussura explained, walking down a path that had appeared out of nowhere.

"Kyuubi's your grandpa?!?" Kiiro squeaked. "HOW COOL IS THAT?!?"

"Very cool," Ussura agreed. "Okay, here's the family cave."

Two foxes the size of large stallions galloped out. "Imouto-chan! You're late for lunch!" One was dark orange and the other was almost pastel-colored.

"I was dragging Kiiro behind me," Ussura said exasperatedly. "Human's aren't the fastest runners. Kiiro, these are my brothers. They're twins. The darker one is Anzentenko-niisan and the lighter one is Tanshokutenko-niisan! But I call them the Hell Brohters because they're the brothers from hell."

"We _live_ in hell," Tanshokutenko said, sweetdropping.

"So that makes you the sister from Hell," Anzentenko chuckled.

"... Good point," Ussuara said. "Good point. Anyway, this is Kiiro! And she summoned me."

"--When I was alive about an hour ago." Kiiro interjected.

"Your dying act was to summon this brat?" Anzentenko chuckled.

"Yep! Isn't it awesome?"

A deep rumbling voice answered Kiiro's hypothetical question. _**"If it means we kistune will be summoned again... then yes."**_

Kiiro gasped. "Who said that?!?" she said, spinning around.

_**"My name is Inari no Kitsune. You summoned my daughter, and from my knowledge I know that you will not be here in Hell for long."**_

The blonde girl faced the cave to see to red eyes gleaming. "Hai, Inari-sama! That's the general idea. Unless they were lying to me. Which I doubt."

_**"Well then..."**_ Inari chuckled._** "I don't suppose you could summon the rest of us in the future? This place gets really old after awhile..."**_

Kiiro gasped, then smiled. "As soon as I develop enough chakra, I will!"

"Excellent," said Anzenteko. "Terrorizing damned souls is getting old."

"Still pretty fun though," Tanshokutenko pointed out.

"Yeah," Anzentenko agreed. "You're right. It'll never get old. But variety would be appreciated. Can we chase around people who bug you? Chasing is good. We promise not to hurt anyone!"

Anzentenko lowered himself so his head was lower than Kiiro's and made puppy dog eyes.

"How can I resist that face?" Kiiro said, making the average 'squee' expression. She then chuckled. "And during a fight? Feel free to hurt the enemy. Same for the rest of you guys."

The twin foxes cheered and danced around, whooping and cantering around in a circle.

"He's just letting us go?" Kon whispered as she and Anko walked out of the Otogakure gates.

"Looks like it. But he's probably gonna capture you again," Anko said, grinning evilly. "It's times like this I'm glad he rejected me."

"Lucky," Kon grumbled.

"C'mon! _I've got a dead body bigger than I am over my shoulder and I'm still faster than you!_" Kuroppi called from up the road, where she was walking with Banshou and Aki (who was carrying Honemashi).

"I bet she went to hell just to see the demons," Kon chuckled.

"Yup! Probably," Anko agreed.

Aki sweatdropped. "Is she really that obsessed with demons?"

"Oh yes," Kuroppi said. "She's sewing Bijuu plushies."

_**"Has she sewn one of me yet?" **_ the Hokou's voice asked.

"I think so. She was sewing them by number of tails in decending order. Last time I went to her house, she was almost done sewing the Rokubi (six-tails)."

_**"If she's sewn one of me, I want to see it." **_Aki's face grinned, then smiled softly. "I'd like to see it too," Aki admitted in her normal voice, embarassed.

"Then there's the whole nicknaming thing. The only ones she says she'll never nickname are demons and Kages. I think she holds them at the same level," Anko said, sweatdropping.

Kuroppi shook her head. "No, she holds demons _higher_. That's why she thinks the Yondaime (Fourth) sealed the Kyuubi somewhere instead of killing it. She says if it's sealed insiode a person she will hug that person and 'maybe some of Kyuubi-sama's awesomeness will rub off on her'."

Aki sweatdropped. "Didn't the Kyuubi attack Konoha?"

Kon nodded. "She says that's 'really awesome.' Then she rants about how she was born a year too late or she would've been born on the same day of the attack and then she'll start ranting about something irrelevant like her dad or her dead brother."

Aki stopped. "Dead brother?"

"Five minutes older, born dead. She never even met him," Anko said through her teeth.

"Say, Kiiro-chan, how is your brother?" Mamoka asked curiously. Kiiro was not supposed to have been in Hell, so some Seraphim had (forcefully) pulled her out.

Kiiro spit out the drink. "Mama, my brother was _born dead._ Shouldn't _I_ be asking _you?_"

Mamoka stared at her daughter. "Kiiro-chan, dearie, if your brother was born dead he'd have been born _silent._ And trust me, he wasn't." she covered her ears for emphasis. She screwed her eyes shut tight. "And neither were you."

"Well, then, I haven't seen him. Maybe he died after you did?" Kiiro suggested. "Mayb it was so horrible that Fuyuki-obasan wouldn't want to tell me."

Mamoka nodded. "That sounds like my sister, all right. I'm surprised she let you become a ninja! I mean, you do look a lot like me. Okay, sort of like me. You look more like your dad..."

"Speaking of which, who was he? Fuyuki-obasan won't tell me that either!" Kiiro made a face.

"We've been over this before," Mamoka said, grinning evilly, "If they won't tell you then neither will I."

"Whyyyy nooooot?"

"Because I so love watching you squirm!"

Aki stopped. "It's getting late," she said, pointing ahead to the lights of a town. "We should rest over there for the night."

"Good idea," Anko agreed. "Listening to the Kaguya boy's whining is getting annoying."

Honemashi glared. "Have you any idea how painful this curse mark is?"

Anko glared back. "For your information, I do." Anko pulled the collar of her shirt down a little so that they could see the mark on the back of her neck.

Honemashi gasped. "I had no idea..." he said.

"Does it really hurt that much?" Kon asked curiously.

"Yes."

Kon looked up thoughtfully. "I wonder..."

"Don't. Even. Go. There," Anko said.

Kon smirked. "I was joking. Do you really think I'm _that_ much like him?"

Anko looked away.

"Enjoy your stay," said the maid as she closed the door behind the group. The room was in the traditional Japanese style, with tamami mats on the floor and a brush painting of some girls in Kimono on one wall.

Kuroppi sat Kiiro's corpse (which she told registration was not dead but asleep) against the wall, and Aki set Honemashi down on the couch. He winced and rubbed his neck.

Anko stared. "How are you able to keep concious?"

Banshou giggled. "Because he's kickbutt!"

"Not that it doesn't hurt a helluva lot," Honemashi muttered.

"Just don't activate your chakra," Anko advised. "Then it'll hurt a helluva lot more."

Honemashi groaned. "How do I make it go away?"

"You can't," Anko sighed, "But we can get the seal repressed so that it only activates of you tell it to."

"How?" Kon asked curiously.

"Well, it includes a lot of seals and a lot of pain." At the word 'pain,' Anko grinned sadistically. "Of course, Honemashi, the sooner it's done the better."

Honemashi looked suspiciously at Anko. "Are you it's neccesary or are you just the sort of person who enjoys causing others unneccessary pain?"

"Both. Definitely both," Kon and Kuroppi spoke in monotone.

"I see." Honemashi sighed. "Let's get this over with..."

Anko smirked. "First, remove your shirt."

"... ARE YOU SURE THAT'S NECCESSARY?!?" Honemashi yelled frantically.

The Oro-reject glared. "If I had to and I'm a _girl_, then you have to."

Honemashi sat on the floor, surrounded by seals.

"Okay, here we go. Just for the record, this'll hurt almost as much as getting the mark in the first place." Team Four's sensei smiled sadistically. "Shall we?"

"I don't have much of a choice, do I?" the Kaguya boy muttered. "Let's go."

Anko bit her thumb...

"Wait!" Kuroppi said. "I have an idea!"

"What?" Anko asked, put out because she had been about to put a small child into a world of physical discomfort. (err maybe she's more like her sensei than she lets on...)

"If I use Tsukuyoumi on him while this process happens, then he won't have to feel any pain," the surrogate Inzuka pointed out. "Then he won't scream and no one will run in and think we're doing some creepy religious ritual or working for Orochimaru or both."

"You do have a point there..." Anko sighed.

Kuroppi sat down near Honemashi. "Look into my eyes... Mangekyou Sharingan! Tsukuyoumi!"

Honemashi was, strangely, in the middle of what looked like an academy classroom.

"Where exactly am I?" he called out, knowing Kuroppi would hear him. Said Uchiha appeared in front of him with a puff of smoke.

"You're in the academy classroom. Sorry but this was the first place I thought of. Or would you prefer the muted-color void I used to torture Sasuke?" she raised her eyebrows.

"No, I'm fine," Honemashi said, sweatdropping. Kuroppi shrugged and went to sit down in one of the seats.

"I sat here," she said thoughtfully. "Kiiro sat next to me. Kon sat on the other side of Kiiro. If I remember right, the academy teacher made Anko-sensei sit in the back somewhere so he had less chances of being hit by the explosive kunai she threw everywhere."

Honemashi chuckled. "That sounds like her, all right."

"Damn Uchiha," Anko muttered under her breath, "I wanted to see the Kaguya pretty-boy shriek..." she but her thumb and put it over Honemashi curse mark. The seals on the floor around him all flew to surround the mark and seal it away.

"Done," Anko said proudly. "Kuroppi, you can undo your genjutsu now."

Kuroppi said nothing.

"KUROPPI?!?"

"Maybe you should just tell her you like her," Kuroppi suggested, sitting on a desk, her legs swinging back and forth casually.

"It's not that simple," Honemashi groaned, slumping in the chair he was sitting in. "With my condition, you see..." he trailed off.

"Hmmm..." Kuroppi thought. "But she doesn't think of you like the way people do because of your condition, does she? She instated it after all. That would be sad."

"That's the problem. I don't know!" Honemashi yelled, face red. "I just don't know."

"Well, that certainly explains why Orochimaru's proposition didn't seem to tempt you."

"Yep," Honemashi agreed, "Because if I work for Orochimaru, I won't be of any use to her."

Kuroppi furrowed her brow. "Wait a sec, I'm getting a message from outside." she closed her eyes and scrunched them tight, then after a moment reopened them. "Anko-sensei's done and your body stopped jerking. You're all right now."

"Why would my body have been jerking?" Honemashi asked, sweatdropping. "I feel no pain."

"Technically your body _was_ in pain. I just made your brain think it wasn't," Kuroppi explained.

"Oh, okay. That makes sense."

Kuroppi put on a calm expression. "Well, Honemashi, I'm glad we had this talk." she said, sounding very like a psychiatrist.

Honemashi rolled his eyes, chuckling. "Me too, Kuroppi, me too."

Kuroppi smiled."Ready?"

Honemashi nodded, and the Tsukuyoumi session ended.

Aki smiled. "Tomorrow, we reach Mist and your friend will be no longer dead."

Kon stared at Aki. "Remind me why we can't just revive her here?"

Haku spoke for the first time in three hours. "The jutsu is very taxing on Aki-san's body," he said. "She'll be unconcious for at least three days. Knowing this, the people she chooses to save are generally taken to Mist where she can become incapacitated with less chances of someone attacking her. If we revived Kiiro in Konoha, then the council might use her fainting as grounds for war."

Honemashi sighed. "They hate her for Hokou, but they can't afford to lose what they consider such a valuable tool."

"In addition, when Kiiro wakes up, she'll be very stiff from being dead," Aki added. "I have herbs at home which will speed up her returning to her normal state."

"That makes sense," Kon reasoned.

The Konoha-nin all nodded (because the three Kiri-nin aka Mist-nin and the one Suna or Sand-nin already knew this so they didn't have to nod).

The next morning, Aki was the first to rise. She got up, showered and got dressed. When that was done, she pulled out a scroll and unsealed a bag of rice and a rice cooker.

She plugged the rice cooker into the wall and filled it with water and rice, humming to herself.

The smell of rice cooking woke up Banshou, Kon, Kuroppi, and Haku.

"I brought the soy sauce this time," Aki said, "But I forgot the seasoning."

"I packed seasoning," Haku offered, pulling a small container of Furikake flakes out of his kunai holster.

"And they were in your weapons bag, how?" Banshou asked, raising her eyebrows.

"I didn't have enough room in my bag," Haku said.

Anko yawned and sat up. "If all else fails, he can sprinkle them in someone's eyes."

Everyone laughed at this.

"We're gonna get to Mist today. Will someone wake up Honemashi? I'm not doing it," Banshou said.

Everyone laughed at this as well.

Kiiro smirked. Sneaking into Hell from Heaven was awfully easy... and vice-versa. The Guardian Angels who monitored the border were _way_ too lax on Casual Dress days.

"There you are!" Honemashi's voice growled. "Why are you sneaking from Hell into Heaven?"

"Because when the Guardian Angels find me in Hell they first constric my chakra momentarily and then bring me back up here anyway," Kiiro muttered. "I just wanted to visit my summons and her family, who are maybe future summons. What's wrong with that?"

"You're not a cursed soul. You don't belong in Hell," Honemashi said exasperatedly.

"I know that! Why are you here anyway?!?"

"Your body reaches Mist today so you should start syaing your goodbyes..." Honemashi shrugged.

Three guard angels ran up to Honemashi and hugged him. Since it was casual dress day, they were all wearing floral print Hawaiian shirts with cargo shorts. "You're taking her away?" they asked hopefully. "They make our job so hard!"

"Yeah, Aki's bringing her back today," Honemashi said, "So you don't have to worry about that."

"I better go tell Mom!" Kiiro said. "Last time she couldn't find me she was as worried as--- wait they're not worried down there! Just demonic or a cursed soul who did something bad! But she was worried, anyway."

"You're mom's that-a-way, continuing the search for your brother," one of the Guardian Angels said roughly as all three let go of Honemashi. He sounded as if he thought this was silly.

"What do you know about him that makes you use that tone?" Kiiro asked skeptically.

"You're brother's not dead, Kiiro. You'll probably meet him at some point," another Guardian Angel chuckled.

Kiiro grinned. "I gotta go tell mom!" she ran off in the direction that the angels had said her mom was.

"Kiiro, wait!" Honemashi ran after her. "I need to explain the resurrection process so you undestand what's happening!"

"Mist is only ten, eleven miles from here," Aki said conversationally as all eight shinobi (one dead and carried by Kuroppi, one asleep and carried by Aki) walked down the dusty forest path. "We'll get there soon."

"Aren't we slowing whatever your mission was by having you do this?" Anko said. "Your mission should come first."

"It did. Our mission was to find out more about Otogakure," Haku said, "Which I warrant we did. Possibly more than we wanted to know, with things like exactly what it's like insdie that cell." He smiled.

"Definitely going to be good information though," Aki said. "For instance, we know that he's probably going to be keeping an eye on Kon-- no offense meant."

"No offense taken," Kon said. "I kinda got off easy there, didn't I?"

"What exactly were you doing?"

"Orochimaru showed me around, explained some of his jutsu, tried to get Sasuke to say more than 'hnn,' and had me watch him torture some people," Kon said, "No big deal. Did you know that rubber spatulas are excellent for slapping people with?"

"You tortured people?" Anko gasped. Maybe Kon was turning into her father!

"Just Kabuto," Kon said. "Metal spatulas work well to. But with rubber ones you get this excellent wet 'thunk' sounds along with the screamed of pain..."

Aki grinned. "I'm glad to hear that."

"You should be. Kabuto's a pervert," Kon said.

"Did he assault you?" Kuroppi laughed.

Kon smirked in a way that might remind one of her father. "I don't think he would dare mess with his boss's daughter, do you?" she said creepily, obviously imitating Orochimaru.

Anko raised her eyebrows. "You can never tell with Kabuto... maybe if you steal his conditioner he won't try anything." The six ninja that were alive and awake laughed.

Kabuto rubbed at his recently sealed-off curse mark absently. There was something different about that girl...

Kon sneezed.

"Maybe Kabuto was talking about how pretty you are," Anko taunted.

Kon gave her sensei one of her better death glares. "STOP THAT!" she yelled.

Kiiro furrowed her brow. "So, pretty much, when I'm resurrected I'll be asleep for a few days then stiff for a week?"

"Maybe two," Honemashi said. "But it's better than staying dead isn't it?"

"Hellz yeah."

"I think I see it!" Banshou called down to her comrades below. She was sitting high up in a tree, looking to see is Mist Village was visible yet. "See that big grey thing in the distance?"

"I can see it," Kuroppi said, "But only with my Sharingan."

Anko sighed. "How far? Once we get Kiiro there I need to take Kon back to see Hokage-sama about the whole daughter-clone thing."

"Not too far. An hour or so if we run!" Banshou leaped from her tree and onto the ground, starting to run. "Let's go!"

Kuroppi re-adjusted the blonde girl slung over her shoulder and ran after the arm-regenerator. The others followed close behind.

The gates were made of a slick grey stone, polished a hundred times over and gleaming slightly in the sun.

"Here we are," Aki panted, stopping her run. "Kirigakure: The Village Hidden in the Mist."

Me: I tried to be more descriptive... did I do okay, Kuro-chan?

Kuro: We'll see.

Kiiro: REVIEW! I'm almost not dead anymore! (does a dance) Being dead is so boring!


	8. Team Four's Blondie Lives Again!

Me: Mya haha! I can't stop writing... it's too addictive! ... Myahaha!

Kuroppi: Just shut up and write the chapter.

Kon: No! Don't!

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Aki approached the gates and knocked loudly. "Himura Aki, Kaguya Honemashi, and Haku!"

One of the guards atop the wall laughed at this. "We're not letting you in you demon--" there was a smacking noise.

"Let my students in or you die," a gruff voice boomed out.

"Thanks, Natsu-sensei," Honemashi laughed as the gates opened.

A man in his early twenties leaned over the wall. "Welcome back you three! I'm glad no one's dead this time..." his eyes twinkled.

Aki, Honemashi and Haku chuckled.

"Oh, wait! We DO have a dead person!" the man realized. "And Banshou too! Come in, everyone in!"

Aki, Haku, Honemashi, Kon, Kuroppi (carrying Kiiro), Fuyu, and Anko all walked in quickly. The gates slammed shut behind them.

Aki's sensei jumped down off the wall and landed with a loud 'THUD' sound.

"Pleased to meet you all," he said jovially. "I'm Natsu and I'm the jounin sensei of this cell-- Honemashi, Aki, and Haku's been working with us too recently."

Anko bobbed her head in recognition. "I've heard of you before. My name is Mitarashi Anko and these are my students. Hebitsukai Kon--" Kon waved-- "Inuzuka Kuroppi and Fuyu--" Kuroppi nodded, Fuyu barked-- "And the dead girl is Warai Kiiro." Anko pointed at said corpse.

"This way, please. We need to resurrect her before the council figures out I'm back and decides that what I'm doing is wrong," Aki said tiredly, turned right and walking off. Everyone followed.

Natsu spoke up. "Banshou, we got a message from Suna. Your team has a mission... you should probably go."

Banshou made a face. "Rats! Yeah, I'd better leave. Bye guys!" she made way for the gate.

"Say hi to Daidaiiro for me, willya?" Natsu called after her. "Chippoke too!"

"I will!" Banshou called back. The gate opened again and Banshou walked out.

"Was Banshou dead once too?" Kuroppi asked.

"Yes, she was. Actually, I believe she was killed by her crush, wasn't she?" Honemashi said.

"She was," Aki agreed. "And she still likes him."

"She still likes him?" Kuroppi said in disbelief.

Honemashi nodded. "I was killed by a relative when the Kaguya clan went beserk and started killing each other off. I don't feel any more ill will towards that person than towards the rest."

"And Kiiro was killed by her friend, but if I know Kiiro she's probably just gonna use it as an excuse for you to buy her dango," Kon pointed out.

"Being dead is an eye-opening experience," Haku agreed.

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Aki stopped in front of an apartment. "Here we are," she said, smiling a little. "Come in, why don't you?"

She unlocked the door and everyone walked in. It was a two-bedroom apartment, Aki explained, and she had shared it with her brother, but now that her brother was dead no one entered his room. Aki didn't live with her parents as they considered her a monster, she had added quietly.

"Put Kiiro on the couch," Aki said. "The sooner, the better. Fresher bodies are easier to work with."

"I'm sorry," Haku joked.

Aki laughed quietly. "Haku had been dead for three months," she explained.

Aki pulled on the light switch. The walls were dark blue, and the carpet was a lighter blue, like ice.

"Lay Kiiro on the couch, back up" Aki instructed Kuroppi, walking into the kitchen to retrieve some herbs from a little box on the counter.

Kuroppi nodded and placed Kiiro on the couch. Aki came back out of the kitchen. She put a few herb in Kiiro's mouth. "To help her breath," Aki explained. "Now, let's get started..."

Her hair turned white and Hokou took over.

Anko ran to hide behind Kon, who sweatdropped.

"Don't tell me I scare you," the five-tailed demon chuckled.

"I won't tell you," Anko said quickly.

The Hokou chuckled again, then closed Aki's eyes and took a deep breath and laid her right hand on Kiiro's back. A red chakra glowed around the hand.

"Healing chakra sucked off Kyuubi," she explained to those who hadn't seen this process before.

Hokou held Aki's left hand above Kiiro's back. "Raijuu's lighting." A miniature thunderbolt struck Kiiro.

The hand stayed up, but the lighting ceased. Black chakra lines came out of Aki's fingers and moved all pver Kiiro's body, then went to the place where the right hand was still healing.

"Nekomata's ability to manipulate the dead. I do most of the healing above the heart, because it's the hard to animate," Hokou said conversationally. "Of course there's this lovely gaping hole in her stomache, too. Did you have to do that, Kuroppi? You could have just hit her head."

"I didn't want to kill her at first, so she provoked me. And I got mad," Kuroppi said gruffly. "So it's not my fault."

Aki's body smiled at Kuroppi's comment and shook her head. "Now, we use the chakra string to start the heart beating..." The finger started making jerking movements. "Ah. And now for the breath."

The right hand stopped glowing and was used to turn over Kiiro's body. The place where Kuroppi had stabbed was healed completely without as much as a scar. Of course, there was a magnificent hole in Kiiro's shirt around her stomache.

Aki's hair returned to it's normal color. "This part is simple and I can do it myself-- Shukaku's use of the wind element." With the right hand she opened Kiiro's mouth, then blasted wind in through the mouth, through the wind pipe, and through the lungs.

She detached the chakra strings on her left hand and used both hands to push on Kiiro's stomache five times.

Kiiro coughed. And spluttered.

Aki gently put her fingers Kiiro's belly and and started to tickle her.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHA! STOP THAT!" Kiiro laughed. She sat up and opened her eyes.

"I'm going to assume you're alive?" Aki said.

"DAMN STRAIGHT! Thanks for sending Honemashi to tell me by the way. Hell, thanks for everything!"

"Good..." Aki mumbled. "Because I'm just about spent." She fainted.

Honemashi appeared behind her just as she fell and caught her. Aki's head landed on Honemashi's shoulder, right next to his face. He blushed.

Kuroppi smirked.

"Kuro-chan? Guess what?" Kiiro asked, crossing one leg over the other.

"What, klutz?" Kuroppi asked.

"I SAW MY MOM!" the demon-obsessor squealed.

"No way!" Anko said loudly. "You saw Mamoka-chan?"

"I did! I did!" Kiiro replied excitedly. "She's the coolest mom EVER! We went looking for my brother but she didn't even know he was dead and even though we got Yondaime-sama and Sandaime-sama to help, we still couldn't find my niichan!" she made a face. "I think he's not dead."

"Ah... maybe your brother went to Hell?" Haku asked.

Kiiro sweatdropped. "Why would they send a baby to Hell?"

The mist-nin shrugged. "They sent Zabuza-san to Hell and he didn't do that much that was wrong. I had to sneak into there to see him."

"Didn't do that much wrong?" Anko asked, sweat-dropping. She was ignored.

"You snuck into Hell too? Was it through the hole in the wall?" Kiiro asked quickly. "The one shaped--"

"-- Like a rabbit," Haku agreed.

"Rabbit hole!" Kiiro squealed. She jumped up and got into a pose as to start bouncing up and down--

"Oof." she fell backwards, back onto the couch. "I'm all stiff from being dead."

"That'll keep for awhile," Haku sighed. "You'll have to stay here a week or so."

"Oooooh," Kiiro said. "That makes sense."

"Well, if that's all..." Anko interjected, "I need to take Kon to see Tsunade-sama."

Kiiro nodded. "For the whole oh-yeah-she's-Roro-chan's-daughter thing?"

"Roro-chan?" Anko laughed. "Even Orochimaru gets a nickname?"

"All humans besides the 'Kages do," was Kiiro's response. "And I realize now that I haven't nicknamed my senseis either..."

"Technically, his _is_ a Kage," Anko pointed out, chuckling. "Hehe... 'Roro-chan'... he has that one coming."

"Yeah, he did. And since he's Micheal Jackson crossed with Voldemort he doesn't count as a Kage."

This made sense, so everyone nodded.

"Well, we'll be leaving now. Toodles!" Anko called, dragging Kon with her. "Come back to Konoha eventually!"

Kuroppi sweatdropped. "Kii-chan?"

"Yeah?" Kiiro asked, hearing her nickname.

"I think she's trying to turn us into missing-nin." Kuroppi said.

"Probably."

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"Achoo!"

"Anko-sensei, are you coming down with something?"

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Aki sat up in her bed.

"Oh, you're up!" Kiiro cheered, passing by the door. She was still wearing the same shirt Kuroppi had killed her in... there was a huge hole in the stomache lined with bloodstains.

The junchuuriki nodded groggily. "How long was I out?"

"Three days. Want some food?"

Aki's stomache grumbled loudly. "Yeah... but Kiiro, you shouldn't be up and about. Aren't you still stiff?"

Kiiro nodded. "Even so, I can't help but be my hyper bouncing self!"

"She's fainted from exhastion three times," Kuroppi called from... wherever she was.

"We had the same problem with Banshou. She jumped up and down a lot too," Honemashi noted as he stepped into Aki's room. "She really wanted to go home."

"Too see her crush who killed her?" Kiiro giggled.

"Yep. Pretty much." the Kaguya boy nodded.

"Hey... I just realized something." Kiiro said suddenly. "About the resurrections."

Aki looked up. "What is it?"

"Well, I was dead, right?"

"You were..." Honemashi said.

Kiiro nodded. "And now I'm not, right?"

Aki sweatdropped. "You noticed this just now?"

"SO, if I _was_ dead but now I'm _not_ dead but I've still _been_ dead before, doesn't that make me _un_dead?"

"Technically..." Aki said.

"So me, Honema-chan, Haku-chan, Ban-chan, and any other people you've helped in this way are zombies!!!" Kiiro squealed. "And since you made us zombies you're the Zombie Lord!"

"Zombie Lord?" Aki asked.

"It is true we are indebted to you, Aki-san," agreed Haku as he passed through the hallway, carrying a basket of laundry.

Aki sweatdropped. "Haku, why are you doing the laundry?"

Haku smiled politely. "Oh, these are only my things. I can get yours too if you like--"

Aki shook her head. "Just because I resurrected you doesn't mean you're my slave or something. You really should go and do something besides helping me with your life."

"But since without you I wouldn't have a life, shouldn't I repay you in any way I can?" Haku pointed out, confused.

"No!" Aki said. "I want you to go back to life like it was before-- _that's the whole point of bringing you back!!!_" she yelled angrily. She realized something and hung her head. "But you can't-- I forgot-- I'm sorry," she said sadly. "Forgive me for blowing up at you. I just wish you wouldn't keep helping me all the time like this. You're not my subordinate or something, ya know."

"I'm confused now," Kiiro said. "Dare I ask what's going on?"

Haku smiled sadly. "Well, as you know, Aki-san couldn't save Zabuza-san..."

_**(Start Haku Flashback)**_

__Haku coughed and sat up. "Where am I?" he gasped. He was in the middle of a forest. There was a small white-haired boy and a black-haired girl who was a little younger than him kneeling next to him. The black-haired girl seemed to be asleep on the white-haired boy's shoulder.

"As I explained when you were still dead," said the white-haired boy, "I'm Honemashi and this girl here is Aki. Aki brought you back because she thought you shouldn't have died. Your master, she didn't think should have died either, but with the extent of his wounds she couldn't help him, so we redug his grave. You're in Wave Country, about three miles from the Great Naruto Bridge."

Haku gasped. "Great _Naruto_--?"

Honemashi nodded. "Yep. They named it after that Konoha-nin you fought because he brought hope back to the villagers."

Haku smiled weakly. "I'm sure he appreciated that."

"From what I hear, he did," Honemashi said, standing up and picking up Aki bridal style. "Since you were dead, you'll be stiff for quite awhile..."

"Wait!" Haku winced and slowly got up.

"What?" Honemashi asked tiredly.

"I owe you both. Is there anything I can assist you with...?"

"That's right. You don't have anywhere to go..." Honemashi noted. "Well, if I were you I'd go out and 'seek your fortune' of something, but if you wanna come with me and Aki, then I'm not gonna stop you." the Kaguya boy walked off and Haku, after thinking for a moment, stiffly followed after.

_**(End Haku Flashback)**_

__"I'd lived a majority of my life serving Zabuza-san. Without Zabuza-san I decided to serve Aki-san," Haku explained.

"... You need to get a life. No offense," Kiiro said.

"I agree with her whole-heartedly," Honemashi said.

Haku smiled embarrassedly. "I know..."

"That's it!" Kiiro yelled. "Haku!" she addressed the feminine boy.

"Yes?" Haku asked, nervous at Kiiro's determined tone.

The summoner-wannabe grinned. "I make this pledge: As long as I'm here in Mist, I'm gonna teach you to get a life of your own! Because you suck at teaching yourself." she nodded to herself. "Mmm-hmmm."

"That's not the nicest thing to say..." Aki said, sweatdropping.

"You're a lot like that Naruto boy," Haku told her. "Actually, now that I think of it, he's also a Konoha-nin. Do you have a relative named Uzumaki Naruto...?"

Kiiro made a face. "No, I've never met him, but I hear a helluva lot about him from Kuro-chan's adoptive brother, Kiba. _Kiiro, you look just like him! If we cut your hair you'd be his twin! Have you been to Ichiraku lately, Kiiruto?_" she made an exaggerated anger face, complete with wide eyes and clawed hands. "When I finally meet that guy I'm gonna drag him to wherever Ki_baka_ happens to be and _show_ him we're _nothing_ alike!!!" she fumed. "That teme..."

_'No doubt about it,' _Haku thought. _'She's almost _exactly_ like Naruto.' _"Sorry, my bad," Haku said hurriedly.

"That why I think it's so funny when people take Kuro-chan for Uchihasuke," Kiiro said. "Because it's happening to someone besides me. Also, since Sasuke has fangirls, they sometimes mistake her for him and chase him around Konoha." she grinned evilly. "Plus she's got fanboys of her own. Poor, dear, Kuro-chan..."

"So that's why you're always making 'Uchiha' cracks about me," Kuroppi said, also walking into the room. "By the way, you guys really should check out the TV... the Chuunin exams are on." she walked you quickly. "That Banshou girl is fighting."

"Ban-chan?!?" Kiiro yelped, running out to the living room.

_The ring was round like a stadium, with sand on the floor. There was ring of sharp-looking rock around the edges and several doors were on the walls past the rocks. One of the doors was open and several Chuunin hopefuls were watching through one of the doors._

_"This match's winner: Kasshokusuna no Banshou!" exclaimed the examination's proctor. This was a guy wearing what looked to be a pair of black pajamas, with a matching hat with cat ears on it. Banshou was on the TV, waving happily at the cameras. There were disembodied arms and legs all around her (they were, of course, her own)._

"She WON!" Kiiro hooted.

_On the TV, Banshou walked off of the arena. She ran and glomped some guy who was standing in the competitor's area. He looked at her for a second, then shrugged and let her hang off the back of his neck. The boy had red hair and pale skin..._

"That's Gaara," Aki said, "The guy who killed her, but she still likes him. He's the Fourth Kazekage's son, actually. The proctor is Gaara's brother, Kankurou."

"Kankurou has problems," Honemashi added for good measure. Aki nodded.

_"Gaara just let Banshou hand from his neck. Kankurou sweatdropped at this scene, then cleared his throat. "Ahem! Next: Akasuna no Daidaiiro versus Hebitsukai Kon!"_

"OUJI-SAMA'S IN THE CHUUNIN EXAMS?!?" Kiiro and Kuroppi yelled in unison.

_Kon's opponent was a boy with wavy orange-red hair (more red than orange) wearing a blue shirt with black pants. His Suna hitai-ate was tied around his right arm and he had black fingerless gloves. In addition, there was a belt full of scrolls around his waist. The boy was wearing the standard black shinobi sandals like most Suna-nin wore._

_"My name's Akasuna no Daidaiiro!" said the boy cheerfully as he and Kon stepped into the ring and faced each other. "... Hey shrimp! Are you male or female?" _

_Kon twitched._

"That's Banshou's teammate," Haku informed the others.

"He also has problems," Honemashi added, "Because he was taught for awhile by Kankurou."

_"Oi! Daidaiiro! If you don't win I'm flat broke!" Kankurou threatened the orange-haired boy._

_"Don't worry, Kankurou-san, if I'm fighting this inhuman she-male then that's not a problem."_

_Kankurou grinned. "Good kid."_

_"GO DAIDAI!" Banshou yelled, from her position of still-hugging-Gaara, "But BE CAREFUL! I met that girl before and she's trouble!"_

_Kon gave Banshou a 'speak-one-more-word-and-you-die' glare, but Banshou payed this no mind. "Remember! If you win you're fighting ME!"_

_"So it's all downhill from here?" Daidaiiro teased._

_"We'll see," Kon and Banshou said, neither amused by the comment._

_"You guys ready?" Kankurou asked. Daidaiiro put his hand on one of the scrolls on his belt and Kon formed a seal with her hands._

_"MATCH COMMENCE!"_

Aki laughed softly. "Kankurou's really into this job, isn't he?"

"I think you're right," Honemashi agreed readily.

TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT.TT

Me: HA! I wrote the chapter Kon-chan!

Kiiro: And there's nothing you can do about it!

Kon: I hate you both...

Me: pats Kiiro's head _good _self insertion. I should probably go write my Host Club fic now...

Kon: Which I'm not in! Take your time.

Kuroppi: But you're about to fight Daidaiiro!

Kon: Oh yeah... snigger I'm so gonna kick his ass... review people! And maybe I'll get to do it sooner!

Me: Remember, I don't own Naruto! Sasuke does!

Sasuke: Damn staight.


	9. Team Four: Karaoke and Chuunin Exams

Me: Here's chappy 9! I had a lotta fun riting this one.

Kiiro: Remember, Kishimoto (and Sasuke) owns Naruto. Kuro-chan is based off a real person, who owns Aki. Shashuko owns me, Banshou, Daidaiiro, Honemashi, Kon-chan, and a Haku voodoo doll. That's it.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

_Daidaiiro pulled out a scroll and put his hand over it. Two puppets came out: they looked like a giant rat and a six-foot-tall man with shaggy brown hair. "Welcome to my puppet show! It's the end of the exams for you."_

_Kon glared at Daidaiiro, but she stood stock-still, waiting for him to make his first move._

_"By the way, you never answered my question. Are you a guy or a girl?"_

_Kon reached into her pouch and threw senbon at Daidaiiro. The giant rat puppet moved to block it._

_"Be careful, she-male, Nezumi is the fastest puppet owned by a non-missing-nin."_

_Kon smirked. "Well, then! Sen'eijashu!" A horde of snakes came out of Kon's arms and slammed Nezumi into the wall. "Since he's so fast, he must be light! And therefore weak!" She swung her arm and the snakes slammed the puppet into the other wall. The force of the impact jarred the arms of the puppet off..._

"Hey, isn't that one of Anko-sensei's techniques?" Kiiro pointed out. "The one she always surprised us with in the morning?"

"She must've taught it to Ouji-sama for the exams," Kuroppi reasoned.

Honemashi stared at Kuroppi. "In a week?"

"Well, Ouji-sama here had the best learning ability in our class, so why not?" Kiiro pointed out. "She probably learned it on the trip over! ... Where are they again?"

"They're in Suna, you idiot," Kuroppi said. "That's why a _Suna-nin_ is commentating!"

"... I knew that!"

_The other puppet ran at Kon, who raised an eyebrow. It moved to crush her with his fist--_

_And went right through a basic clone._

_"Huh! Where'd she go?" Daidaiiro said, looking around him to find nothing. Kon's voice echoes through the stands._

_"A puppeteer is always open... and he controls his puppets with his fingers." Kon shot out of the ground and struck Daidaiiro's left wrist with the back of her hand. The man puppet went flat._

_Daidaiiro reached for another scroll, quick as lighting._

_Kon was quicker. She grabbed all of Daidaiiro's scrolls, faded out, and reappeared twenty feet away._

_The puppet user smiled to himself and used chakra strings to open the scrolls._

"Using chakra strings to open a scroll? I didn't even know that was possible!" Kiiro gasped.

"Daidaiiro's clan, the Akasuna, make the all of the puppets in Suna, too," Haku told Kiiro.

"They have problems," Honemashi added.

_Out of the scrolls popped nearly fifty puppets._

_"You're dead," Daidaiiro informed Kon softly, yet in a playful tone. _

_The puppets lunged towards Kon altogether. She began doging._

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

Kon swerved around a puppet with swords for arms. _'There's something very strange about this,' _she thought. _'They're moving almost as if it's to a rythm...'_

She looked at Daidaiiro's hands and saw that his eyes were half-closed and he was humming as she moved his fingers up and down very quickly. He also moved his hands from side to side as he made the finger-twitching movements.

_'Like he's playing a piano...' _Kon mused to herself. _'WAIT! That's it!'Now, what song is he playing?'_

She focused her chakra into her ears and listened as intetly as she could without getting hit by the puppets swinging various light and sharp or heavy and blunt objects at her. She heard these notes:

E, E, F, G, G, F, E, D, C, C, D, E, E, D D;

E, E, F, G, G, F, E, D, C, C, D, E, D, C, C.

"Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, Ode to Joy?" Kon chuckled.

Daidaiiro's eyes widened, and he smirked. "So you've figured me out," he chuckled. "Do you know this one?"

The puppet came at Kon faster and she continues to dodge.

"Judging by the speed of the puppets moving and your finger movements... the 'Pirates of the Carribean' theme?" Kon asked, smirking and shaking her head.

"Yep, you guessed it. Here's one you probably don't know!" Daidaiiro moved his finger faster and faster.

"Flight of the Bumblebee?" Kon asked, continuign to dodge of course.

"Wow, you are good. Oh, well, I'll just have to up the tempo!" The puppets attacking Kuroppi accelated at an alarming rate.

Kon rolled her eyes. "This is getting old. Sen'ei Ta-Jashu!" Snakes came out of her sleeves again, but this time, there were at least ten times more. They moved to create a dome around her, which compacted tightly, the flung out in all directions.

The puppets were all thrown into the rocks surrounding the arena. A good deal of them were smashed and Kon's snakes dissappeared.

Daidaiiro rolled his eyes. "I can still use them when they're cracked you know," he said impatiently.

Kon smirked. "Can you, now?" Daidaiiro narrowed his eyes and tried to move his fingers to pick up his puppets.

His eyes widened. "What the---?" his jaw stiffened and was unmovable. _'I can't move anything!'_

"When I threw those senbon, I used some chakra string of my own to send one around that puppet you used to block. I pricked you so quickly you didn't bleed or even feel it," Kon explained, smirking. "My senbon are all coated with a meek paralyzing potion. It'll wear off in half an hour, but if I intended to kill you or to run away, I would find no resistance on your fight. I've won. By the way---"

She disappeared, then appeared behind him and smack him upside the head. He was sent flying ten meters into the air. "--- I'm not a she-male, nor am I male in anyway. I'm a girl."

Daidaiiro came down hard, making a soft 'thud' sound when he hit the sand on the ground.

Kankurou glared at the victor. "THIS MATCH'S VICTOR IS HEBITSUKAI KON!" he boomed into the megaphone he was holding. He turned it off and made a face at Kon.

"I lost my bet," he complained, "How was I supposed to know you'd beat my student?" The cat-boy turned his megaphone back on. "THIS CONCLUDES THIS ROUND OF THE CHUUNIN EXAMS THIRD TRIAL, THE TOURNAMENT! THE NEXT SET OF MATCHES WILL TAKE PLACE IN TWO DAYS' TIME!!!" He smiled at the croud and made a victory or peace sign. "BE SURE TO WATCH!"

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"The v for victory sign..." Kuroppi noted. "The hyperness and the general volume... he reminds me of Kiiro."

"Then she had problems too," Honemashi supplied.

Kiiro chuckled. "Yes, I do. I'm kind of proud of it, actually."

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

Orochimaru chuckled and turned off his TV.

"Kukuku... our Kon-chan is becoming quite the prodigy, don't you think?"

Kabuto nodded. "She's brilliant."

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"HAHAHAHA-HA!" laughed a certain pyromaniac blonde. "Of course your cousin would be beaten by someone who so looks like Orochimaru, un. Right, Sasori no Danna?"

Sasori shrugged (or, rather, Hiruko, which he was inside of, shrugged). "Daidaiiro was always an idiot," he said, "Just like you, Deidara."

"HEY, un! Take that back!"

"... No."

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

**"Ribon wo misunde... waratte mitara**

** Kawatta watashi ni, ageta ki gashi ta**

** Chiisana yuuki ga, jishin ni naru--" **Kiiro sang into the microphone.

"That... song..." Kuroppi said. "Isn't that that one song you sing to torture Kon-chan?"

"...Why are we here again?" Honemashi asked, sweatdropping.

Aki, Kiiro, Kuroppi, Fuyu, Honemashi, and Haku were in a small room at a Karaoke place.

Kiiro stopped the music player and refrained form singing the song (which made Kon very relieved).

"Well, I vowed I'd show Haku how to have fun! Well, how to get a life, techinically. So, I said, 'Why don't we go to a karaoke bar?' And Aki-sama was all, 'Sure, why not? I know a good place,' and so we all followed her here and payed for a room and then I started singing the-song-I-was-singing-before-I-was-so-rudely-interrupted!" she said the last part more looudly than usual, glaring at Kuroppi.

Kuroppi stared at her. "Okayyy... but does anyone besides you want to sing? Ever think of that?"

"Ummm..." Kiiro looked away, then turned back to Kuroppi and YELLED, "HEY! I was just going first because Aki-sama suggested after everyone kinda just sat here awkwardly for so long!"

"Why do you call me -sama?" Aki asked, sweatdropping.

Kiiro grinned. "Because you saved my life! Don't worry, I won't become your zombie-slave or anything... even if you ask very nicely."

Aki chuckled. "That's good to hear."

"If you want, I can get you a better nickname later, but I can't think of anything right now. Unless you wanna be Akkii... which I doubt, considering the way those gaurdsmen treated you. OH! You could be Acchan," Kiiro offered.

"... I liked Aki-sama better," Aki said.

"Good! Akkii and Acchan are harder to say. After all, a good nickname is a delicate balance if cuteness and easy-to-say-ness, sometimes a dash of humor. For instance, Kuro-chan's brother Kiba is Kibaka, because he's an idiot."

Kuroppi smirked. "He is. He really is."

"Well, I'm NOT singing," Honemashi said.

Kiiro shrugged. "Then who will?"

Silince reigned.

"I know!" Kiiro giggled. "We could dare each other to sing something! Honema-chan, you're singing _'Can't Touch This'_."

"I am not," Honemashi said. "I refuse to sing."

Haku spoke. "... If I sing 'Barbie Girl,' will you do it?"

Honemashi stared at Haku, and then, out of the blue, he started laughing.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay, I'll do it -HAHAHA- after you go," Honemashi said weakly, continuing to guffaw uncontrollably.

"Honema-chan laughing?" Kiiro furrowed her brows. "That's kinda creepy. Probably the creepiest thing I've ever seen."

Kuroppi shook her head. "Have you ever seen Kiba-niisan's teammate Shino laugh?"

"Shino's_ capable _of laughter?" Kiiro asked, astounded. "I thought he was schizophrenic."

Both Konoha-nin laughed as well.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

_"OH, Ken! I'm having so much fun!" _said Haku in a girly voice.

"Nice job, Haku!" Kiiro applauded with the rest, who were all laughing. "Okay, Honema-chan, he did it, now you have to sing too."

"Still no." Honemashi shook his head.

"Honemashi," Aki said, "You promised you'd sing this time."

"That was three years ago! And I only said I'd do it the next time back then because Hatsuharu threatened to--"

Aki's expression soften and her eyes got big and watery. She was in no way acting. "You'd go against a promise made to Niisan? The request he ever made to anyone?" she gasped.

"AHHH! I didn't mean it that way!" Honemashi mumbled. "Okay, I'll sing."

Kuroppi grinned evilly at Honemashi, then told the karaoke machine to do the song 'Can't Touch This.' Kiiro immediately started singing along to the background music.

Honemashi glared at her. "You're not making this any easier, you know."

The blonde kunoichi nodded smugly. "And _that,_ my dear Honema-chan, is exactly the point of singing the beat in the first place."

Honemashi rolled his eyes.

_"Can't touch this," _he started.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"Well sung, Honemashi," Kuroppi said, smirking. "Don't you agree... Aki-chan?"

Aki chuckled. "That was... FUNNY..."

Honemashi blushed and looked away. "My turn to dare someone, right?"

"Yeah..." Haku said. "But since I sang before you, you can't dare me."

Honemashi nodded. "Hmm... Aki?"

"Yes?" Aki asked.

"The Llama Song."

Aki started laughing. "Nooooo!" she said. "... Oh well. Okay."

She took a deep breath. _"Here's a llama, there's a llama, and another little llama--"_

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"Hahahahahahahaha!" Aki laughed. "It's been so long since I sang that one..."

"Really?" Kiiro asked. "How come?"

"It was Hatsuharu's favorite song," Honemashi explained. "He would sing it with this high-pitched, nasal voice..." he broke down laughing. "Don't even get me started on his version of Numa Numa!"

Kiiro giggled. "Well,_ I_ know who to look for next time I die."

Honemashi shook his head. "Hatsuharu was a good kid. Too good, in fact. He became a guardian angel, but I'm not sure where he's working. They won't tell me," he said quietly.

"Wow," Kiiro said. "Not being able to find your friend? Now that really sucks."

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"A-CHOOOO!" cried one Uzumaki Naruto.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"It does suck," Honemashi agreed, "It really does. Hey, Aki?"

"Yes?" Aki asked, looking at Honemashi. "What is it?"

"Your turn to dare someone."

Aki smiled and Houkou took over. Her face grinned evilly. "_**Kuroppi-san!**_"

"Ohhh, great," Kuroppi said, "What is it?"

"_**You have fanboys in Konoha, correct?**_"

Kuroppi groaned. "And I hate them SO MUCH!"

"_**Well, then.**_" Aki's hair faded back to its natural dark color. "Sing 'Fergalicious'."

Kiiro started up the machine, giggling. "Go for it Kuro-chan!"

Kuroppi glared at Kiiro. "You realize you're singing next, right?"

Kiiro grinned and nodded. "And that's your cue. SING! Errr, RAP!"

The Uchiha-turned-Inuzuka contemplated killing Kiiro, again, but thought the better of it because Aki might just bring her back again.

_"Fergalicious definition, make them boys go loco._

_ They want my treasures so they get their pleasures from my photo_

_ You can see me, you can squeeze me I am easy I am sleazy..."_

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"_Fergalicious,_" Kuroppi finished.

Kiiro was on the floor, laughing like crazy. "If only Neji could see you now... I need to get a camera."

"And so do I," challenged Kuroppi, "Because you're about to sing 'Wannabe'."

Kiiro shook her head. "That song's a duet."

"I know," Kuroppi said, grinning evilly. "Someone else sang a duet by themself tonight, too..."

"Oh, it's okay then," Kiiro said.

"... SO Haku is going to sing it with you," Kuroppi finished. "Haku?"

Haku laughed. "How can I say no with that evidence against me?"

Aki pressed the button to started the music.

Kiiro turned to Haku.

"_YO,_ I'll tellyouwhatIwant, what I reallyreallywant-"

"-So _tell_ me what you want, what you reallyreallywant," Haku sang back.

"I wanna-- _huh!_ I wanna huh! I wanna _huh!_ I wanna _huh!_ I wanna reallyreallyreallywanna zigazig_ aaaahh..._" Kiiro chose to ignore the implications of this song, since it was pretty obvious to her that Haku didn't like girls.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

Kiiro and Haku bowed at the end of their performance.

"That was... creepy," Honemashi said.

"I'm gonna go get a glass of water," said Aki, getting up and walking towards the door. "Anyone coming with?"

"I'm coming," Honemashi said quickly following her out.

Kuroppi grinned evilly and went after the two.

Kiiro and Haku were alone in the room.

"Well sung!" Kiiro said, holding up her hand for a high-five.

"Yeah..." Haku agreed, "But that was... awkward."

Kiiro shook her head. "I sing that song in the shower sometimes. Why should it be any different singing it in front of four of my friends?"

Haku smiled and nodded. "I suppose you have a point there..." He trailed off, staring at the stucco ceiling.

Silence reigned. Kiiro absentmindedly reached over and ran her hand through Haku's hair, causing Haku to suck in his breath and reasonably stiffen.

"No fair," she mumbled, "How come a guy has better hair then me? Longer too," she added.

"Umm... thank you?" Haku said nervously. "I'm thinking of getting it cut, though."

Kiiro gasped. "Why on earth would you do a thing like that? I'd kill ANYONE to have your hair!"

Haku shrugged. "Girls," he explained. "They think it's weird. After they think I'm one of them."

"Oh..." said Kiiro. "Wait-- GIRLS? I THOUGHT YOU WERE GAY!!!" she yelled.

"That's the other reason..." Haku mumbled.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"I THOUGHT YOU WERE GAY!!!" Kiiro's voice was audible from inside the girls' bathroom.

"I knew it," Kuroppi said, smirking. "Aki, pay up."

Aki fished inside her pockets and brought out the equivalent of five bucks.

Handing it to Kuroppi, she said, "Poor Haku. Kiiro's awfully clueless."

"So are you," Kuroppi pointed out.

Aki furrowed her eyebrows. "I am?"

Kuroppi nodded. "I feel bad for Honemashi."

"...Me, too," Aki agreed readily.

Kuroppi raised her eyebrows. "You _know?_"

The houkou jinchuuriki laughed. " How could I not have noticed it by now? It must really stink being stuck as an eight-year-old all your life. It's all my fault too... because I didn't revive him right. Not enogh of Raijuu's lightning."

"That's not what I was referring to," Kuroppi said.

"Really?" Aki asked. "What is it that's bugging him, then? Is it something I can help with?"

Kuroppi broke down laughing.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

Haku and Kiiro were sitting next to each other on the couch.

"So... you're straight? As in liking girls?" Kiiro asked.

Haku sweatdropped. "Yes," he said. "Well... not girls in general. Just one girl in particular."

"Aren't people our age a little young for those kinds of feelings?" Kiiro pointed. "No offense. I mean, I'm twelve, and you can't be much older than I am!" she laughed.

"Actually, I'm fifteen," Haku supplied. "And... I only started thinking about those sorts of things recently. Am I too young?"

Kiiro giggled. "I suppose not then. Yeah, you're old enough..." she made a face. "Saku-sempai and Oni-sempai the Uchihasuke fangirls --err, you don't know them I think, their real names are Sakura and Ino the Uchiha Sasuke fangirls-- they're not. But they're, like, obsessed with their SASUKE-LOVE, or whatever they think it is. But really they're just bratty little teenagers with crushes on the popular kid," she said. "Makes me kinda sick."

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"A-CHOO!" Ino and Sakura sneezed-- right into Nara Shikamaru's food.

"Troublesome," Shikamaru muttered, picking up a peice of snot-covered sushi, shrugging, and eating it anyway.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

"Bye Honema-chan, Aki-sama, Haa-kun!" Kiiro waved frantically as she and Kuroppi walked out through the gates of Kirigakure. "Thanks for saving my life and all that kinda stuff! Write us or I send Ussura after you!"

The small fox following Kiiro nipped at her heels. "Show your summons more respect!" she muttered. Kiiro stuttered her apology to the Kyuubi's descendant.

"Goodbye and good riddance!!!" Honemashi called from atop the Kiri wall.

"Love you too," Kuroppi yelled back at him sarcastically. "Thanks for the scroll, Houkou, Aki!" she held up a summoning scroll so the others could see it. "I'll be sure to give the Inuzuka head your letter, too!"

_**"The least I can do for someone who shows my daughter such kindness," **_Houkou's voice floated over their heads. _**"Don't summon the one called Yukito when Fuyu's in a three-kilometer vincinity of you. You're not the only one with fanboys."**_

"I'll remember that. Fanboys are evil," Kuroppi said, shivering.

_"That's why I find it so funny when they chase you," _Fuyu said. _"Because they're chasing someone who isn't ME."_

"Write us when you get there! Tell us what's up!" Aki yelled after then retreating Konoha-nin.

"We will!" Kiiro yelled back.

"Hey, where did Haku go?" Honemashi asked Aki. "I could've sworn he was here a second ago."

"I have no idea," Aki answered.

"Kiiro! WAIT UP!"

"Haa-kun?" Kiiro turned around to face Haku. "What is it?"

"Just..." Haku blushed. "Err... have a safe journey."

"Oh, stop stalling and ask her out already," laughed a voice from behind him.

Haku froze and his face turned a bright red color that would make Hinata proud. "Who's there?"

It was Banshou. "It's me! I've got a scroll on the subject of the Fifth Kazekage." she said slyly, holding up a scroll.

"They finally named a Godaime?" Kuroppi asked, curious. "Who was it?"

"It's..." Banshou screwed her faced up happily. "... GAARA! GAARA'S GONNA BE KAZEKAGE!"

"I don't know Gaara but--- YAY! Good for you, Ban-chan!" Kiiro ran up and hugged Banshou. "Write me, okay? I gotta go now. No more stiffness!"

Kiiro ran down the road, dragging Kuroppi behind her.

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

**(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )(o )**

Me: wow... I really didn't know how to end this chapter.

Haku: she thought I was gay... (sulk)

Kiiro: no, I know better now! remember?

Haku: Right... sniff oh well. I wonder what happens the next chapter.

Me: Say it, Naruto.

Naruto: NO.

Me: Do it or I unlock Sasuke.

Sasuke (in cage): Narutoooo you shall be MINE!

Naruto: Definitely no then.

Sasuke (no longer in cage): (runs and glomps Naruto)

Kuroppi: Next time... I'm related to that weirdo? (points at Sasuke, who is currently harassing a certain blonde jinchuuriki, who might I add is not Yugiito)

Kiiro: Sasuke? Yep. But we won't know _how_ until the next chapter. Next time in Anko Plus Gennin Equals: Pure Chaos! I'll definitely kick some ass!

Kon: (in her own happy little world) ... I beat Daidaiiro... heh. Oh, right! Review.


	10. Team Four and FILLER!

Me: Sorry, I haven't posted in awhile. Computer wouldn't talk to that sucks, but still I think getting a new one was a bit extreme.

Me: ... But it's an iMac!

Kon: You IDIOT.

Me: I hate you all. Except Kiiro.

Kiiro: But I'm a self insertion. Hating me would be hating yourself!

Me: not completely. I've never called Haku gay.

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Kuroppi, Kiiro, Anko, and Kon were all in the Hokage's office.

"On the subject of Kon's origin..." Tsunade sighed. "If I know Orochimaru, which I'm not sure I do anymore, but I probably still know him better than most, he'll try to get Kon again."

Kon paled.

"If this happens..." Tsunade said, "I want you to play along and pretend to enjoy his company. Obtain as much information as you possibly can. Then, when you get the chance, escape and tell us everything you know. I suppose you could call this an extended mission, S-Class."

"Whoo..." Kiiro said. "S-ranker! S-ranker! Kon-chan has mad skillz."

"Thank you," Kon said to Kiiro, smirking evilly, "I know."

Tsunade took a deep breath. "On the subject of Kuroppi being an Uchiha..." she paused. "We're giving you guys a mission. It's simply to clean up the Uchiha complex, which Sasuke never did. But, I also want you to find out who Kuroppi's birth parents are if you can. Knowing exactly which part of the Uchiha clan she came from might be... advantageous."

"She's probably twins with Sasuke," Kiiro teased her teammate.

"I'm a year younger than him and I have a different birthday, dumbass," was Kuroppi's response to this remark. "There's no way I could be his twin. For all we know, the relation between me and him is very distant."

"But at any rate, he's not the only one," Kiiro said, mimicking Sasuke. All of Team Four laughed at this, leaving Tsunade looking very confused.

"I don't get it..." she said slowly.

"Trust me," Kiiro chuckled, "You don't wanna know."

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"Here we are!" Anko boomed. "The Uchiha complex."

"I ended up here by accident once," Kuroppi said off-handedly.

"Did the Uchihas rag on you?" Anko asked.

"I was there. There was only one Uchiha present," Kiiro recalled. "It was Itachi... and... HE THOUGHT SHE WAS SASUKE!!!" she fell over with a laughing seizure, but then stopped when she saw something on the walls of one of the complex buildings.

"Is that... bloodstains?" she asked, walking over and looking at the wall, which was smeared with something rust-colored. "It is!" Kiiro cheered.

"Wow, when Tsunade-sama said that Sasuke didn't do any cleaning, she wasn't joking," Kon noted. "Should we get started with the insides of the houses and do that part later?"

"Sounds good," Kuroppi said, walking over to open the sliding door of one of the houses. "Let's do this one first."

Anko nodded and pulled out a sealing scroll and 'poofed' out some rags and two bucket full of soapy water. "The sooner we start, the sooner we finish! Let's go!"

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"Whew!" Kuroppi wiped some sweat off her brow before proceeding to spray more cleaner into the mildew-covered wall. "And to think that civilains do this stuff all the time?"

"I was raised by civilians!" called Kiiro, running around the room while pushing a mop. "Just do the cleaning fast and consider it training! That was you feel less like you're wasting time," she huffed, setting down the mop, and picking up a strangely shaped scrubbing brush and a canister of cleaning powder.

"I'll clean the toilets!!!" she cheered, running for the bathroom. "That's the best part!"

"How is she enjoying this?" Anko grumbled from the kitchen, where she and Kon were scrubbing the floors.

"Well, maybe she's reminiscing about her childhood," Kon reasoned.

"No," Kuroppi said, "I think..."

"HA!" Kiiro called. "I've done all the cleaning except for you guys' job in less than three hours! BEAT THAT, SUCKERS!!!"

"... She's just glad that she can think she's better than us in one area at least," Kuroppi finished, smirking.

"Damn straight!" Kiiro hooted, coming back in with the toilet scrubber and putting it back with the cleaning pile. "I'm feeding my superioirity complex."

"Actually, I think you're overstuffing it," Kon said darkly. "If you're so good at this stuff, why don't you help over here?"

"Good idea!" Kiiro said, skipping over to the kitchen to grab a rag and start cheerily scrubbing the floor.

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"Okay, guys," Anko said, addressing her students, who were sitting on the porch of one of the Uchiha houses and eating dango. "We're pretty much done with the cleaning, and there's only one house left."

"The lair of the beast..." Kiiro said creepily.

Anko nodded. "The house Sasuke lived in with his brother and parents when they were all alive, -slash-not-Missing-nin. Once we've cleaned that place up, we can start looking for records of little girls who disappeared, AKA Kuro-chan's birth parents and name if she had one."

"Oh yeah..." Kuroppi noted. "Kuroppi might not be my real name..."

"_Which is why it's time for me to come clean,_" said a dark figure from atop one of the telephone poles.

"Who's that up there?" Kon asked suspiciously.

The figure jumped down: Uchiha Itachi. He turned to Kuroppi and locked eyes.

"NOT SASUKE!!!" Kuroppi yelled immediately. Kiiro started laughing.

Itachi smirked. "Oh, I've figured that out by now," he chuckled. "You see, Sasuke lacks hatred. But you, my friend, have _too much. _Also you're too pretty to be Sasuke."

"Thank you, I know." Kuroppi said, smirking back.

"You're welcome," Itachi said. "But I'm not here to discuss who has more hatred. ...Well, not just to discuss who has more hatred. But, to the point, exactly who you are."

"... And you know this, when even I don't, how?" Kuroppi questioned, glaring.

"Because..." Itachi sighed. "I was the one who, knowing that the two clans will avoid each other at all costs, left on the Inuzuka's doorstep. Instead of killing you, might I add, like I was planning to do to all the others."

"You were planning to kill them already when I was a baby...?" Kuroppi asked. "But weren't you, like, six years old?"

"Seven," Itachi replied curtly. "I was seven."

"Oh, that makes it okay, then," Kuroppi growled sarcastically. "Anything particular reason it was me, out of all the babies there may have been at this point in time...?"

Itachi sighed. "I was afraid of you asking this. It's because," he mumbled, looking away, "Because you're my baby sister."

Kuroppi's left eye started twitching. "Okay... WHAT?!?"

"It's true," Itachi said, "You were born Uchiha Reiko to Uchiha Fugaku and Mikoto, your brothers being myself and Sasuke."

Kiiro started laughing. "Well, that makes sense!" she chortled.

"Now that I think of it..." Kon noted, "She looks more like Itachi then she looks like Sasuke."

"Exactly," Itachi stressed. "Would you be able to kill something that looked to much like you? That's why I couldn't kill her, or Sasuke either."

"Being their older sibling and therefore bound to protect them has nothing to do with it?" Kiiro said exasperatedly. "Geesh. I'm the only living child of my parents that I know of and _I_ know that," she muttered.

Itachi glared. "That has nothing to do with it..."

Kuroppi gasped and got teary-eyed. What Itachi didn't know was that this was the act she put on whenever Kiba said something 'mean' to her or wouldn't do her a favour. It usually-- no, always worked.

"Niichan? Are you saying you don't love me?" she whispered, using every once of pretend-weepiness that she had built up over the years.

"Well... that might have had something to do with it." Itachi said, his face softening.

Itachi's face went back to its more well-known emotionless expression. "In addition, I was never here. You all were hallucinating." he walked up to Kuroppi (AKA Reiko) and hugged her swiftly.

"We'll meet again... imouto-chan," he whispered in her ear. And just like that, the man Kiiro had dubbed 'Uchitachi' disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

No one spoke for the rest of the next minute. Every stood there, taking in the implications of the last sentence Itachi had said before he left.

Kiiro, as usual, was the one to break the silence.

"That means the house we're about to do is the one Kuro-chan was raised in!"

Kuroppi smirked. "You're right..." she opened the door and walked inside. Her teammates and sensei followed, immediately noticing the stench in the air.

"I think Sasuke left food out before he left," Kon gagged, holding her nose.

"Spoken as someone who's never changed a daiper," Kiiro said cheerfully, walking into the kitchen. "Ah! It's onigiri... _really old _onigiri."

"Now that I think of it," Kuroppi thought aloud, "Kiba-niisan said something about that before. Onigiri is the only thing he's ever seen Sasuke eat."

"You mean he can't eat anything else?" Kiiro asked, confused.

"Well..." Kuroppi shook her head. "Probably something more along the lines of, he can't _make_ anything else." This made everyone laugh.

"So?" Kiiro asked, once the laughter had died down. "You always pack steak in your lunch. Can't _you_ make anything else?"

Kuroppi shot her blonde teammate the famous Uchiha glare, accompanies with the Inuzuka sneer. "Sure I can. Microwave popcorn, cold cereal, oatmeal, raw fish, sandwiches, eggs, and... onigiri."

Kiiro and Anko cracked up.

Kon smirked. "Onigiri must be a family favorite," she remarked, chuckling.

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"All done cleaning!" Kiiro cheered. "Now let's go look for proof that Itachi wasn't lying!"

"Like what?" Anko asked.

"Like these," Kon said, holding up a box with the words 'Uchiha Mikoto's Home Videos-- Open at your own peril' written across it.

Kuroppi grinned evilly. "This outta be_ fun..."_

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On the screen, a small baby girl crawled across.

_"Look at the camera, Reiko-chan! Look at me!" A woman's voice said off-screen. "Look, Fugaku! She's crawling to her niichan!"_

_"She is?" Uchiha Itachi (age six) looked up from the book he was reading (it was titled 'Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban')._

_"No, not you, Itachi-kun, I meant Sasuke." The woman explained. Sasuke (age one and a half) was sitting against the couch, playing with a giant plush shuriken. _

"Wait, THAT Uchiha Mikoto?" Kiiro gasped, hugging the Nibi no Nekomata (the two-tails) plushie she was holding close. "I met her when I was dead!"

Kon raised her eyebrows. "What's she like?"

Kiiro giggled. "Really perky. Maybe even more so than me."

"Now that I think of it, she was on Kiiro's mom's gennin team," Anko noted. "They were friends."

"Would you shut up?" Kuroppi glared at Kiiro and Anko. "I'm trying to watch!"

_The little girl (Kuroppi, aka Uchiha Reiko, age 3 months) crawled up to Sasuke and started crying._

_"What did you do?" Itachi yelled, jumping up and sweeping Kuroppi/Reiko away (how'd he manage this at the age of six? he's a prodigy, stupid) from Sasuke. The little girl giggled, and Itachi almost smiled at her (ALMOST), then set her back down._

_She crawled right back to Sasuke and started crying again._

"Wow..." Kiiro marvelled. "You were evil, even at this age?"

Kuroppi shrugged. "My mom, meaning Inuzuka Tsume, my adopted mom, has tapes of me doing exactly the same thing with Hana-neechan and Kiba-niichan when I was a little older. Watch, I'll repeat this cycle a couple more times until someone else intervenes."

_Yet again, Itachi picked up Reiko/Kuroppi and put her down far away from Sasuke._

_She crawled right back to Sasuke and continues wailing._

"I think this is enough proof to show the Council who she is without telling them Itachi was here," Anko chuckled, "Especially if we show them the ones taken by Tsume-san as well.

Kuroppi smirked. "And something tells me Hana-neechan will get a kick out of this tape. ... Even though she was the one I'd cry near."

Kiiro furrowed her eyebrows. "Why aren't we gonna tell 'em about Itachi showing up again?"

"_For the last time,_ we're telling _Hokage-sama,_ in secret, that we saw Itachi, but not the council, because they'll put it in their records, and Sasuke might find it," Kon explained tiredly. "And if either Sasuke or Itachi dies the council finds a reason and comes down on our heads for killing one of a dying clan which they want to continue to live in Konoha."

"Who would they want to find a reason to come down on us?" Kiiro asked, squeezing her bijuu plushie.

"Because we consist of a demon-obsessor," Kon said, (pointing at Kiiro), "Orochimaru's former student," (she pointed at Anko), "And me. His _'daughter'_."

"Now that I think of it, random old people we pass in the street have been glaring at us more than usual recently," Kiiro noted. "And technically, Kon-chan, you're not his daughter, you're _him. _Just mutated a little so you're girl and not supertall."

_"Stop calling me short!"_ Kon punched Kiiro into a wall.

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_"Oo you think I'm in love, And sent from above? I'm not that innocent!"_

Kon stopped singing and turned the music player off in one fluid motion. "Why _that _song of all songs?"

"Because you hit me," Kiiro said immaturely, sticking out her tongue. "Next time I dare you it'll be Paula Abdul's 'Cold Hearted Snake.' Now dare someone else, and it can't be me since I dared _you _haha." she grinned cheekily.

The non-senseis of teams Anko, Kurenai, and Gai were all playing the Karaoke Dares game that Kiiro had invented in Mist. Team Kurenai was there because Kiba made them go, and Team Gai had been dragged there by Neji.

Kon's eyes scanned the book. She very slowly, but very eerily.

"Hyuuga Neeeejiiiiii ..." she said in her very creepiest voice. "_Somebody to Love. _Queen. Shino will do backup."

Neji paled under Kon's glare. "R-right." Shakily, he stood up and walked up to the stage. Shino followed him, but it was hard to tell if he was scared or not, since his face and eyes were hidden.

Neji cleared his throat. _"Won't anybody? Fiiind meeeeee, Somebody tooooo-"_

Shino cut in. _"Looooooove."_

The room shook with laughter. Except Hinata, shook her head to herself. _'Neji-niisan already has this song on CD in his room...'_

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At the end of the song, everyone cheered and clapped and laughed all at once as Neji (who was still shaking under Kon's glare) and Shino (who was smirking) got off the stage.

"But that song doesn't fit Shii-sempai (Shino) at all!" Kiiro said, confused.

Kon rolled her eyes. "Isn't that what made it funny?"

Kiiro nodded, her face dawnig with understanding. "You're right..."

"Ahem," Neji said. "My turn to dare someone."

Everyone grew quiet as Neji's gaze fell on Kuroppi.

"Kuro-sama will be singing..."

"Something racy and frilly and girly, so you can imagine she's singing it to you?" Kiba said tauntingly.

The branch house prodigy smirked. "Good idea, Inuzuka."

"Niiiiisaaaaan," Kuroppi and Hinata muttered under their breaths simultaneously. "You idiot."

"As I was saying..." Neji said. "Kuro-sama will be singing 'Tell Me What You See.'"

"As in 'when you look at me' or the Beatles' song?" Kiiro asked.

"The Beatles?" Neji's voice and face were confused. "Are they a band? I've never heard of them."

Kiiro gasped. "Hyuuji-sempai really _is_ an idiot after all!"

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"That was an interesting round of Karaoke," Kon mused, walking down the street. "Whoever thought Aburame Shino could sing so well?"

"Yeah, he's shy about that," Kiba laughed, grinning evilly. "We should invite him more often." He stopped. "Why are you guys following me again?"

Kiiro giggled. "We're sleeping over with Kuro-chan, _Kibaka. _Just because you're not her brother by blood doesn't mean she's about to move into the Uchiha complex."

"Oh, yeah..." Kiba said. "She's not really my sister..." he got a very strange look on his face, as if he were imagining something extremely disturbing, yet entertaining. Kuroppi, unfortunately, did not miss this.

She ran and hugged him. "Don't worry, Kiba-niichan! You'll always be my brother to _me!_"

Kiba shook his head and the strange expression left his face. His usual 'big brother' expression returned. "That's good to hear," he said awkwardly.

Everyone walked on in silence untill they reached the Inuzuka house.

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"I have a tape!" Inuzuka Hana announced. "That Kuroppi-chan will like to see!"

Kuroppi raised her eyebrows. "What is it?"

"It's of the Chuunin exams battle where Neji got his ass kicked," Tsume announced from the kitchen. "Enjoy!"

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_Naruto flew out of the ground and his fist knocked Neji into the air._

"I've only met Naruto once or twice, but I think he might be my favorite person," Kuroppi said.

"You met him?" Kiiro asked. "I don't think I have. What happened?"

**(Kuro-chan flashback mode XD)**

_"Oi! KIBA!" seven-year-old Naruto ran up to Kuroppi's adopted older brother. "What's with the girl? Is she Sasuke's twin or something?"_

_Kuroppi, age six, shot the loud blonde and annoyed look. "I'm an Inzuka," she said darkly. Fuyu and Akamaru barked in agreement._

_"Oh!" Naruto's eyes widened. "Maybe the Uchiha and Inuzuka clans are related?"_

_Kiba shook his head. "Naruto, we'Inuzuka're no where __**near**__ related to those stuck-ups. Besides, she's __**my **__sister!" The dog-boy smirked. "She's too __**cute**__ to be an Uchiha!"_

_Kuroppi giggled for effect. Naruto stared at her for a second, then nodded._

_"Well, I gotta go make Iruka-sensei buy me ramen! Later!" Naruto grinned and ran off._

**(End Kuro-chan flashback mode XD)**

"Oh, I see. HA! Naruzumaki thought you were Uchihasuke!" Kiiro giggled. "I get it!"

"Hmmm..." Kiba thought for a moment. "Kiiro, have you ever tried ramen?"

Kiiro sighed. "I lived off the stuff when I was really little, but in truth I haven't had ramen since before I ran away."

"Didn't they send anyone after you?" Kon questioned.

The blonde idiot (not Naruto) nodded hyperishly. "They did! But the council wanted me as a ninja since I'm_ Warai Mamoka's_ child!"

"Was she _really_ that good?" Kuroppi asked doubtfully.

"Mamoka-san was the best kunoichi in Konoha when it came to scaring people!" Tsume recalled, walking in. "She was on the Interrogations squad! Almost gave Ibiki a run for his money!"

"Bet she got along well with Anko-sensei," Kon chuckled.

Hana nodded. "Uchiha Mikoto, Mitarashi Anko, and Warai Kiiro, thick as theives. if Orochimaru hadn't gained an interest in your sensei, she probably would've been on their team instead of Shizune-san."

Tsume nodded, then stared at Kiiro. "Kiiro-chan...? Why are you wearing a shirt with a huge hole in it? There's bloodstains on it too..."

"It's my favorite shirt!" Kiiro said quickly. She was still wearing the same shirt she;d been wearing when Kuroppi killed her in Orochimaru's lair. There was, as Tsume had said, a huge hole and bloodstains on it.

Kon rolled her eyes. "Kiiro, please tell me you have more than one shirt."

"I wash it at night!" Kiiro protested. "So there's nothing wrong with it!"

Hana glared at kiiro and left the room. When she came back in five mintues later, she was holding up a dark blue shirt that crossed over on the wearer's left.

"You will wear this," she said, in a tone that implied that she would not allow anything else. "And you will take the other three just like it. No way in hell we're letting my little sister's friend go around shirtless."

"I'm not!" Kiiro said, tugging the sleeve of her (too-small, ripped-up, bloodstained) shirt for emphasis.

"With a shirt like that you'd be better off without one," Tsume said. "Take Hana's shirts. NOW."

Kiiro sweatdropped and accepted the shirts. "Thank you, I guess..."

"Couldn't you have used the money from the mission where your shirt got ripped up to buy a new one?" Kiba asked Kiiro.

"... Good point."

"Now give Hana-neesan back those shirts, they're Kuroppi-chan's by right." Kiba glared darkly.

Kiiro, having been glared at by Kuroppi several times in her life, was unnafected by this glare. "They were _given_ to me, Kibaka, so, by right, they are _mine_." She glared at Kiba.

Kiba, having not been glared at Kuroppi as many times as Kiiro had, was creeped out, even though Kiiro was not the best at glaring, because he had never seen Kiiro glare at _anyone_ before.

"She has a point there," Hana chuckled. "Get off it, Kiba."

"Okay, Okay," Kiba mumbled, "Naruto look-alike."

Kiiro exploded. "I DO NOT LOOK LIKE NARUTO!!!"

_"Yes, you do,"_ Fuyu chuckled walking into the room. She grabbed the bone Akamaru was chewing on from him, and walked out (Akamaru yipping angrily at her).

"Besides..." Kiro said, "Kibaka, you have the same _hairdo _ as Naruto does, so are you really one to talk?"

"My hairdo doesn't look like Naruto's!" Kiba yelled at her.

Kiiro smirked. "Oh yes it does!"

"Doesn't!"

"Does!"

"Doesn't!"

"Does!"

The one to interrupt this argument was Kon, who was trying to fall asleep on the couch.

"You _BOTH_ look like Naruto, now _Shut. Up_." This was followed by a massive killer intent that made Orochimaru look like a soft, cuddly bunny rabbit.

Silence reigned for the rest of the evening.

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The next morning, Kiiro woke up with her hair cut short.

"KIIIIIIBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

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Aki looked up from the mission report she was filling out. "Honemashi? Did you hear something just now?"

"No," the Kaguya boy said groggily, plugging in the coffee maker.

"I did," Haku offered. "It sounded a little like Kiiro."

Honemashi chuckled. "Only you would say that."

"No, really! And it sounds like she's angry..."

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"Hahahahahahaha! Ahahahahaha! Ha!" Anko was rolling on the ground, laughing. "You really _do _look like him now!"

"Not helping, Anko-sensei..." Kiiro said dangerously, the stock of dange she was holding snapping in two.

"_Ahahaha! _Well, it doesn't matter anyway, because of the training you three are you going to do starting tomorrow..." Anko grinning evilly. "Pack enough food for a week, warm clothes, and all your weapons. Meet me tomorrow in fornt of Trainign Area 44..."

Kuroppi and Kiiro paled slightly, and Kon raised her eyebrows at Anko. "The Forest of Death...?"

Anko nodded fervently. "The very same! All you three have to do is survive a week in there. Don't worry, if anyone almost dies I'll probably save them. But I won't be visible to anyone, so forget that."

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Team Four stood in front of Training Area 44, all shaking in fear.

"A week?" Kiiro gaped. "In there?" She had gotten her hair evened out so it was less messy, and it layed a little flatter on her head, but she still looked eerily like Naruto, as several people had already pointed out. Kuroppi, in particular, was teasing her a lot, because of the many years she'd been compared to Sasuke. In other words, our favorite dumb blonde (besides Naruto) was in a very bad mood indeed.

Anko nodded. "This is the _same_ training I received when I was your age? It's called 'One Week In Hell' or a 'Hell-week' for short."

"The same training you received when you were our age?" Kon asked. _"Before _or _after_ you got the curse mark? And no offense, but I don't think the person who trained you has the best of judgement..."

Anko grinned. "No matter. Trust me, under Orochimaru, a Hell-week was nothing. By the time I'm done with you three, you'll be used to it as well."

Kon nodded.

"Why are we doing this again?" Kuroppi asked.

Anko smirked. "I'm _so _glad you asked, Kuro-chan! You see, Kon-chan passed the chuunin exams last time, but you people weren't ready yet, so they put her with Asuma's team."

"Isn't Ino on that team?" Kiiro asked.

"Yes," Kon groaned, "She is."

"ANYWAY!" Anko boomed. "I want you all to pass the exam your first time, because it'll make me look good. It hasn't been decided who your third teammate for the exams will be yet, but for now the three--" Fuyu growled. "Excuse me, four of you will do Hell-weeks at least once every month, possibly with additional tasks to do, until the time for the chuunin exam comes again. Then, we all get on the wagon to Amegakure (Rain Village), where the exams are. And then we'll al be chuunin and we won't have chores as missions!"

"YAY for not catching that damn cat Tora!" Kiiro yelled, pumping her first in the air.

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Me: w00t! finally done! next time, we'll all be going to the chuunin exams and we'll meet a bunch of new people.

Pein (aka teh leader of Akatsuki): Did I hear _Amegakure? _Does this meanI and my henchmen will make an appearance?

Me: (evil laughter) we'll see.

Pein: Be sure to get my good side!

Me: Pein, in fanfiction there is no good side. We don't see pictures.

Pein: I hate you.

Kuroppi: Next time on Anko Plus Gennin Equals: Pure Chaos, I'm going to see one of my blood brother, Kon's going to beat up Daidaiiro again, and Kiiro's going to act stupid. Do you need any other reasons to read it when it comes out?

Kiiro: ... (listens to reasons) That's not a valid reason! Screw you. Now REVIEW!


	11. Team Four, Half a Year Later

Me: I wrote another chapter, finally got around to it!

Banshou: Yaaaay! Shashuko, the Paisley Maiden doesn't own Naruto...

Me: But I do own Groundhog Day! Happy Groundhog Day, and thanks for being sooo patient with meh. ON TO THE FICCY!

Kiiro pressed herself flat against a tree in the Forest of Death. Her target was standing on a branch, about twenty feet, away, and didn't seem to see her.

_'Now what?' _Kiiro thought to herself. _'I'm out of kunai and shuriken, and I don't really have any techniques beyond the basics-- WAIT! Scratch that!'_

She bit her thumb and pressed in on the ground, mumblind to herself, "Kuchiyose no jutsu!"

The target looked up. "Kiiro-chan, that isn't going to work. You can only summon that baby fox Ussura, and she can't do much--" A dark orange fox that was_ decidedly larger_ than Ussura bowled her over.

"Did you say something about me sister?" He growled. "I don't care if you ARE my sister's teammate, you take that back NOW!"

The person Anzentenkou had pinned into a tree was Kon.

"Okay, okay, I take it back," Kon said. "BUT, still... SEN'EI TA-JASHU!"

Hundreds apon hundred of snakes lept out of Kon's long, red sleeves and pinned Anzentenko to a tree.

"I think I win this round, Kiiro. Come out or my snakes will find--" Another fox, this one a lighter hue, slammed her into another tree, causing her to let go of the darker one.

"Good one, Tanshokutenko-sama!" Kiiro cheered, coming out from behind the tree.

Anzentenko pulled a face. "What about me?"

"Oh all right," Kiiro chuckled, "You too."

The reason Kiiro and Kon were in Training Area 44, you ask? Well, Anko never had them do Hell-weeks anywhere else, you see, so they shouldn't have been anywhere else at this time. This was their ninth Hell-week so far.

"Will you buy us Inarizushi?" Tanshokutenko asked eagerly as Anzentenko aided him in pinning Kon against the trunk of the large tree, being sure to put extra pressure on her arms to she could send him flying again (Inarizushi is a sweet fried tofu pocket wrapped around rice, a favorite of the kitsune in Japanese folklore).

"Okay, I will," Kiiro laughed. Suddenly, she gasped. "WAIT!"

"What?" Kon asked.

"Where'd Kuro-chan go? The goal of this Hell-week was to get a scroll from her, wasn't it?"

Both girls sweatdropped. Since the person out of the two of them who didn't get the scroll from Kuroppi had to buy dango for the whole team (Anko and Fuyu included), and this was the las day of the Hell-week, they had gotten more than a little carried away.

"Hmmmm... Temporary truce? We both want that scroll, so we can get it, then fight over it later," Kiiro said. "Oh, no wait... the chances of me winning that fight are very low. Work together, then decide the outcome over rock-paper-scissors?"

"Rock-paper scissors?" Kon asked. Kiiro nodded.

"Rock-paper-scissors. What kind of _idiot _would decide something like this over rock-paper-scissors?"

"I know someone who walked around the village a hundred times on his_ hands _ over a game of rock-paper-scissors!" Kiiro objected. "And his student walked a good percentage of the way_ with _him. So, that makes rock-paper-scissors important, at least to those two."

"You know increasingly weird people," Kon decided.

Kiiro giggled. "People with problems," she agreed, thinking of Honemashi (because Honemashi has problems).

"You guys, I've got a watch and there's_ five minutes_ left before this Hell-week is over, so hurry up and catch me," chuckled Kuroppi suddenly from high above them. "I've been up here for all seven days."

Like a flash, the two foxes holding Kon let go of her and jumped up to reach the Uchiha heiress.

Like a mallet, she smashed them down with her fists.

"You gotta do better than that," she taunted, "Geez, Kiiro, do you have any jutsu besides the summoning and the basic academy ones?"

Kiiro hung her head. "No, ma'am."

"And if the fate of the mission was in _your _hands, would this be a _help_, or a _hindrance?_"

"A hindrance..." Kiiro sighed.

Kuroppi smirked from her position high up in the trees. "Good girl. Have a scroll." She tossed the scroll down to Kiiro as her digital watch (bought with Uchiha clan funds) started beeping. "Times' up!"

Anko appeared before them in a puff of smoke. "Good job! Kon-chan's buying us all dango. BUT FIRST! Go take shower, all of you! You smell almost as bad as like you rolled in Ibiki's dirty laundry!"

Kiiro grinned pervertedly at her. "And how would you know what Ibiki's dirty laundry smells like, Anchan-sensei dearest?"

"Lost a bet... had to do it for a week..." Anko lied.

Kiiro sniffed herself. "And it smelled _worse _than I do now?"

Anko nodded, and everyone shivered collectively.

Kiiro made a face at her own reflection in the mirror.

"I really _do_ look like Naruto with my hair like this..." She blew a rasberry and fiddled with her wet hair, sending drops down onto her fuzzy blue bathrobe. "It's been almost five months since Kiba cut it, and I still can't get over it! _Why_ must I suck in this way?"

"Kiiro, you suck in _every_ way," Ussura pointed out, sitting down on Kiiro's vanity table.

Kiiro petted the small fox demon absentmindedly. "I know..." she sighed. "I really need to learn more jutsu."

"Well..." Ussura said. "You know... we demons use jutsu too. Maybe I or my niisans could teach you..."

Kiiro's eyes got bigger than basketballs. "Really?" She whispered, awed by the idea of learning jutsu used by demons.

The chibi kitsune shrugged. "We'll see. I'll ask Mesu-baasama."

"Who's that?" Kiiro asked curiously.

Ussura beamed proudly. "My obaachan(grandma) of course! Since Ojiichan's stuck in that kid Naruto, she's ruling the fox demons right now in his place. She was also the only one who could reason with him when he was drunk..."

Kiiro twitched. "Kyuubi-sama got drunk?"

Ussura nodded. "His intoxication can last centuries. Literally. Actually, now that I think of it, he was drunk when he attacked this village."

"Well, that explains a lot. I always thought we'd done something to make him angry, or he just felt like smashing something, like when I used to burn ants with a spyglass or put salt on slugs when I was little," Kiiro thought aloud.

"Don't compare demons to you humans," Ussura growled dangerously.

Kiiro giggled. "Sorry, I like demons too much to do that. You really are a higher life form."

"And don't I know it!" Ussura crowed.

Anko raised her sake glass high. "Here's to a Hell-week well done!"

Kiiro cheered and raised her mug of hot chocolate. "I got free dango!" She cheered.

Kon muttered a few choice words under her breath.

"You're welcome, by the way," Kuroppi hinted.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry Kuro-chan! Thanks a ton!" Kiiro grinned, putting in her dango in her mouth. "Ahhhh-mmm."

Kuroppi's response was to hit her head on the table. "Please, don't make weird noises when you eat..."

"Ah-hem!" Anko slurred slightly. "I have something for Kuroppi and Kiiro!"

"You do?" Kiiro asked eagerly. "What is it?"

She held out two cards dramatically in a manner reminiscent to Yu-gi-oh! (oh, give her a break. she's drunk). "You two are going to the chuunin exams!"

"WOOHOOO!" Kiiro said, jumping up and hitting her head on the ceiling with a loud 'THUD' sound. "Owwwww..."

_"And this, children, is why we don't do crack,"_ Kon said in a serious voice, causing Kuroppi, Anko, and even the one who'd inspired this remark, Kiiro, to laugh.

"Neeee..." Kiiro said, "Anchan-sensei? Kon-chan already passed the test, so who're we taking it with?"

Anko smirked. "Did Gai or Kakashi ever tell you about their eighty-sixth challenge?" When everybody shook their head, Anko continued. "Gai had just taken in his team..."

---- (Anko Flashback Mode)----

"Kakashi, my eternal rival!" Gai ran up to Kakashi grinning. "Let us see whose team is stronger-- mine or yours!"

Kakashi looked boredly at the spandex-wearing lunatic. "My team didn't pass... maybe next year."

"Then I have our next challenge!" Gai said exitedly. "Pick someone from your failed team and train them for a month, and I'll train my students. Then, one of my students will be picked at random to fight your pupil!"

"Hmmm..." Kakashi said. "The odds are definitely in my favor here... sure. Why not? One of them seemed promising enough."

---- (End Flashback Mode)----

"That person was trained by Kakashi," Anko concluded.

"Did he win?" Kiiro asked excitedly. "Is that the person who's gonna be on our team?"

Anko smirked. "To answer your questions, no_ she_ didn't win against the 'randomly picked' person, who just _happened _to be Neji, the strongest person on the team at the time, but she got pretty close. And _yes, _she'll be working with you. Once Kakashi trained her for that month, he ditched her and she continued to get stronger, and she's ready to take the exam."

"Who is it?" Kiiro asked excitedly.

Anko smirked. "We can go over that later. In the meantime, I'd like you to meet the people you'll be carpooling with to the exams!"

"Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirooooooooooooo-chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!"

Kasshukosuna no Banshou ran right into Kiiro.

"Banchan!" Kiiro squealed. "You're carpooling with us?"

Banshou nodded. "Me, your team, my team, Aki-sama's team, and the other caravan's got GAARA in it!" she hugged Kiiro tighter.

"Good for you!" Kiiro cheered, "And I had a feeling Aki was near here. But I can't breath right now!" she pushed Banshou's arms off of herself, and they fell off.

"Oops," Banshou laughed. "Good thing I'm wearing a tank top." She giggled and regrew her arms.

"Which reminds me," Kiiro said, "Do I have any cool powers like yours or Honemashi's?"

"Being stuck the same age for the rest of your life is NOT cool," Honemashi said, appearing from behind Banshou.

"Stuck...?" Kiiro asked. "You mean you've been seven years old since you died?"

"Eight!" Honemashi yelled. He sighed. "Eight years old for time and all eternity... that's why I wasn't interested in Orochimaru's offer of eternal youth. I already have that... and it _sucks."_ He pulled a face. "Anyone going after my condition has problems. _Major_ problems."

Kon nodded. "This is Orochimaru we're talking about here. He was _born _with problems."

"Remember who you are before you speak," Anko slurred. "If he was born with problems, then so were _you._"

Kon's response was to glare at her sensei. "I'm not the one who's drinking a third supersized bottle of sake."

"So their sensei has problems too...?" Honemashi asked himself.

"Hmmm..." Kon said. "Well, I'd say... yes. In fact, she almost makes Orochimaru look normal..."

"Heeeey! If I wasssshn't drunk, I'd find that offeeeeeeeending."

"Haku?" Aki asked, rapping on the wagon door. "You've been in there all day. You coming out?"

"Are we leaving soon?" Haku asked, avoiding the question. He was huddled in acorner, wrapped in a blanket, with his iPod turned on full blast.

Aki smiled. "At least you're not acting like I own you anymore. That was creepy."

"You don't, I just owe you my life," Haku retorted.

A second voice spoke from outside, coming from a girl about Kiiro's age. "Is this where Team Anko is putting their stuff?"

"Yes," said Aki's voice, "It is. Why?"

"I'm going with them. Can I put my stuff...?"

"How can we trust you?" Aki asked suspiciously.

A third, male voice answered. "Trust me. You can."

Haku gasped. That voice was Hatake... Kakashi...

The man who killed him.

"Kiiro, did you pack everything?" Kuroppi asked for the third time. On the last mission where they left the village, Kiiro had forgotten her hairbrush and borrowed Kuroppi's. It had broken in Kiiro's hair.

"Yes, _mother_," Kiiro said, rolling her eyes, "I even checked. Twice. Happy?"

"Yes!" Banshou answered, even though kiiro was talking to her. Both Beatles fans laughed at this, leaving Kon in particular weirded out.

"There's the wagon!" Anko said, pointing at one of the wagons in the distance. "Kakashi and the other gennin are already there talking to Aki!"

"NEW TEAMMATE!!!" Kiiro ran for the wagons.

Haku held his breath. He didn't regret dying, but he couldn't help but be a little afraid of the person who had killed him. He wasn't completely naive.

"This is my former student," Kakashi was saying. "Since Kon already took the exams, she'll be going with Team four in Kon's place."

"Aki-saaamaaaaa!" Kiiro ran and glomped the Hokou junchuuriki. "How are ya?"

Aki sweatdropped. "I'm fine... is there any particular reason you're hugging me?"

"Hugging people is my new hobby!" was Kiiro's explanation. "I hug all my friends! Except Kon-chan."

"Why don't you hug Kon?" Kakashi prodded. "Is it because she's technically Orochimaru?"

"Nope!" Kiiro giggled. "I don't hug her because she asked me not to!"

"Oh..." Kakashi said. "That makes sense..."

"Hi!" said the girl standing behind Kakashi. Her light brown hair was tied in a braid that fell over her left shoulder. Her outfit consisted of a light blue spandex suit (with short legs and no sleeves) that had a light skirt over it, orange leg-warmers, and blue... those weird shoes that ninja wear. Most notable, however, were the sandy cat ears on her head and her bushy cat tail.

"I _love_ your ears and tail!" Kiiro gushed. "Where'd you get them?"

"They're real. I got them from a rock-nin on one of my missions."

Aki raised her eyebrows. "Nii Yugiito?"

The girl nodded. "That's the one!"

"She's the Nekomata junchuuriki," Aki noted. "The ears and tail are a gift from the Nibi, the two-tails."

Kiiro gasped. "A new bloodline limit?"

"Probably," Aki said. She turned to the catgirl."What's your name, anyway?"

The girl smiled. "I'm Detarame Koneko!" She said.

"Nice to meet you, Neko-chan!" Kiiro giggled. "I'm Warai Kiiro and I'm gonna be your teammate for the exam. The other person on our team for the exams, is--"

Kuroppi appears behind Kiiro."I can introduce myself, Smart One."

Kiiro stuck out her tongue at Kuroppi, who rolled her eyes in response. "And before you ask, NO I am not Uchiha Sasuke. My name is Inuzuka Kuroppi, and this is Fuyu."

Fuyu grinned wolfishly. "Someone gifted by the Nekomata... this'll be interesting."

"Didn't Nekomata-sama and Hokou-sama have some sort of alliance at some point?" Kiiro thought aloud.

Aki's hair turned white and Hokou's voice spoke. "Yes, we did. We were trying to stop Youko during one of his drunken rages."

"Youko?" Neko asked. "Who's that?"

"The Kyuubi-sama," Kiiro explained.

Neko stared at her. "Kyuubi-_sama_?"

Kiiro nodded. "Yes. Sama. I happen to respect demons no matter WHO they attack when they're drunk."

"Kyuubi was drunk?" Neko laughed. "How do you know that?"

"My summons told me," Kiiro clarified. "So... you'll be taking the exam with us, right?"

Neko nodded.

"Well, then!" Kiiro hugged Neko. "Let's be friends!"

"Okay!" Neko said.

Kakashi sighed. "This is why I only trained her for a month... why must she jump to conclusions to easily? What a clueless ninja..."

"So this is Konoha, huh, Daidaiiro?" a short blonde Suna-nin asked the taller, red-haired puppeteer.

"Yes, Akaii, it is," Daidaiiro said.

"So..."Akaii said. "Why are we walking aimlessly through the streets?"

"I'm looking for that girl who beat me in the last Chuunin exams. I want a rematch," explained Daidaiiro.

"Kukuku..."

Kon stepped out form behind tree. "You _know_ I'll just beat you again, right?"

Daidaiiro smirked. "We'll see..." He reached for a scroll on his belt.

Kon disappeared and was suddenly next to Daidaiiro, who was punched to the ground.

"I win." And Kon walked away.

"Haa-kun!" Kiiro called. "You in there?"

Kuroppi pushed Kiiro away from the door. "HAKU!" she yelled. "Unlock that door or I break in and Mangekyou your ASS off! We need to put our stuff in the caravan!"

"Coming!" Haku opened the door. He was wearing a white tank top and grey plaid boxers.

"You woke me up," Haku mumbled.

Aki looked over at Kiiro. "I'm sure she did," she laughed.

Kuroppi nodded. "She took yelling lessons from Kiba-niisan. That makes her the second loudest person in the village."

Haku looked at Kiiro and gasped. "Kiiro, your hair!"

Kiiro laughed nervously. "Speaking of Kuro-chan's brother..." she growled, "He has anger issues." The fox-summoner stroked her hair self-conciously. "And now I look like a boy..." she whined.

"No, no you don't!" Haku said quickly, waving his hands frantically.

Kiiro laughed downheartedly. "Oh, come off it. Even _you _look more like a girl than me, and you're wearing the classic Manly Sleep-Wear outfit!" she gestured at Haku's (thin, tight) shirt, and he blushed and ran back into the caravan, proceeding to drape a flannel blanket around himself.

Kuroppi and Aki smirked at him.

"He's got it so bad," Anko chuckled, then turned to Kiiro. "Manly Sleep-Wear?"

Kiiro nodded earnestly. "Boxers with a tank top," she explained.

Kuroppi shook her head. "Where the hell do you come up with these things?"

"Anko-sensei, you're not coming?" Kiiro asked, eyes big and wide. Everyone was about to leave and all the stuff was packed into the caravan.

Anko nodded. "The sensei of a team can only train on of his or her student for the exams, and I already trained Kon here. Kiiro, you're going to be trained by Kakashi."

Kiiro looked confused. "But shouldn't he train Neko-chan?"

Koneko shook her head. "Baka-kashi-sensei trained Sasuke for the exams, but he can train you too because you're not his student."

Kiiro nodded. "Oh... that makes sense. Who's training Kuro-chan then? Since Kakashi's trained Sasuke, then wouldn't that be better--"

"My training was arranged for someone else a month ago," Kuroppi interjected. "Or, at least, this is what I'm told. Whoever it was, the council member who told me seemed pretty scared..." She smirked. "They must be pretty damn strong. I'm meeting them in Amegakure."

Kiiro nodded. "They must be. But the council called you to tell you you're gonna be trained by someone, and they won't tell you who? That just seems stupid."

"Councils often are," Aki sighed. "As Honemashi would put it, they have problems."

"I'll have to agree with you, there," a voice near them said monotonously. "I find the best way to get around them is to become higher ranked then they are."

It was a man wearing white and blue robes and a pointy hat with the symbol for 'wind' on it.

Another man, this one wearing a hat with kitty ears on it and black long johns, looked at Kiiro and chuckled.

"And here, I thought Naruto had no living relatives," The man laughed.

Kiiro's eyes widened. "That's it!" She turned to face Kuroppi. "Maybe Naruto _is _related to me, on my Dad's side, and that's why the council won't tell me! The council _hates _that guy!" The demon-lover's face turned from happy to angry. "The council..."

"The council?" Koneko asked cluelessly.

Kiiro nodded. "The council!" She yelled. "They don't like me either, so obviouslythey wouldn't want me talking to _him_!" She smirked.

Gaara's eyes narrowed at Kiiro. He had just met her, and already he didn't like her. She seemed to be another stupid narrow-minded person who hated demons--

"Well, that settles it!" Kiiro cheered. "When Uzumaki Naruto returns to Konoha, I'm going to introduce myself!"

Kuroppi smirked. "Yeah. just don't keep your hair short," she advised, "or when you met him, he'll think Orochimaru cloned him."

Kiiro head hung. "I really do look like a boy, don't I?"

The cat-hatted man spoke up. "Well, Uzumaki Naruto looks like you, so I suppose you could say that you look like a boy, or that he looks like a girl. It works both ways."

Kiiro shook her head. "I've been mistaken for him ever since I showed up here in Konoha, and he's probably never been mistaken for me."

The man in Kazekage robes spoke. "How can you know that?"

"Because people in Konoha knew Naruto's face first, and you never mistake someone for someone you haven't met," Kiiro explained. "It all comes down to logic!"

"Because he's older," Kuroppi added for the two sand-nin's benefit.

Kiiro chuckled. "Oh, they don't just know him because he's older..." She chuckled.

Before Kuroppi or the cat-hatted man, (Gaara, of course, knew exactly what Kiiro was talking about), Banshou ran to greet everybody from... wherever she had been before.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" She squealed, running to death-glomp Gaara.

"I was wondering about that," the cat-hatted man said thoughtfully. "Gaara, why doesn't the sands block you from being hugged?"

"Kankurou, the sand only blocks movements made with an attempt to hurt me," Gaara sighed. "Banshou is hugging me, not throwing things at me, so the sand lets her come closer to me than most people."

"So, Temari's chronic fear of hugging you for the first ten years of your life was ill-placed?" Kankurou asked.

Gaara glared at his older brother. "Yes."

"Someone was afraid of hugging you?" Kiiro asked, in awe.

"Everyone was afraid of hugging me," Gaara said, turning his glare to the blonde gennin in front of him.

"Wow. That _really _sucks," Kiiro noted. "I feel bad for you. Hugging is the ultimate win. How could you have not been hugged all that time!"

"I hugged him!" Banshou said. "But he didn't seem to like it much for a long, long time."

"Oh, I see," Kuroppi said. "Where did your teammates go? We have to go soon..."

"We're right behind you," came a small voice from behind Kuroppi.

Another voice added, "Wow, she really is a Smart One."

The two people behind Kuroppi were, of course, Daidaiiro and Akaii.

"Akasuna no Daidaiiro, right?" Kiiro asked. "I saw you fight my teammate Kon-chan."

Daidaiiro nodded. "You're the one whose friend stabbed her in the back."

"Stomach," corrected Banshou, Kuroppi, and Kiiro in unison. "I/She stabbed Kiiro/me in the stomach."

The red-headed puppeteer shrugged. "Okay then. This is Bakemonokawa Akaii." He gestured at the little blonde boy standing next to him. "Kiiro here might call him Akachan."

Kiiro giggled. "With that build? He's _Chibi_ Akachan."

Kuroppi just _stared _at Akaii. "Sooo... cuuute..." she gushed.

Kiiro turned to her teammate the Uchiha. "Hug him?"

Kuroppi thought for a moment. "... Hell, yes."

Kiiro and Kuroppi both grinned evilly, then approached Akaii very slowly and gave him a loooong hug.

Akaii's face turned white and he started squirming. "Leggoofme! Leggoleggo!"

"But you're so cuuuuute..." the much larger and more than slightly deranged girls hugged him chimed in unison.

"I'M NOT CUUUTE!" Akaii yelled. "Notcute-notcute-notcute!"

Daidaiiro smirked. "He doesn't like being called cute," he informed the huggers.

"The applicants for the chuunin exam will be arriving soon," noted a lady with blue hair. "What are we going to do...? Pein."

The man sitting in the shadows grinned. "True, Konan, true. Some of our targets will be here, as well as... _that _girl. Miki!"

A tall girl with light brown hair bowed low. "Yes, Pein-sama!"

"I'm going to put you and your team into these exams so you can find out about these people. Understood."

Miki looked up. "Of course, Pein-sama! I'll do anything!"

Pein smirked. "I thought so."

Finally, Team Four (sans Kon, plus Neko) were on their way to the village Hidden in the Rain. They'd been riding for three hours...

"Road trips are borrrriiiiiinnnng," Kiiro whined.

Haku smiled softly. "They're not that bad if you can entertain yourself."

"But how I am I gonna do thaaaaaat?" Kiiro pointed out, still cranky.

Honemashi smirked. "Yeah, Haku, how is she gonna entertain herself?"

"Maybe yooouuu could entertain her..." Aki teased.

Haku went red and looked away. "You guys..."

Kiiro looked around blankly. "I don't get it," she announced. "... Hey, look! That wagon's got the Iwa symbol on it!"

"Shhh, Kiiro, not so loud!" Kuroppi whispered. "Iwa's still upset with us over the Shinobi War!"

"All Iwa-nin pretty much automatically hate all Konoha-nin," Neko added.

Yelling could be heard from the Iwa wagon.

"Yeah, 'cause Konoha-nin all suck! You know they killed--" a boy's voice yelled angrily.

He was quieted by a girl's voice. "Not everyone from the same place is the same! One of my childhood friends ran away from home to be a ninja in Konoha, and if it's that important to my friend, then they can't be that bad."

Kiiro looked up. Her eyes widened. She ran for the back of the wagon and poked her head out the door, smiling...

"FUJI-CHAN?!?"

Kuro: ... what? a new chapter? of THIS fic? ... from YOU?!? I was sure you'd given up or something...

Me: Only goes to show! I have far too much spare time on my hands. Next time on Anko Plus Gennin Equals: Pure Chaos!

Kiiro: OMG it's Fuji-chan from my old hometown!

Kuro: You ran away? YOU ran away? From home?

Kon: I have a hard time believing that... Kiiro isn't that sort of person. She's to much of a goody-two-shoes...

Kiiro: HEY!!!


	12. CHUUNIN EXAMS start!

"Fuji-chan?" Kiiro gasped, poking her head out the wagon window to face another girl, looking out of _her _ wagon's window-- a girl with short brown hair and purple eyes.

"KIIRO!" The girl grinned. "I see you became a ninja!"

Kiiro grinned back. "I see you did too! I thought your parents weren't you go let you...?"

The brown-haired girl's response was to point her head in the direction of the lizard sleeping on her arm. "Apparently, they didn't know how big Elvi could get. Of course, she gets bigger now..."

Kiiro winced. "If I fight you, I'm soooo dead."

"I wouldn't kill you! You're my friend!"

Kiiro nodded, then took a moment to smile evilly at Kuroppi for the 'you're my friend' remark, before turning back to her friend. "How us everybody back home...? I've been to grudge-bearing to visit them since I ran away, so I have no idea what the hell's going on."

The other girl gasped. "You mean haven't seen them since you were six?"

"Oh yeah." Kiiro's tone was smug. "But I grabbed some cookies in my way out when I left..."

"Mangekyou sharingan inducing cookies?" Kuroppi asked, smirking.

Kiiro grinned. "Yes, those cookies. So I'm a cookie thief, too. Everyone! This is my friend from my old hometown, Bakemono Fujiiro! Or Fuji-chan in kiirospeak."

"Nice to meet you all," Fujiiro said, stroking her lizard as the wagon she was on started to speed up. "Oh! See you guys all later. I look forward to fighting you, Kiiro-chan!"

"I'm sooo dead," Kiiro sighed.

...

"... So, here we are again, bored as ever," Honemashi sighed.

"Hmm..." Kiiro thought for a moment, then started singing:

"Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nin bottles of beer! You take one, and pass it around, ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall! Ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-eight bottles of beer..."

...

"You take one down, you pass it around, twenty-seven bottles of beer on the wall! Twenty-seven bottles of beer on the wall, twenty-seven bottles of beer!"

By this point, everyone except for Honemashi had started singing, and Honemashi was hiding his face in a pillow ('that song has made you all _drunk_ and I don't want as part of that!').

"WOULD YOU PLEASE SHUT UP?!" He yelled.

...

"You take one down and pass it around, zero bottles of beer on the wall!"

Everyone cheered, including Honemashi (who was just glad it was over).

"Kiiro, when you were introducing yourself to Anko-sensei when we first became gennin, you said you didn't like your little siblings," Kuroppi noted. "How do you even _have _little siblings? Your mom died when you were just a baby, so... are you twins or something?"

"Huh?" Kiiro said. "Oh... that!" She laughed. "My cousins. I was raised for the first six years by my aunt and my uncle, so the would call me 'neechan.' I referred to them as my sister and my brother..."

"Why don't you like them?" Kuroppi asked confused. "Brothers are _fun!_"

"Your brothers are s-ranked criminals," Kiiro pointed out. "So, of course they're fun. My guys are just annoying-- barring my missing older brother, whose name in unknown to me and who may or may not be dead."

Kakashi spluttered the water he was drinking all over himself.

"You know my brother?" Kiiro asked suspiciously.

Kakashi sighed. "Yes-- I'm not telling you who he is."

"Bastard," Kiiro muttered, sticking out her tongue.

Kakashi just smiled (though, with that mask of his, it was pretty hard to tell).

...

"Miki," Pein called, "They'll be arriving soon. Go greet them..."

"Hai, Pein-sama," Miki replied, disappearing in a puff of smoke.

...

"We're HERE!" Kiiro exclaimed. "Thank goodness, I can stretch my legs!" Kiiro got out of the wagon and did three laps around it before collapsing into the ground.

"Road trips always make me soooo exhausted," she muttered. "What about you, Haku?"

"M-me?" Haku stuttered, pointing at himself. "I don't know about _exhausted... _road trips give me time to think."

"And what do you think about?" Kuroppi teased.

Haku blushed. "That's-- that's none of your business!"

"Oh, that's right!" Kiiro said. "Haku, you said you have a girl you like, right?"

"R-right..." Haku said.

Kiiro grinned. "That's cool! Few people our age who like someone turn into a fangirl or fanboy-- it's pretty damn obvious you're not or we'd all know who it is."

Kuroppi, Honemashi, and Aki had to hide their chuckles.

"You're in the minority!" Kiiro concluded. "Congratulations!" She gave Haku a hug, then ran around the wagon again.

"Why'd you do that?" Aki asked.

"Because running around the wagon is fun!" Kiiro explained. "You should try it!"

"No, not that!" Kuroppi said. "Why'd you hug Haku?"

"Because he's in the minority," Kiiro said exasperatedly, but she would explain no further than that.

...

"Here is your room," the escort, a middle-aged Rain chuunin, explained tiredly. "You will stay here and for the most of your stay. Don't leave unless we tell you to or unless it becomes unsafe. There's a training area out back."

"Isn't this the Rain Village?" Kiiro wondered. "It's all sunny today."

Kuroppi rolled her eyes. "If it was rainy _every _day, everybody would drown. Or at least their crops would."

"There was no rain scheduled for today," the escort added, miffed. "Enjoy your stay."

He walked off, closing the door behind him.

"... Okay..." Kiiro said, "Rain can be _scheduled_ now?"

**"In this village, it can,"**Fuyu explained through clenched teeth. **"Also, the Akatsuki are supposed to be working here."**

Aki's head nodded and Hokou's voice said,_** "My sons died not very far from here."**_

**"Couldn't you have just resurrected them?"**__Fuyu asked.

_**"They were... **_**eaten.**_** Their bodies were not obtainable."**_

"Eaten?" Kiiro gasped, color draining out of her face. "That's... that's just..."

"Disgusting?" Aki offered._** "Thankfully, though, Akatsuki probably won't bug us for awhile. We cut a deal with them-- I won't kill their leader and they won't go after any jinchuuriki for awhile."'**_

"_Why_ are they going after jinchuuriki?" Kiiro asked.

Honemashi rolled his eyes. "They're gonna suck the demons out and put them under bondage," he said. "The jinchuuriki dies in the process."

"Yugiito's gonna die?" Koneko gasped (remember Koneko? she's been awfully quiet in this chapter...).

_**"Well, the reason they're waiting a few years is so that I can have enough chakra to save them all no matter how fast they're killed off,"**_ Hokou explained. _**"And, in return, I won't kill them and will come quietly when they've gotten the others... however, they said nothing about just **_**harming **_**them and I'm not gonna let them get the others." **_Aki's face smirked by Hokou's will.

Koneko smiled. "So, even if Yugiito dies, you'll save her?"

_**"Pretty much, yeah."**_

...

"Okay!" Kiiro said, looking at the instructions she had on a piece of paper. "Let's go take that exam! Wonder what the first part will be?"

"We'll just have to find out, won't we?" Haku said mysteriously.

"... Wait," Kiiro said, "Didn't you have an ANBU mask? Why are you taking chuunin exams if you're that high-ranked already?"

"When I returned to Mist after being resurrected, they stripped me of my title and made me start over at square one," Haku explained., "I got off easy-- usually they would've killed me, but because I'd been revived by Aki they couldn't touch me."

Aki smiled sadly. "They're scared of me, they don't want to make me mad."

"Ah..." Kiiro said, "Because you're the jinchuuriki?"

"Yeah," Aki laughed, "I creep them out."

"Can't live with her, can't live without her," Honemashi added.

"No, Honemashi, that's just how _you _feel," Kuroppi said. Honemashi blushed, everyone laughed (except Aki, who just kind of looked around cluelessly).

"... So, Haku's taken the exams before?" Kiiro asked, curious. "Where'd you take them?"

"Me?" Haku asked. "I took the chuunin exams in Konoha..."

"Konoha?" Kiiro gasped. "No way! Really?"

"Really," Haku assured her, "In fact, I had lunch at that dango place you're always talking about..."

"Wow," Kiiro laughed, "You learn something new everyday!"

"Yeah..." Haku said, "I guess so, huh? I remember, I was sitting there with Zabuza-san, when..." his eyes clouded over.

"I knocked over a girl's plate... she was only a little younger than me... she started crying and Zabuza-san made me buy her another one."

Kiiro stopped. And turned around, very slowly. "That was YOU?!"

-- (Kiiro flashback mode)--

"Stupid Chigatana," six-year-old Kiiro grumbled to herself, biting a dango ball off the stick viciously, "Thinks he's better than everyone else because he inherited some _sword_... I mean, come on! If you depend on weapons, then against someone if the same prowess who doesn't you're doomed from the start..."

Someone bumped her plate off the long table she was sitting at. It was a boy a couple years older than herself, with chin-length brown hair.

"Sorry!" he said quickly, picking up the pieces.

"Why'd you do that?" Kiiro asked, eyes tearing up. "That was the last of my food money for the week you just knocked over!"

"Oh... I'm so sorry!" the boy gasped. "Here, it hasn't been on the floor too long, maybe--"

"Oh, just buy her another one," grumbled the tall, overly tanned man behind him.

Haku nodded obediently. "Of course, Zabuza-san," he said, reaching into his pocket and ordering another stick of dango.

Kiiro giggled. "How gentlemanly of you!" she said.

--(End Kiiro Flashback Mode)--

"Well, Kiiro-san?" Haku asked. "Am I still gentlemanly?"

Kiiro giggled. "Yes!" She said, nodding.

And three gennin teams entered the room where the first part of the Chuunin Exams was taking place.

Kiiro stayed behind for a minute. "Kuchiyose no jutsu!" she whispered under her breath.

...

As Kiiro reentered the room, she ran right into a boy with white hair that reached his chin.

"Well, well, well," the boy said, smirking, "What have we here?"

Kiiro glared at the boy. "Chigatana," she hissed.

Chigatana glared right back. "Warai," he retorted. "How's it like depending on nonexistent demon summons you'll never have enough chakra to control?"

"That depends," Kiiro shot back, "How's it going being unable to do any jutsu without a blade in hand?"

Kiiro glared at Chigatana. Chigatana glared at Kiiro. Evil sparks of fury danced between them, and everyone in the room backed away for fear of getting hit.

Kuroppi rolled her eyes and pulled Kiiro away, as another girl grabbed Chigatana, hitting him across the head.

Kiiro stared at the girl who'd grabbed Chigatana. "Saku-sempai?"

Haruno Sakura grinned, patting Chigatana absentmindedly on the head. "They put me on your friend here's team because I couldn't cooperate with Ino and Chouji. His teammate Yuuta went with them."

Ino, Chouji, and a boy with spiky brown hair waved at Kiiro from across the room.

Kiiro waved back, mouthing, 'Hi, Yucchan!" at the brown-haired boy. He sweatdropped and waved back.

"Where's your last teammate then?" Kuroppi asked Chigatana, coming up from behind Kiiro and startling her.

Chigatana looked at Kuroppi and blushed slightly, then looked away.

"Yao broke his leg, so he couldn't come," Chigatana mumbled. "Ibiki-sensei said that he should stay home with the other rookies."

"Oh..." Kiiro said. "That explains a lot."

Something tapped her on the shoulder. _"Is that a demon at your heels?"_

"Yes," Ussura growled, "I am. Don't you _dare _make a Kyuubi joke," she added.

The person who had tapped Kiiro on the shoulder was a boy with bright green hair that hung stringily in his face, wearing all black leather. He glared at Ussura. "You'd better not get drunk," he said.

"I SAID NO KYUUBI JOKES!" Ussura yipped, starting to glow at the muzzle.

"Ussura-chan, no!" Kiiro gasped. "You're not supposed to use that inside!"

Ussura's eyes widened and the glowing stopped. She sniffed the green-haired boy lightly and grimaced.

Green-boy smirked. "Still as bratty as ever, I see," he chuckled darkly. "Well, then, Ussura... the last round of these exams is always a tournament. Maybe I'll get to kill you."

Kiiro looked suspiciously at the green-boy. "And exactly who the hell are you?"

The boy smirked. "I," he said, "_Am _the Rokubi no Raijuu."

"No, you're not," Kiiro said tiredly. "Don't say stuff like that. You give demon-obsessors like myself false hope."

The boy who claimed to be Raijuu smirked. "A demon-obsessor? I thought they didn't exist anymore... especially in Konoha. Did you hate someone that old drunk fox killed or something?"

Kiiro grinned. "Nope! I just appreciate the fact that demons are awesome. Why are you wearing long sleeves on a day like this?"

"That's not relevant--" the boy (who shall now be known as raijuu) started, but he was cut off.

"Are they to hide jinchuuriki markings?" Kiiro guessed. "You know, if you're self-concious about those, you can hide them with cover-up."

"I'm not a jinchuuriki!" Raijuu hissed. "I _am_ the demon!"

"Suuuure, you are," Kiiro said rolling her eyes. "Unfortunately, a human can only become a demon in the last moments of their life. And, usually, those humans are humans who were doing whatever they did to protect someone, so they end up a Guardian Angel instead of a Tormentor."

"You really did your research when you were dead, didn't you?" Honemashi noted.

Kiiro nodded. "I overheard some people talking about an ex-mist-nin who was placed as a Tormentor."

"Ah, that would do it," Honemashi said.

Raijuu glared at the two zombies. "How could you two, _living humans,_ possibly know of hell?"

Kiiro blinked. "Well," she said, "it might have something to do with the fact that I died about half a year ago.

"I died when I was about eight," Honemashi added. "I'm sixteen now."

Kiiro giggled. "You keep telling yourself that, Honema-chan. Keep telling yourself that."

Honemashi shot Kiiro a dirty look. "You have problems," he decided.

Kiiro grinned. "And don't I know it!"

...

"That was pretty easy," Kuroppi noted, pocketing her exam pencil before it could be collected.

"Yeah!" Kiiro agreed. "Even _Iruka-sensei_ is better at catching cheaters than those guys!"

Everyone stared at her. Kuroppi glared.

"You didn't copy my test answers in the academy, did you?" she glowered, an aura of rage emitting slowly from her body.

Kiiro laughed. "Don't be silly! I always copy off of Kon-chan since I always sat next to her on the side of my writing hand."

"HA!" Kuroppi said. "You are soooo dead when I tell her!"

"But you're not telling her," Kiiro said, sounding scared. "Are you?"

Kuroppi ran away, Kiiro chasing after her and shouting various words of choice that would have made her mother whack her across the head if she was present. The proctor for thehad to go and grab them, tellin them that the second part of the exam was starting and they needed to go now.

...

...

...

Me: Whew! I haven't updated this in a looong time... I can't get the computer until I do 2 hours of homework as of last week, so that hasn;t helped "

Kuro: Yeah, yeah. Just write more.

Me: I AM NOT YOUR SLAVE!


	13. Kiiro Gets A Clue

"Lemme get this straight," Kiiro said. "We're in this giant, metal maze... which is cold and wet..." she looked at the high walls on either side of her and shivered.

Kuroppi nodded.

"For three days..." Kiiro continued, "So we can attack some random other team... and get a _scroll?_"

"Pretty much," Koneko said. "At least we're not doing this in Konoha. Then this part of the exams would be in the... _Forest of Death._" she shivered.

"What?" Kiiro whined. "No fair! I know that place like the back of my hand and I end up here?"

Koneko stared at Kiiro. "You spend that much time in that... _place_? How did you remain sane?"

"She wasn't sane to begin with," Kuroppi explained.

Kiiro pouted. "C'mon Kuro-chan, I'm not _that_ bad, am I?"

Kuroppi smirked the way only an Uchiha can. "Yes, Kiiro, you are."

Kiiro stuck her tongue out at her teammate immaturely.

"You're being awfully loud," said a voice behind the three.

A foot stepped out from the corner behind them. It was Chigatana, followed by his gennin teammate and Haruno Sakura.

"I'm not Sasuke!" Kuroppi said quickly, backing away from Sakura.

Sakura smiled sadly. "I know," she said. "He isn't even _at _these exams... I wish he was though."

"Yeah, yeah," Chigatana growled. "_Sasuke-kun_ this, _Sasuke-kun _that. Do you ever shut up?"

"That's a good question," laughed another voice. The boy who referred to himself as the Rokubi no Raijuu came around the _other _corner in the gennins' sight.

He smirked. "Is this some sort of party?" He asked. "Shame that the little fox-brat didn't invite me."

"I'M NOT NARUTO!" Kiiro yelled.

Sakura blinked. "What does Naruto have to do with foxes?"

Kiiro looked blankly at Sakura. "Isn't he your teammate? It should be obvious, particularly with those whisker marks on his face..."

"I think Raijuu-wannabe was referring to me here," Ussura said.

Kiiro blinked. "Ohhh... right. Hey, Raijuu-wannabe, aren't you supposed to be with your teammates?"

"My teammates have already secured a scroll of the other type." Smirking bestially, 'Raijuu' raised his arm. "I'm merely _hunting. For you, _Warai Kiiro."

"Hunting?" Kiiro asked. "For _me?_" She blinked. Then her eyes clouded over in what looked liked recognition.

"Sorry," Kiiro said, "I don't really know you that well. And I already have someone I like so..."

"That's not what I meant by hunting," 'Raijuu' growled. "I meant, I tracked you down, to do... this!"

Facing Chigatana, 'Raijuu' brought his arm down hard.

A lightning bolt came out of the (sunny) sky and struck Chigatana.

Chigatana's eyes opened wide and he screamed before falling over facedown onto the ground.

Sakura stared at Chigatana's fallen body, shaking. "How... _How_ did you do that?" she asked 'Raijuu', staring at him. "You... you... _freak!_" she raised her first and smashed the ground so that it _broke _in 'Raiju's' direction. He jumped away, still grinning.

"That boy carries a steel sword," 'Raijuu' explained, chuckling. "That makes him a great deal more conductive than the rest of you. He wasn't my original target, Warai Kiiro is. But..." 'Raijuu' chuckled. "I always test out my _lightning _on someone else before going after the original target. Any last words, Warai Kiiro?"

Kiiro's eyes widened. Instead of running, however, she grinned and bit her thumb.

"_KUCHIYOSE NO JUTSU!_" she yelled, summoning Ussura's older brothers.

Kiiro turned to the others. "It's me he wants, so if you all leave now you have a higher chance of _not dying. _Saku-sempai, take Ussura-chan and Chigatana. Get on Anzentenkou-sama's back and get out of here!" The lighter, larger fox grabbed the three aforementioned... mammals (Ussura is not a person xD) in his teeth and sling them onto his back before running away.

Kiiro nodded at the other fox. "Tanshokutenkou-sama, please take Kuro-chan, Fuyu-san, and Neko-chan far away from here. Kuro-chan, I DON'T CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO ME, JUST GO!"

"Have fun." Kuroppi smirked, waved, and nodded at Kiiro before getting on Tanshokutenkou's back, dragging Koneko behind her. Fuyu leaped onto Tanshokutenkou with canine grace and _grinned_ at 'Raijuu.'

The darker fox took off in the opposite direction to that which his brother had taken.

Kiiro grinned. "You lose, Raijuu-wannabe," she said decidedly. "You shouldn't have asked if I had any more words."

'Raijuu' raised his arm and shook his head. "Warai Kiiro, I hunted you. Now, I will kill you!"

"Good luck with that." Kiiro chuckled. 'Raijuu' gritted his teeth and sent his lightning coming down.

It passed through Kiiro like nothing had happened.

His eyes widened. "How...?"

Kiiro grinned. "Because I'm not real!" she took her arm and passed it through her head-- again, nothing happened. "I'm only a bunshin. You've been _duped, _Raijuu-wannabe!"

Kiiro's bunshin faded into nothing, laughing its head off.

o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

"Kuro-chan, how could you _smirk _while leaving your teammate to die?!" Koneko yelled. "She was all 'go on without me'! And you were all 'have fun'!"

"I didn't leave Kii-chan to die," Kuroppi chuckled. "Actually, she started running away from the scene before this fox, Anzentenkou took off."

"I'm Tanshokutenkou," The fox growled. "Anzentenkou is my brother."

"But 'Anzen' means 'dark,' and you're darker in color," Koneko said, confused, "While 'Tanshoku' means 'light' and your brother is lighter on color! Why aren't _you _Anzentenkou and him Tanshokutenkou?"

Tanshokutenkou grinned. "Because my mom likes screwing with people's heads," he chuckled.

"Moms can be weird that way, I'm told," Kuroppi said. "When Kiiro came back form being dead, she was really pissed that her mom refused to tell her who her dad was, just to mess with her head."

"That's good," Tanshokutenkou said, "It means that if Kiiro becomes a mother herself, she'll be more likely to not keep secrets from her children."

"But..." Koneko blinked. "I still don't get it! What do you mean than Kiiro-chan had started running first?"

Kuroppi smirked. "The Kiiro that you saw was only a clone," she explained.

Tanshokutenkou nodded. "The real Kiiro ran off as soon as she told Kuroppi to go on without her, leaving behind that clone-- and hiding under Kuroppi-san's genjutsu!"

o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Kiiro was nearly out of breath. She'd been tired when started this part of the exams one day ago, she had spent more than a third of her chakra just summoning the twin foxes, and she'd now been running for about three hours straight. She didn't look back for fear of finding that the Raijuu wannabe had found her again.

Rounding a corner, she crashed right into someone. Both people toppled over onto the ground, but since Kiiro had been running and therefore had was more subjected to the property of inertia, she first sent the person to the floor with her over weight, then flipped over on her head and slid five feet.

"Ow..." Kiiro mumbled, getting up as quickly as she possibly could. "That hurt... and now my forehead's bleeding too..." she groaned. "I hope that guy doesn't have a Kiba-like sense of smell."

She started running again, but she was much, much slower this time.

The other person, who was, in fact, _not_ almost completely exhausted, sprung up onto his feet. He reached for a water skin at his side and opened it. Water floated out of it, seemingly of his own accord. Taking _one _of his hands and forming hand seals with it, he muttered: "Hijutsu: Ma Kyou Hyou Shou!"

o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Kiiro saw something ahead on the path she was traveling on, not too far in the distance.

"The tower!" she whispered to herself. Maybe, once she was inside, she would be safe from the boy who called himself Raijuu. She and teammates (wherever they were) wouldn't pass the exams, but they were alive and that was what was most important to her. She picked up her pace slightly, panting. Soon, this would all be over.

Suddenly, a large mirror appeared right in front of her. Kiiro tried to stop before she would crash into it, but once again she ended up tripping over her own feet and went flying forward.

Kiiro winced and closed her eyes. Before she hit the mirror and caused herself seven years of bad luck, however, something grabbed her forearms to prevent her from colliding.

Slowly, shakingly, Kiiro opened her eyes. She looked right into the mirror and saw Haku inside of it. His arms protruded from the mirror, blocking Kiiro from running straight into him.

Kiiro grinned, "Haa-kun," she chuckled. "You gave me quite a scare there, you know. I'm being chased by this guy..."

Haku's eyes widened. "Chased? In what way?" Then, his eyes narrowed. "Kiiro-san, I swear if he tried anything, I'll--"

"Not _that kind_ of chasing!" Kiiro said hurriedly. "He was trying to kill me!"

"Oh," said Haku. "Of course. ... I knew that."

Kiiro chuckled. "You're just as clueless as I am, Haa-kun!" she wheezed, still more than a little out of breath.

Haku blinked. "Me, clueless?"

Kiiro nodded, thought a bit, then shook her head. "Let's just say I'd been trying to hint at something to you."

"Huh?" Haku said. "You have?"

Kiiro nodded. "But I don't think I've been _really_ hinting, since usually when I hint at something I hint too hard and pretty much just _tell _the person what I'm trying to tell them... and you haven't figured it out yet."

"I've had that problem," Haku laughed.

Kiiro grinned. "With people being clueless? Who?"

Haku looked away. "The girl I like," he said, blushing. "I keep trying to tell her, and I've been blaming her all this time, saying she's clueless."

"So just tell her!" Kiiro said.

Haku blushed harder now. _'If only you knew what you were saying, Kiiro-san...' _he thought.

"It's not that simple," Haku said. "Whenever I try to tell her, I end up talking about something else entirely or just 'hinting' again."

"Really?" Kiiro laughed. "With me, I already know the person has someone they like, so I keep my out of it. I guess his being happy when his life has been so hard is way more important than me being more happy, when I'm already happy a good percentage of the time anyway." She gave Haku a thumbs up. "Besides, I'm already friends with the person so I get to spend time with him anyway! A win-win situation!"

"That's an interesting way of thinking," Haku laughed. "I didn't know you have someone you like..."

"Yup-pers!" Kiiro giggled. "Anyway, Haku-kun, what about you? You have someone you like, don'cha?" she winked. "I want you to be happy, Haku-kun. So I will help you!"

Haku blinked. "I don't think..."

"Oh, come on!" Kiiro whined. "Just-- just tell me who she is, and I'll put in a good word for you... wait, do I know her?"

Haku's face grew even redder (it was now about the same shade as Gaara's hair). "Umm... yeah, you know her..." Haku mumbled. "In fact... I think you know her... pretty _well._"

Kiiro blinked. "Ohhh!" She said. "It's Kuro-chan isn't it?" Then, Kiiro frowned. "They _all_ go for Kuro-chan..."

"Don't worry, It isn't Kuroppi," Haku said. "I'm not one of those mindless fanboys who stalks her day and night."

Kiiro thought. "Is it... Aki-sama?" she guessed.

"It's not Aki," Haku said, looking away. "Whatever made you think _that?_"

"Well..." Kiiro giggled. "I don't know about now, but before, at least when I first met you, you were acting like you were her _slave_ or something_. Aki-san, is there a way I can help? Aki-san, I'll do it for you! Of course, Aki-san, I'd be happy to. _Et-cetera."

"So..." Haku said, "In other words, you think I have an individual freedom problem?"

"No, that's not it!" Kiiro said quickly. "I just wish... you'd do more... for yourself. Or accept more favors from others. You should do at least one thing for yourself every day-- take an extra few minutes to sleep, let someone help you with something... you know. You're pretty selfless Haku, to the point where I sometimes _worry._"

Haku stepped out of the ice mirror, but he was _still _holding Kiiro's arms. "Do more... for.. myself?" he asked slowly.

Kiiro sighed. "_Please _tell me this isn't a foreign concept," she said exasperatedly. "I don't want to have to explain it."

"Hmm..." Haku said. "Well, I get the concept. But... one question." He leaned towards Kiiro and rested his forehead on hers.

"Would kissing the girl I like count as doing myself a favor, or her?"

Kiiro's _entire _face turned a very _bright _shade of pink.

"That-- that depends..." Kiiro said. "Who is the girl you like?"

Her eyes lighted up. "I KNOW! It's Neko-chan isn't it? She said she likes a handsome guy who wears a lot of green..."

"It's not Koneko-san," Haku said, a little impatiently. "Think... someone you know..."

Kiiro thought. "Huh... it's a long shot but... is it Kon-chan? She does have a certain cool quality about her... plus she's really smart. Yeah... I can see it now..."

Haku looked Kiiro in the eye.

"NO."

He took the advantage of the fact that his hands were on Kiiro's arms to pull her towards him and kiss her.

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(hahah, you hate me for cutting it off there don't you :D)

"I wonder where the others are," Sakura sighed, still sitting on the large fox demon Anzentenkou.

"They're not that far," Anzentenkou said. "I can hear them-- Kiiro is with Haku."

"Haku?" Sakura asked. "I used to know someone with that name..."

"Maybe it's the same person," Anzentenkou said. "The shinobi world is a small one."

"I doubt that," Sakura laughed. "That Haku died protecting someone. I was there-- the person who killed him was Kakashi-sensei."

Anzentenkou started laughing. "Well, I don't know. You humans have awfully _bizarre_ life cycles..." he skidded to a stop and turned back around. "At any rate, your teammate's not dead yet! I can feel his heart beat faintly against my back. We need to get to Kiiro..."

"Huh?" Sakura asked. "Kiiro's a medic-nin?"

"No," Anzentenkou said lightly. "But you don't have the right chakra nature for what I have in mind. And Kiiro does..."

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"Mmph!" Kiiro said decidedly. Haku broke apart from her, bringing his hands to his lips.

"I'm sorry!" he gasped. "I don't know what came over me..." Haku blushed. "And... obviously, the girl I like is you."

"Yeah, well..." Kiiro giggled. "The guy _I _like is you, so that's okay. I didn't know you liked me though... since you're a quiet, refined, sweet person, I assumed you liked someone less... brutal." she scratched the back of her head embarassedly.

Haku blinked. "Brutal...? Kiiro-san, you're not brutal."

"I'm loud and I'm rude and I enjoy picking in people who are less of something than me! Isn't that, like, the_ definition_ of brutal?" Kiiro said.

Haku sweatdropped. "Maybe... but... that's not all there is to you. You see--"

He was interrupted by the voice of the Raijuu boy.

"Oh, did you think you'd gotten away from me?" 'Raijuu' chuckled. "Warai Kiiro, this is your end!"

He raised his arm. "But first, of course, I'll kill your little boyfriend here to test out my powe--"

"KATSU!" A massive explosion took place directly behind 'Raijuu', exactly far enough away to not kill him, but to still knock him out cold.

Two blacked-cloaked figures appeared in the smoke.

"Looks like we found the six-tails, un."

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kiiro: wait no Neko-chan don't post it! It's not done yet!

koneko: aww come on, it's an awesome cliffhanger.

haku: ... o/o ... did I just do what I think I just did?

me: yes Haku, yes you did. congratulations.

sakura: what the hell did the fox mean right chakra nature? what does he have in mind?

kiiro: I'm not saving Chigatana's life unless you give me your scroll

me: STOP TALKING, YOU'RE GIVING IT ALL AWAY! I don't own Naruto (though I own haku every way but legally) and I don't own Bleach either, even though there's no one from Bleach in this fanfiction and I'm just mentioning it because I'm reading it on Onemanga right now. DAMN YOU AIZEN! Hinamori the li'l cutie with the bun works so hard for you and wuvs you soooooooooo much, and what does she get in return? A BIG HOLE THROUGH HER CHEST!

zabuza: That sounds like your Wave Arc Rant.

me: shut up, mr. oh-hey-i-guess-i-picked-up-something-useful. I don't own nuttin'. Review if you care!


	14. Team Four At The Tower

me: OMG ANOTHER CHAPTER! Just in time for STephy-chan to read it on the plane tomorrow...

kuroppi: yeah, yeah, get on with it!

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"Looks like we found the six-tails, un." The taller of the black-cloaked figures approached Raijuu-wannabe's unconscious body and slung it over his shoulder.

"Hey, un! You two in the corner." The figure pointed at Haku and Kiiro. "He's not going to need it, so would you like his scroll?"

Kiiro stared at the figure suspiciously. "I appreciate you making it so he doesn't kill me and Haku, but who exactly ARE you? And why did you knock him out?"

The figure stiffened. "Um... he... broke a regulation of the exams, un. We're disqualifying him, see?"

Raijuu-wannabe groaned slightly, and the figure knocked him in the head with his fist.

"That's cruel," Kiiro admonished. "What did he ever do to YOU?"

"Nothing," the figure said, seeming apologetic. "But... orders are orders right?" he spoke nervously, fidgeting slightly. "I can't control what they tell me to do, un."

"That makes sense," Kiiro said, "But... why'd you call him the Raijuu-sama? He might be, say, the jinchuuriki, but the only bijuu who can take on human form are Youko-sama, Shukaku-sama and Nekomata-sama!"

"You really _do_ know your demons," the figure laughed. "And yes, this boy is the jinchuuriki, un. But the village always told him that he's the demon reincarnate into human form, so that's exactly what he thinks he is. A demon, un."

"Kinda like the boy who was raised by wolves?" Kiiro said. "Or in this case, lightning-weilding demon weasels." (that's fun to say xD)

"... Yeah, something like that, un," the figure said. "Or whatever, un. In any case, we've got to find that damn Houkou girl and tell her we caught one, un, in case she wants to resurrect it or whatever." the figure walked off to the other dark shape in the passageway, throwing something behind him as he walked off.

"Take it, Kiiro, you might need it un!"

It was a scroll. Kiiro picked it up and giggled. "Yes, I think I will need this, or maybe Haa-kun, will thank you."

Then, she froze. "How'd he know my name?"

"Maybe he's your brother," Haku suggested half-heartedly.

"Ah!" Kiiro said. "You think he's an old flame or something, don't you! I don't even know the guy. Yeah, he might be my brother, though. His voice seems... familiar, somehow. Sorta. Yeah." (a/n: that's a lot of 'yeah's in one sentence...)

"Weird..." Haku said. "You _sure_ he's not an old flame?" he teased.

"Haku, I've never dated anyone before in my life," Kiiro said. "After all I'm only twelve."

"What was it you said before...?" Haku asked. "Something about you being too young too have 'those kinds of feelings'?"

He looked at Kiiro pointedly.

"Yeah, well, that was half a year ago. I'm a big girl now!" Kiiro said cheesily. "Plus I might have spoken wrongly..."

Haku shrugged. "Maybe both. Should we try and find your teammates?"

"That sounds like a good idea..."

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"Well, that was awkward, un," Deidara said to himself. "I didn't expect to run into _her_ while collecting the jinchuuriki."

The Raijuu-wannabe groaned again, and Deidara chopped him in the neck. "Do you ever shut up, un?" he grumbled to the jinchuuriki.

"I don't know about him, but _you_ certainly don't," Sasori growled, scuffling along in his Hiruko puppet suit (because that's what it is. a puppet suit.).

"Hey, un!" Deidara grumbled. "I don't talk THAT much..."

"You certainly talked a lot to that little girl back there..." Sasori chuckled.

Deidara turned around to look Sasori in the (puppet suit's) eye. "That was _Warai Kiiro_," he said flatly. "I had to say _something_."

Sasori froze. "You mean..."

"Yeah, un. _Her._"

Sasori's, or rather Hiruko's, eyes gleamed. "Ah. I _thought_ that brand of ugly looked familiar."

Deidara's face turned an interesting shade of purple, his fists clenching. "_Don't. Ever. Insult my--_"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Sasori said. "Don't get your panties in a wad. Let's go. Leader-san is waiting for us, and as you know I hate to make people wait."

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"So..." Haku said, leaning against the wall, "Do you know where _your _teammates are?"

"Nope!" Kiiro laughed. "I spent a lot of time running away from Raijuu-wannabe. I have no idea where the hell they are now."

"KIIIIIROOOO!" As if on cue, one of Kiiro's foxes (the lighter one, Anzentenkou) ran up, carrying both Chigatana and Sakura.

"Anzentenkou-sama! Saku-sempai! Chigatana!" Kiiro gasped. "Are you all right?"

"Thanks to that little maneuver of yours?" Anzentenkou chuckled. "Perfectly fine. Who knows what that jinchuuriki would've done. Here, help Sakura with Chigatana."

"Oh!" Kiiro ran over to Anzentenkou's side and assisted in getting Chigatana to the ground. "Is he... dead?" Her eyes widened, and she shivered.

"Only almost," Anzentenkou said. "You can help, but we'll need my brother here for that to work."

"Huh?" Kiiro said. "Tanshokutenkou-sama went ahead to the tower in the center of the maze. It was part of the plan."

"Oh, _sh-t,_" Anzentenkou cursed. "Can you summon someone else? I need another kitsune with me for this to work."

"I can't," Kiiro huffed, "I don't have enough chakra left. Sorry..." she looked down. "I'm just not that useful..."

"Damn! What are we going to do now?" Anzentenkou thought a minute. "Wait! I'll just call the nearest kitsune and hopefully it'll help us with this jutsu."

"That sounds helpful," Sakura said sarcastically.

Anzentenkou huffed. "Well, it better be, since it's the only chance we've got!"

He raised his head and let out a high-pitched yipping sound.

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Meanwhile, at the tower, Tanshokutenkou chuckled to himself.

"What?" Fuyu asked lazily, flicking her ears as she watched Kuroppi and Koneko sleep.

"Oh, nothing," Tanshokutenkou said mirthfully, "Just my brother yips like a girl."

Fuyu raised her canine eyebrows. "You all sound like girls to _me_."

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Meanwhile, in another part of the maze, two figures heard the yipping.

"That sounds like Anzentenkou-sama," said the shorter one, a girl with waist-length dark brown hair wearing a sleeveless navy blue chinese-style dress.

The taller one, a carrot-topped boy dressed all in brown, blinked. "It's been a hundred years-- and he still sounds like a girl," the boy noted. "Will that boy ever reach puberty? He's, like, seventeen in demon years."

"I guess his yip is supposed to sound like that," the girl said monotonously. "Anyway, we should probably go assist him with whatever need be."

"What about our little human teammate? Shouldn't we go find--"

"Yousuke-san, _no_." The girl glared at the boy, making her statement firmly. "_That one _is more than capable of taking care of himself. We should attend to Anzentenkou, who needs our assistance"

"But our duty isn't to PROTECT _that one_! It's to constrain him from killing too many people!"

"... Yes," the girl said, still speaking in monotone, "But in his current situation, it seems he won't be able to so much as harm a single person, no matter how much he wants ." She closed her eyes. "From what I can sense... he's with two members of Akatsuki. And he isn't moving. From this, we can deduce that_ that one _has been captured by him and is currently sleeping or was rendered unconscious."

"You mean they managed to get him without killing him?" Yousuke said. "But... he can kill in one hit! How is that possible."

The girl looked blandly at Yousuke. "Well, since that one shoots anyone he thinks will harm him that he sees, we can deduce that they snuck up on him from behind and hit him hard, immobilizing him in one blow, probably with a strike to the head."

"... Woah," Yousuke said, "I'd heard Youki-san was a smart, but that's amazing that you can tell all that just from the fact that he's unconscious."

"And from his general nature and attacking tendencies," Youki said. "If spend enough effort speculating and thinking, rather than wondering, you tend to get better results. Now come, if the Akatsuki have captured our charge then they'll pull his demon out, effectively killing him and securing one of the bijuu in the process. This means that the jinchuuriki won't overuse his power ever again, so we are free to support Anzentenkou-sama in whatever he needs. Is this understandable, Yousuke-san?"

Yousuke paled. "So we're just going to let them kill him?"

"Yes. I will go and assist Anzentenkou-sama. You may do as you wish."

Youki dashed off in the direction of Anzentenkou, and Yousuke closed his eyes, concentrating on the chakras surrounding him.

_'I don't care what Youki says. We've watched _that one_ since the day he was born, and I'm not going to just let them kill him!'_

He found the Raijuu-wannabe's chakra, and took off after it.

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"YIPYIPYIPYIP--"

"Hey Anzentenkou-sama?"

"YIPYIPYI- yes, Kiiro?"

"How can you be sure there's kitsune close enough to hear that?" Kiiro questioned pointedly.

"..." Anzentenkou shrugged. "YIPYIPYIPYIPYIPYIPYIPYIPYIP!"

Speedy footsteps sounded in the maze hallway, and the group was approached by a rapidly running girl with brown hair and a blue Chinese-style dress.

She skidded to a stop in front of the fox, not even out of breath. "Anzentenkou-sama, I heard your call from another point in the maze."

"Ah, Youki-chan," Anzentenkou said, surprised. "Weren't you off restraining some human or something?"

"_That one_ was recently restrained by some people who'll make sure he never hurts anyone ever in the whole of his life," Youki explained, her voice showing no emotions. "The one whom I was working with went after him to try and save his life."

Anzentenkou blinked. "You weren't assigned to restrain the Raijuu jinchuuriki by any chance, were you? Some Akatsuki just captured him."

"One of them knew my name, even though I'd never met him," Kiiro giggled. "Maybe he's heard of Konoha's demon-enthusiast."

Youki raised one of her eyebrows at Kiiro. "You're Warai Kiiro?"

"Woah! You have heard of me!" Kiiro gasped. "I was joking! I didn't think you'd actually... wow!"

"Don't let the fame get to your head," Anzentenkou chuckled. "Youki-chan is actually a kitsune like me. She works in the human world, disguised as a human, for my Grandma Mesu."

"The one who'll say if I can learn demonic jutsu?" Kiiro gasped.

"Yes, Mesu no Kitsune-sama is the one who would judge if a human could learn demonic jutsu," Youki said. "On another subject, why was I called? Unless of course Anzentenkou-sama _just wanted to see me..._"

Anzentenkou laughed. "No, no, I need you to help me help Kiiro heal this guy who's on the verge of death. He was hit by that guy you were restraining, so I guess it's kind of your responsibility anyway."

"Anything for Kyuubi no Kitsune-sama's grandson," Youki said. "So, what are we doing?"

"Kiiro, kneel in front of Chigatana," Anzentenkou said, "We're going to run chakra through your arms and use it to heal him, but you'll need to help channel and direct it or your arms will be severely damaged."

"Okay!" Kiiro said, "I'll do it! Chigatana's a meanie, but if I let him die I'll probably regret it later."

Kiiro kneeled in front of Chigatana on the ground and put her hands on where the lightning hit him. "Kay... now what?"

"Now, Youki's going to turn back into her original form or this won't work," said Anzentenkou in a less than polite tone of voice.

Youki nodded emotionlessly, then momentarily became a ball of green light the size of a large beach ball. Then, she turned into a large fox (her head reaches Anzentenkou's shoulders).

Youki and Anzentenkou both approached Kiiro, whose eyes were closed. She had no idea what they were about to do, but something in the back of her brain told her it was going to hurt like hell.

But she still wasn't expecting the foxes to bite her arms.

"Ouch!" Kiiro yelped.

"Yes, yes, we know, it hurts," Anzentenkou sighed. "But this is how we transfer chakra. Listen, Kiiro, when we put chakra in your arms, you need to push it through your arms, through your hands and into his wound. Got it?"

"Got it!" Kiiro said (wincing because she had teeth in her arms). "Go!"

Anzentenkou and Youki but down even harder than they were already, then began depositing chakra into Kiiro's arms.

Kiiro's eyes widened. "That's a lot of power..." she whispered.

"Yes, we know," Anzentenkou said smugly, though his mouth was full of arm. "Now heal the brat before your arms explode."

"Y-yessir!" Kiiro gathered the foreign chakra in her system and pushed it all out though her hands, along with some chakra of her own.

Chigatana stirred slightly. His breathing became normal, and finally he opened his eyes.

He narrowed his eyes at Kiiro. "You can _already_ summon demons that big?"

"Yeah, but in this case I only summoned one of them," Kiiro laughed, still healing Chigatana's wound. "The other one just happened to be in the area."

"Ah... I get it. But still, you're just depending on the demons, right?"

Kiiro glared. "Hey, this hurts a lot and I'm saving your life! Shut up and let me heal you, or I'll confiscate _all_ of your fancy weapons forever and you'll never be able to do another stabbing jutsu EVER AGAIN!"

Chigatana paled. "Please don't take my pointy things..." he whispered fearfully.

Sakura, who had been standing uselessly against the wall, rolled her eyes. "Okay, okay, now shut up and take a nap. Being healed can exhaust the body and you don't want that." She grabbed Chigatana by the shoulders and dragged him in the direction of the tower. "We already have our scroll so let's get out of here."

Chigatana unwillingly was dragged by Sakura, muttering 'owowowowowow' under his breath the entire time.

"Awww," Kiiro sniggered. "Aren't they cute?"

"The cutest," Anzentenkou chuckled back. "... We're going to let go of your arms now."

"Okay."

Youki and Anzentenkou released Kiiro, and Youki bounded off away from the tower.

"What the hell is she doing?" Kiiro wondered aloud.

"Oh, probably going to help her fellow demon rescue the Raijuu jinchuuriki," Anzentenkou said lightly. "Hey, wasn't that other guy here? The girly one with the long brown hair?"

"I'm right behind you," said Haku, slightly annoyed.

Silence reigned.

"Oops," Anzentenkou said. "Err... I mean... I was... just.. testing you!"

Haku raised an eyebrow. "Testing me on where I was?"

"... Yes!" the large fox said nervously. "Well... err... Kiiro, do you feel all right?"

"Oh, don't worry, it's nothing as bad as leaking stomache acid all over myself," Kiiro giggled.

Haku smiled. "Yes, that did look rather painful..."

"Oh it was, but it was worth it since we got out of here and I got to meet Anzentenkou-sama and Tanshokutenkou-sama! Speaking of whom, I should probably get to that tower and meet them before they start to get worried..."

"Inuzuka Kuroppi, worried?" Anzentenkou said. "I doubt it. Come on, let's go. Girly boy, you should probably go find your teammates if you want to pass this damn thing."

"Huh?" Haku said. "Oh... right... probably. Take care, Kiiro-san, right?"

"I will!" Kiiro gave Haku a hug, and sprinted off in the direction of the tower.

o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

"What took you so long, Kiiro-chan? We were so worried!" Koneko gushed.

"She was worried," Kuroppi sniggered. "I figured you'd be all right. But what _did_ take you so long?"

Tanshokutenkou, resting aside his brother, grinned. "According to Anzentenkou, she was with Haku for an extended amount of time..."

"H-hey!" Kiiro blushed. "That's none of their business!"

"Yes it is," Kuroppi said. "Did he finally have the guts to tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Kiiro asked innocently. She grinned. "Yeah, he told me. YESSSS!" she fell backwards dramatically. "Oh, and we ran into some Akatsuki members."

"Was my brother there?" Kuroppi asked curiously.

Kiiro shook her head. "Nah, Uchitachi wasn't one of the ones I saw. There were two-- a short roundish-looking guy and a blonde guy who knew my name."

"Interesting," Kuroppi said. "I wonder why. Maybe he's your dad?"

Kiiro blinked. "I don't think so. He definitely looked older than me, but not by _that _much. A parent-child link between me and him is pretty much impossible."

"Maybe he's just stalking you or something," Koneko giggled.

Kiiro rolled her eyes. "Yeah, because being loud and demon-obsessed is _sooo_ desirable these days."

"Haku certainly seems to think so," said Aki, walking into the room followed by her teammates.

Haku blushed. "A-Aki-san!"

Kiiro waved, and Haku waved back. Both parties turned red in the face and looked the other way.

"Awww, isn't that cute?" Kuroppi teased.

"The cutest," Tanshokutenkou agreed, grinning maliciously. "Kiiro, can we go home now?"

"Oh, by all means!" Kiiro laughed. "This part of the exams is over."

"We get a training period of one month, then there's a big fat tournament to showcase our jutsu," Aki added helpfully.

"Cool," Kiiro said. "But, if we all passed this exam, then..." she paused. "I'll have to fight at least one of you?"

"Pretty much," Honemashi said. "You got a problem with that?"

"Yeah, you're all too scary. I'd lose!"

"The point isn't to win or lose, it's to show the range and impressive-ness of your jutsu and intelligence" Haku said, putting a hand on Kiiro's shoulder. "It's possible to win the tournament and not pass the exam, or only survive one round and become chuunin anyway. It's all up to the judges who passes and who doesn't-- winning a fight just gives you more chances to show them what you can do."

"... Oh," said Kiiro. "So, I don't have to win if I can make that one fight impressive enough?"

"... Something like that," Haku said. "Not that you should... put on a show or anything. Just show then your resourcefulness and range of jutsu, generally."

Kiiro's gaze slumped to the ground. "Range of jutsu..." she whispered, knowing that she only had one jutsu beyond what one learns at the academy. "Range of jutsu..."

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"Weren't we supposed to bring this to that Hokou chick, un?" Deidara jabbed his finger at the Raijuu jinchuuriki, who was currently tied up on the floor of the large, empty room he was in.

"Technically, yes," said the shadowy figure of the Akatsuki leader from atop a large, ugly statue (yes, THAT ugly statue). "To uphold our end of the bargain. However, what she never finds out certainly won't hurt her."

"She'll figure it out eventually, un," Deidara sighed. "Demons aren't stupid, you know."

The Akatsuki leader blinked. "Have you worked with demons before, Deidara?"

Deidara looked away. "A... a little, un..."

"Can you summon them?"

"N-no, un... but, when I was little, un. I lived with someone who summoned demons. She'd hate to see me now, capturing the bijuu like this." He smiled awkwardly.

"I don't suppose you could find that person?" The Akatsuki leader questioned. "Maybe if we can control the bijuu better, we won't have to use as much chakra to utilize their power."

Deidara glared at the leader. "That person isn't... reachable," he said. "But, if she was, she'd say: demons aren't tools! If you're going to have their power on your side to the fullest extent, they have to be working _with _you, not _for _you!"

"Strong words for someone helping to capture them," Pein said snidely.

"I didn't want to join Akatsuki, remember? You forced me to!" Deidara shot back. He stalked off to his sleeping quarters, muttering things angrily under his breath.

"Sasori," Pein called.

Sasori blinked. "Yes, Leader-san?"

"Is what Deidara said true, or is he merely protecting that person from having to help us control the bijuu?"

"It's true," Sasori sighed. "When Deidara was young, that person knew everything there was to know about demons. But now, that person had a hard time just summoning them."

"Ah," Pein said. "Amnesia?"

"Something like that..." Sasori walked away to follow Deidara. "I'm not sure about the details. At any rate, even if you _were_ somehow able to find that person, they wouldn't be of any help to you."

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"_HATCHOO_!" Kiiro sneezed, slumping against the tower wall.

Kuroppi smirked. "Someone talking about you?"

"No," Kiiro giggled, "I caught something in the maze, since it's cold and damp. _HATCHOO_! If it is just someone talking about me, I wish they'd shut up."

"What happened to Banshou-chan's team?" Koneko said worriedly. "I haven't seen them since the exams started."

"SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFE!!" Banshou yelled, running into the tower with her teammates just before the timer that signified the end of the second part of the exam went off. "Whew, that was close!"

"We had three scrolls at one point, but someone stole all of them at one point so we had to start over from scratch," Daidaiiro muttered.

"Oh dear," Kiiro said. "Well, you're here now right? And you made it!"

Kuroppi's eyes gleamed evilly. "Oh ChiiibiAaaakachaaaaaaaaan..."

"Oh, s--" Akaii turned three different shades of pale in about two seconds. "You two... stay away from me..."

"HUG ATTACK!" Yelled Kuroppi and Kiiro at the same time, glomping Akaii and effectively blocking his windpipe halfway. They let go eventually, and Akaii hid behind Daidaiiro, shivering.

"Well, the exams are over and we all made it," Banshou sighed, still out of breath from running. "Now what?"

"You all _shut up_ and listen to me! I'm the proctor for the third and final section of these exams that will take place in one month!" A loud voice boomed. "HEY! LISTEN!"

"Wasn't Anko-sensei the proctor for the exams at one point?" Kiiro asked Kuroppi, completely ignoring the proctor.

"Yeah," Kuroppi noted, "Kiba-niisan told me about it. Apparently, she cut Uzumaki Naruto's cheek and licked the blood off, then Orochimaru gave the kunai back."

"Haha, nice," Kiiro chuckled. "That gives me funny mental images."

"Exactly," Kuroppi said.

"HEM-HEM! EVERYBODY LISTEN TO ME!" the proctor yelled. "HELLO?"

"Yeah, we're listening," Daidaiiro called. "Even if Kuro and Kiiro aren't."

Kiiro glared at the red-haired Suna-nin (there are way too many of those). "Hey!"

"THE NEXT PART OF THESE EXAMS TAKES PLACE IN ONE MONTH!" The proctor screamed. "IT WILL BE A TOURNAMENT BETWEEN ALL OF YOU!" He threw some confetti on the crowd of gennin, followed by some gel pens. "WRITE YOUR NAME ON ONE OF THESE PEICES OF PAPER SO WE CAN DECIDE WHO WILL FIGHT WHO!"

Everyone wrote their name on a piece of paper, and put it into the fuzzy purple top hat the proctor produced. The proctor mixed the papers up, then drew one out of the hat.

"OKAY! THE FIRST MATCH WILL BE..." the proctor pulled out a slip or paper. "Chigatana Chimaru versus Inuzuka Kuroppi!"

Kuroppi smiled evilly and waved at Chigatana, who shivered.

"NEXT IS... Kaguya Honemashi versus Akasuna no Daidaiiro!"

Honemashi glared at Daidaiiro. Daidaiiro grinned in a very Kankurou-esque manner, and waved back at him. Honemashi decided that Daidaiiro had problems.

"AFTER THAT... Warai Kiiro versus Himaru Aki!"

"No hard feelings when I win, right?" Aki said to Kiiro teasingly.

Kiiro grinned. "No, 'cause _I'm_ gonna win!"

"Is that a challenge?"

"Mayyybe..."

"HEM-HEM! WARAI KIIRO, STOP TALKING! NEXT MATCH IS DETARAME KONEKO versus... HAKU! DON'T YOU HAVE A LAST NAME?"

"Yes," Haku said, "But I don't use it since my family weren't the ones who truly raised me."

"WAIT, I KNOW YOU! YOU TOOK THE EXAMS BEFORE IN KONOHA A COUPLE YEARS AGO, DIDN'T YOU?"

"Yes," Haku said, "And I made it too. But I got demoted awhile back, so I'm retaking them."

"I KNOW THAT! I FOUGHT YOU!" The proctor jumped over to where Haku was. "I WAS THE KID WITH THE SCYTHE! REMEMBER?"

Haku blinked. "Ah, yes, I think I do remember you. You were the also guy with the long religious rituals, right?"

"I STILL AM!" the proctor said proudly. "JASHIN-SAMA IS PLEASED!"

"Ah," said Haku, sweatdropping, "Good for him... what was your name again?"

"IT'S HIDAN, YOU MOTHERF--ER! DON'T FORGET IT AGAIN!"

"Don't worry, I won't. And," Haku turned to Koneko, "Let's have a good fight, okay?"

Koneko nodded. "Let's!"

"WELL THEN!" Hidan roared happily. "THE NEXT MATCH IS BETWEEN HARUNO SAKURA AND DOUBUTSUYAMA AKAII!"

Sakura looked at Akaii, eyeing him to judge how strong he was. Akaii grinned sheepishly.

"THAT LEAVES ONE MORE PERSON--" Hidan pulled the remaining slip of paper out of the fuzzy purple top hat. "KASSHOKUSUNA NO BANSHOU! YOU'RE FIGHTING WHOEVER WINS THE FIRST MATCH, SO THAT'S EITHER CHIGATANA CHIMARU OR INUZUKA KUROPPI!"

"Wheee," Banshou said sarcastically. "I wonder which one will win?"

"Yeah, good luck fighting Kuro-chan," Kiiro said. "Don't worry, she probably won't use Mangekyou on you. She only does that when she really, really needs to, since it's bad for her eyesight."

"Plus, it gives me a headache," Kuroppi sighed. "So, no, I probably won't scar you for life."

"Hey!" Chigatana said. "Don't you guys think I might win?"

Everybody looked at him.

"No," they all said. "You can't win this one."

Chigatana glared at them. "I'll win, you'll see!" He turned his back on them and sat in the corner, refusing to talk to anyone.

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"Well, that was rather interesting," Kiiro said, plopping down on the couch. "So, someone different is going to train each of us for the exams?"

"Aki got sensei," Honemashi said. "I got one of my neighbors, and Haku got someone who was part of the seven shinobi swordsman."

"That seems a little unbalanced," Kiiro noted. "Are the people who assigned your teachers just more eager for Haa-kun to pass or something?"

"I doubt that," Haku said. "I betrayed the village, remember? The people who are training us all _volunteered._"

"Mine didn't," Kiiro huffed. "Tsunade-sama herself had to _threaten _Hatakashi to get him to come and train me. Hey, who did everybody else get?"

"I'm getting trained by Kankurou-sensei," Daidaiiro noted. "Akaii gets one of his older cousins. Banshou's not telling us who her trainer _is. _ But apparently, their wagon got stuck in traffic so they won't be here until tomorrow anyway."

"I got Maito Gai!" Koneko said cheerfully. "Hey, Banshou who _is _your trainer?"

Kiiro blinked. "You got Gaito-san? Woah, _nice_."

"And I _still_ don't know who's training me," Kuroppi sighed. "And apparently 'm meeting them here. So, it must be someone really strong and not from this village."

"Pray to god it isn't Orochimaru," Kiiro giggled. "He might be after your sharingan, especially since you've got a sharingan more advanced than your brother Sasuke."

A knock sounded at the door. "Is Inuzuka Kuroppi-san here? I need to take her to meet her sensei for this month." A child's voice sounded at the door- probably a gennin

"Coming," Kuroppi yawned. "Should I bring anything?"

"He only said wear close-toed shoes and warm clothing," the child's voice said hesitantly.

"But who is _he_?" Kuroppi sighed, pulling on a pair of black rain boots and a dark blue sweater. "I still don't know who I'm training under."

"He'll tell you when we get there."

"Of course." Kuroppi rolled her eyes and opened the door. The person who had been calling her was a tall girl about their age with straight brown hair parted to the side. "And you are?"

The girl smiled. "I'm Miki. Since I didn't make the second part of the chuunin exams, I'm back to missions."

"Transporting Kuro-chan is a gennin-level task?" Kiiro grinned. "Kuro-chan, they're totally underestimating you."

"I know," Kuroppi said. "But since this person is taking my to me trainer, I have no choice but to follow her. I'll be back soon, probably. See you guys later!"

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"Your trainer is waiting for you in here." Miki opened the door of a dark room. "I'm not allowed to enter."

"Where are we exactly?" Kuroppi was blindfolded so she wouldn't know where they were taking her. She was beginning to think maybe her trainer _was _Orochimaru.

"We're underground," Miki said. She wouldn't say anything more, just pushed Kuroppi into the darkened room. "Good luck."

The door was shut and locked after the Inuzuka-Uchiha, who didn't know since she was wearing a blindfold in a nearly pitch-dark room.

Miki went a few yards down and opened another door.

"Pein-sama?" she ventured quietly.

A shadowy figure in the corner turned to look at her. "Ah, Miki. Did you complete your mission?"

"Yes, Pein-sama." Miki smiled. "I delivered the girl to her trainer."

Pein nodded his hard-to-see head in approval. "I see. And as for your teammates?"

Miki turned behind her, smiling. "Genmetsu (disillusionment) no jutsu, kai (release)!" she said softly. The space behind her seemed to bend, and two people appeared: a short girl with shoulder-length wavy brown hair, and a dark-skinned boy with his black hair parted to the side in the 'emo boy' style.

"Erika, Ikkakujuu. Did you figure it out?" Pein questioned, raising his shadowy eyebrows.

"Yes," The girl, Erika, said. "The child seen with them, though she has spiky blonde hair and blue eyes, is _not _the jinchuuriki. Uzumaki Naruto is still out training somewhere with Jiraiya of the Sannin."

"Interesting," Pein said, "So, it was just a likeness? Nothing more?"

Erika shrugged. "Maybe they're related, Pein-sama."

"Hmm..." Pein said. "Possibly. But we can't assume that everyone with blonde hair and blue eyes is related. Though it would explain Deidara's absolute loudness."

"You would have a point there, Pein-sama," Ikkakujuu said. His voice had an interesting, lilting quality to it, because he was originally from one of the islands off of Wave.

"Well, Ikkakujuu?" Pein questioned. "Any further analysis?"

"Yes." Ikkakujuu nodded. "They all had really weird names, Pein-sama."

"Don't spit your random facts like that just because you feel like it!" Miki hissed. "This is Pein-sama you're talking to! Plus, your name means 'unicorn' so you're totally not one to talk!"

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"Hello?" Kuroppi called. "Can I take off the blindfold now?"

"No, but _I_ can," a deep voice sounded behind her. Kuroppi couldn't quite tell who it was, but it seemed familiar.

"Have we met?" she asked.

The blindfold was removed. "Okay, Reiko-chan. Can you see me in this darkness?"

"My name isn't Reiko," Kuroppi hissed. "No matter what anyone else says, I'm Inuzuka Kuroppi."

"Ah, Reiko-chan. If I don't call you by your real name, who will?"

Kuroppi gasped. "Itachi!"

"That's right." Uchiha Itachi put a hand on Kuroppi's shoulder. "I'm going to train you for the third part of the exams..."

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me: FINALLY DONE! I'm working on my three big fics in a cycle these days: a chapter of this, a chappie of Ask the Hosts, a chappie of the Dance of the Flower Petals. With a couple oneshots here and there, meaning drabbles and/or Akatsuki Holidays. (I really need to write more of those...)

kuroppi: you really aren't good at updating things, even in the middle of Sumemr vacation, are you?

me: oh shut it, my friend from Utah is visiting this week. LOVE YOU ELIZABETH! I KNOW YOU'RE READIN THIS OVER MY SHOULDER AS I TYPE! EVEN THOUGH THIS FANFIC IS NARUTO AND YOU DON'T READ NARUTO!

kuroppi: ... sure... weirdo... hey, why is Itachi training me?

kiiro: I have no idea! and what the hell was with that guy who explodes thing?

me: you guy's just have to wait for the next chapter. oh, and deidara's just werid like that. he blows up EVERYTHING.

gaara: you said it.

me: now, everybody who cares that much, review! pleeeeease?


	15. Team Four's Inquiries

Me: aaaaaaaaaaaand it's up! I love summer... it means I can write these things almost nonstop...

Kuroppi: yeah, yeah, just start the damn chapter already! Last chappie ended with a me-centric cliffhanger!

Me: all right, all right. no need to yell...

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"That's right." Uchiha Itachi put a hand on Kuroppi's shoulder. "I'm going to train you for the third part of the exams..."

"Really?" Kuroppi asked. "Whew! The way everyone was keeping it a secret from me, I thought it might be Orochimaru or something..."

Kuroppi felt Itachi's hand tighten slightly on her shoulder. "Please don't compare me to that homosexual rapist," he said stiffly.

"Sorry," Kuroppi laughed. "I won't. So, what kind of training, exactly, are we going to do?"

Itachi let go of Kuroppi's shoulder, then appeared in front of her. In the pitch-dark room, all she saw was his red Sharingan staring directly at her,

"We're going to train your eyes."

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"Stupid Hatakashi," Kiiro mumbled crossly. "He tells me to meet him in this rusty, damp park, but three hours after the appointed time he's STILL NOT HERE!"

Kiiro was sitting in the middle of an empty all-metal children's playground waiting for Kakashi, who was to train her for the third part of the chuunin exams. But, as usual, Kakashi wasn't on time for Kiiro's training-- in fact, she would be surprised if, this time, she showed up at all. He certainly hadn't so far-- this was the fourth day of the training month and Kakashi hadn't showed up once.

"I AM SO SICK OF THIS!" Kiiro screamed to no one in particular

"I have an idea," Ussura suggested from her position in Kiiro's lap. "Mesu-baachan just decided that she'll let you learn some demonic jutsu."

"But-- I was told to stay here! What if he does come this time, and I'm not here? The others might get worried--"

"You don't need to go anywhere to have my grandmother train you," Ussura interrupted. "Just close your eyes and open your mind."

Kiiro blinked. "What?"

"Mesu-baachan has a knack for telepathy," Ussura explained. "You see, if you think about letting her into your mind, she'll talk to you. You might even be able to see her."

"So, just think about her?" Kiiro asked.

"Yup!" Ussura giggled. "She'll pull you into you mind-- to others, it'll seem like you're asleep. If anyone who needs to talk to you approaches, I'll just bite you and wake you up. Deal?"

"Deal..." Kiiro said, closing her eyes. _'Mesu-sama? Are you there?'_

A powerful voice filled Kiiro's head, and though her eyes were closed, a dim orange light appeared in her vision.

_**'I am anywhere I please to be. You are Warai Kiiro, are you not?'**_

___'Yeah, I'm Kiiro.'_

_**'Good. Now, you wish to learn demonic jutsu, correct?'**_

___'YES.'_

_**'Well, then, Let me warn you-- demonic jutsu focus not just on your chakra, but also on your youki, you demonic energy. All humans have a tiny, miniscule amount of youki-- after all, no being is without a small amount of evil.'**_

__Kiiro giggled mentally. _'No one's perfect, right?'_

_**'Exactly. Now! I want you to focus on yourself. Do you feel it?'**_

___'That depends,' _Kiiro thought skeptically. _'What exactly am I supposed to be feeling?'_

_**'The little flicker of darkness in your soul. There's a faint light in the middle of it-- try to draw it out.'**_

___'Won't that make me more evil?' _Kiiro pointed out.

_**'No-- it won't affect you in any way. The amount of youki has nothing to do with the amount of evil, and the amount of evil is just something you are born with. It's not important.'**_

___'Right... so... looking for a light at the end of the tunnel?'_

_**'If you want to call it that.'**_

__Kiiro focused, looking for what is was that Mesu was referring to.

She gasped. _'I found it!' _

_**'Good. Now, draw it out of yourself, and see how far you can stretch it.'**_

__Ussura grinned. _'Oh, good, she found her alright. I think I'll just leave now... watching Kiiro talk to someone in her head will get annoying.'_

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"Ouch." Kuroppi rubbed her sore eyelids. "Headache..."

"The Mangekyou sharingan is taxing," Itachi agreed. "The headaches will come until it decides to take away your eyesight. When that time comes, you will need to rest your eyes for awhile after the battle, as well as looking into getting yourself some contact lenses."

"No, thank you!" Kuroppi hissed. "Just... get me an an aspirin or something?"

Itachi nodded curtly, before leaving the darkened room through the rectangle of light that was the door.

"Man..." Kuroppi sighed. "I wonder if there's any way to reverse this..."

"There is," said a dark voice as an orange, swirly mask poked itself in the door from the hallway. "But I don't think you could go through with it. Someone who managed to cheat her way into gaining the Mangekyou sharingan..."

"Oh?" Kuroppi raised an eyebrow. "What this terrible crime I'd have to commit?"

"I don't feel like telling you," the masked figure said airily. "Ask Itachi about it-- he contemplates it more often than I do." He started to walk away.

"WAIT!" Kuroppi yelled. "Who are you?"

"My given name is Uchiha Madara," the masked man said. "But, if you're smart, you won't tell anyone about my existence. Address me as Tobi."

"Sure..." Kuroppi said slowly. _Uchiha Madara? I'm pretty sure he's supposed to be dead..._

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"Deidara-sempaaaai!" called a voice far to hyper for someone of Tobi's age-- whatever that was.

Deidara stiffened slightly, but continued walking as if nothing or no one had ever addressed him.

Tobi didn't realize this, and ran right up to the blonde-ponytailed man. "Deidara-sempai! Deidara-sempai! You'll never guess who's here?"

"...Who?" Deidara asked slowly. Maybe if he humored Tobi for a little bit, the masked idiot would leave him for alone.

Tobi took a big, noisy breath. "ITACHI-SAN'S LITTLE SISTER IS HERE!!"

Deidara's face turned bright white. "What... did... you... say?" he asked fearfully, his entire body twitching. "Itachi's... sister... you mean... Inuzuka Kuroppi? the Sharingan Queen?"

"Well, I've never been called THAT before," a smug, female voice said. "Where's you hear me called _that?_"

Kuroppi was standing in the hallway, holding a glass of water-- the more mature of her blood-related brothers standing like a sentinel behind her.

Deidara let out a small squeaking noise.

"Well?" Kuroppi stepped slowly towards Deidara. "Did you come up with that nickname yourself, or did you hear it from Kiiro-chan? Because apparently, you somehow knew her name..."

The closer Kuroppi got to him, the harder Deidara trembled.

"I... I just..." Deidara paused. _Think fast dammit! _She _can't find out about... _"I... heard it from Itachi!"

Itachi glared at Deidara. "No, you didn't. I never said anything of the sort."

"Y-yes you did! B-but you were drunk! So y-you... don't remember it!"

Itachi raised an eyebrow. "Really. _ I don't remember drinking in front of you_... you're_ lying,_ Deidara. Badly."

Deidara smiled nervously. "You don't remember because you_ were already drunk when I got there_!"

Itachi smirked evilly (does he smirk any other way?), taking a step towards the blonde. "I doubt that strongly, Deid-"

Kuroppi held out her hand in front of Itachi, so as to stop him. "Nii-chan, he's lying to _me_, not you. _I'll _handle this."

Approaching Deidara, Kuroppi looked up and locked eyes with him.

"Mangekyou sharingan!"

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_'Wow. I didn't know I had that sort of power,' _Kiiro huffed, taking deep breaths. _ 'Amazing.'_

_**'Your... fascination with my kind seems to have made your personal youki stronger,' **_Mesu noted thoughtfully. _**'I haven't met, seen or heard of human so interested in us before! Maybe, when you die, you could become a demon yourself...'**_

_'I'd love that!' _Kiiro gushed mentally. _'Oh my gosh I'd love that SO MUCH! ... But I died for awhile recently, and while it was certainly a very enlightening experience, I'd rather stay alive for another eighty years or so.'_

_**'You're a ninja,' **_Mesu chuckled. _**'It'll be closer to sixty. If you're that lucky. Well, I think that's all the training your soul can take for today. If you sit down for awhile, though, you'll be able to train with normal jutsu just fine, since it's not your body, but you spirit that is so tired.'**_

___'Okay, good to know, thanks! ... About the tired-soul thing, though... how do I rest that?'_

_**'The same way you rest your body. Sleep.'**_

___'That makes sense. Thanks for teaching me, by the way.'_

_**'That was only the tip of the iceberg. Once you can fully access your youki, I'll teach you to manipulate it. From there, you can learn some akkiton (demon style) no jutsu, which are stronger than human techniques, for the most part.'**_

___'...Wow! That'll probably take years and years of training, but it sure as HELL sounds worth it!' Kiiro cheered. 'Thank you so much, Mesu-sama!'_

_**'You are welcome, and you may call on me again anytime as long as it is after the next time you sleep, and I'm not busy with my duties as the Second Ranked Kitsune in all the world. Speaking of which, I have a meeting to attend... Farewell, Warai Kiiro, until our paths cross again.'**_

___'See ya then. And again, thanks!'_

Kiiro sat still for a few minutes to rest herself, breathing deeply, then got tired of not moving and started doing chin-ups on the monkey bars that were conveniently there.

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"Mangekyou Sharingan!" Kuroppi said, and it seemed to Deidara that darkness swirled out of her eyes and swallowed him whole.

Suddenly, Deidara was on what looked and felt suspiciously like a torture rack, wearing a shirt that showed his midriff.

Kuroppi stood above him, holding a giant feather. She held it in front of herself menacingly, and Deidara winced.

The Uchiha grinned. "Do you know what I'm going to do with this?" she asked, bopping Deidara lightly over the head with the feather. "Do you?"

Deidara gulped and shook his head, wincing.

"Hmmm..." Kuroppi noted. "Your face tells me other wise. Well, then, since you're obviously _asking_ for it..."

She brought forth the feather and held it barely a centimeter above Deidara's bare stomach. "How did you get the name 'Sharingan Queen?' And if you work with Itachi, who's stronger than I am and better at using his eyes, not to mention more ruthless with them, then why is it that _I_ seem to scare you so much?"

"Where... I come from..." Deidara said shakily, "You're... well known."

"What, Iwagakure?" Kuroppi asked, using the feather to flick Deidara's headband.

Deidara nodded.

"You're lying again," Kuroppi said teasingly. "I can see it in your face..."

She started tickling Deidara with the feather. "You better tell the truth!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHA-You wouldn't -HAHAH- believe the -HAHAHA- truth even -HAHAHAHAH if I -AHA- TOLD YOU!" Deidara laughed under the duress of Kuroppi's (expert) tickling, though her gritted his teeth.

"What was that?" Kuroppi held the feather a loft, paused her barrage of tickling motions. "I'm warning you, I can make Kiba-niichan pee himself in three minutes of this treatment."

"I said," Deidara repeated, "You wouldn't believe the truth even if I told you."

"Oh?" Kuroppi said. "I've believed a lot of things... if I didn't, I'd probably be locked up somewhere in Orochimaru's lair."

"Because you wouldn't have killed Warai Kiiro?" Deidara said quietly.

Kuroppi's eyes widened. "How'd you know about that?" She asked slowly. "I didn't even tell Itachi-niisan how I got my mangekyou! Since Kiiro's..."

"Not dead?" Deidara said. "I know. You don't want him to be too jealous of you, that your best friend is still alive and his is long dead, even to the point that your little friend Aki couldn't save him."

"Itachi's friend is six feet under," Kuroppi said. "... And who told _you_ about Kiiro-chan? Did you stalk Aki for _that_ long?"

Deidara shook his head. "I know more about Aki-- or Kiiro, or Kon-chan, or _you, _or some other people in your age group-- more than _Leader-san_ will ever find out."

"And why is that?" Kuroppi chuckled.

Deidara only shook his head a second time. "I can't tell you, even if you tortured me again-- and even if I did, it's so far-fetched sounding that you wouldn't believe it."

Kuroppi put her feather down. Deidara sighed in relief...

Then, tensed again when the adopted Inuzuka pulled out a very large dead fish.

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"Kiiro-san? What are you doing out so late?"

Kiiro grinned from her position at the chin-up bar. "HAKU! ... Hey, you're out this late too, aren't you?"

The long-haired boy smiled, holding something behind his back. "I'm going back to the room from training, but you're training _still_. So, technically, unless you leave soon, you're out later than me. ...And whatever happened to _'Haa-kun'_? Have we become that distant that you won't give me a nickname, when even Orochimaru gets one?" Haku teased.

Kiiro laughed apologetically. "Well, I got that nickname off of someone else's nickname in a manga I was reading, so I figured I could probably get you a better nickname if I thought hard about. You're not like that character at all, you see... not really."

Haku smiled. "Hatsuharu from _Fruits Basket_, right? I suppose I don't have quite the temper..."

"Yup!" Kiiro giggled. "But, Hatsuharu-san can be calm at times... and you're a _Champion of Calmness!_"

"Champion of Calmness?" Haku laughed. "I don't know about that... it just takes a little more to set me off than most. When I do get set off, though, I end up doing things I wouldn't do usually."

Kiiro grinned. "Really? Like what?"

"Well... when you thought I liked Kon-san, that set me off," Haku said quietly. "Remember what I did there?"

Kiiro blushed. "Yeah, I remember... HEY! You mean you wouldn't have done that usually?" she teased.

"No... but it would've taken me longer to work up the courage," Haku admitted.

"Ah, that makes sense. So... would you do it again?" Kiiro's blush darkened.

Haku smiled. "I would." He brought his hands out from behind his back to show that he was carrying two sticks of dango. "And aren't you hungry if you've been here all day?"

"True..." Kiiro eyed the dango greedily. "Say, Haku.. would you mind terribly much if I took one of...?"

"Why do you think I bought them?" Haku held out a dango stick to Kiiro, who took it smilingly.

(and, according to spell check, _yes_. that is a word. _smilingly_.)

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SLAP

SLAP

SLAP

SLAPSLAP

SLAPPITYSLAPSLAPSLAP!

"Well?" Kuroppi twirled the dead fish in one (gloved) hand. "Are you ready to talk now?"

"I said..." Deidara growled, "You wouldn't believe me anyway!" His face was red from constant fish-slapping. He was obviously still scared of Kuroppi, but he was also angry-- you would be too, if you were trapped in a genjutsu that made it feel like you were being slapped with a fish for hours on end, when in reality you knew only a few minutes had passed.

"Oh, really?" Kuroppi chuckled. "Try me. Unless you want me to up the torture a bit..." She laid the fish down and started to pull something else out from behind her back.

Deidara paled like he had when he'd first seen Kuroppi.

"No!" He pleaded. "_PLEASE-DON'T-MAKE-ME-WEAR-_THE_-DRESS!_"

"_'The_ Dress'?" Kuroppi said. "What dress? I've never made anyone wear a dress while using this jutsu..."

"Well, un, you haven't thought of it yet!" Deidara said nervously. "But you will! In a few years, you will, un!" His eyes widened, as if he'd just said something he shouldn't have. "Shouldn't have told you that..."

Kuroppi blinked. "And why would you know that? Are you psychic or something?"

"... Yeah, un! Unbelievable, right?" Deidara laughed. "Told you you wouldn't believe me..." he trailed off, his eyes darting from side to side.

Kuroppi smirked. "I don't-- you're still lying. Come on, tell me the truth... or I'll try to think of _'The Dress'_ a few years before you think I will." She shot Deidara her best 'Uchiha Death Glare' (trademark).

"Oh, fine," Deidara sighed. "It's impossible to keep anything from you anyway. _The truth is, I'm..._"

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"I found her!" Haku yelled, dragging Kiiro into the hotel room that his team, her team, and Banshou's team were sharing.

"Oh, good," Banshou laughed. "We were worried she wouldn't come back. So, did Kakashi actually show up this time?"

"Nope!" Kiiro said. "Hatakashi's still out doing... whatever the hell he thinks is more important than my becoming Chuunin! So, I trained under _Mesu-sama!_"

"No way!" Koneko said. "You mean Ussura's grandma?"

Kiiro grinned. "Yup! You better believe it!"

"You sounded like Naruto there..." Kuroppi sighed. "You sure you're not him?"

"I'M NOT NARUTO!" Kiiro yelled.

Kuroppi smirked. "I know, it's just fun to mess with your head..." she massaged her temples with her fingers. "Though I've done plenty of messing with people's heads today, anyway... more than I can stand..."

"Have you been training your _Mangekyou Sharingan, _Kuro-chan?" Koneko gasped. "You probably shouldn't... it's bad for your eyesight, right?"

"Not yet. For now, it just gives me killer headaches. _Anyone got an aspirin?_"

Kiiro raised her hand. "I've got some advil..."

"Give it here!" Kuroppi said quickly.

Kiiro scurried to her room, grabbed a bottle of pills, and ran back out.

"Don't take more than four," she instructed, "It's not healthy."

"I know," Kuroppi growled, swallowing three. "I was the one who told you that, remember?"

"Oh, I remember," Kiiro laughed. "I was just mocking you. I'll go put these away now..." she started to exit the room, but she tripped on Honemashi, who was sleeping on the floor.

Honemashi sat up slowly and _glared_ at Kiiro.

"I was talking to someone," he growled. "And now I'm not tired enough to go back to sleep."

Kiiro blinked. "Huh? Oh, right, the talking-to-dead-people thing... I forgot about it."

"Since we don't usually show off our zombie-ish powers, sometimes people forget about them," Banshou laughed.

"BANSHOU-CHAN, YOUR _ARMS_!" Koneko screamed. "THEY'RE GONE!"

Banshou regarded her armless sides. "Oops. Was meaning to re-grow those."

There was a _popping _noise, and Banshou's arms grew back at an alarming pace.

"He was _right_," Banshou giggled, "If I wait awhile to heal them, they heal faster. Waddaya know!"

"_Who_ was right, Banshou?" Daidaiiro asked, looking up form the puppet he was fixing. "Your extremely elusive sensei for the exams?"

Banshou giggled. "I'm not allowed to tell you..."

Daidaiiro frowned. "Why noooot?" He whined.

"Because I'm not," Banshou said, "And besides, I don't want to tell you anyway. Does it matter?"

Aki, who hadn't said anything since Kiiro and Haku walked in, raised her head from the scroll she was reading. "Banshou, is your trainer...?" she trailed off, but raised her eyebrows with significance.

Aki and Banshou locked eyes, and Banshou nodded.

"Do I want to know?" Kiiro asked.

Banshou grinned. "I'll tell you all after the exams. But for now, I'll just let you wonder..."

Aki looked up from the scroll she was reading. "It's Gaara, isn't it?"

Banshou blushed. "... You got me..."

"Ehhh? You got the Kazekage as your trainer?" Kiiro gasped. "That seems slightly unfair..."

"That's why I wasn't allowed to tell anyone," Banshou said. "I was going to tell you all, after the exams. But now the cat's out of the bag..." she frowned. "Oh, well..."

"Hey, at least Kazekage-sama probably shows up on time," Kiiro giggled. "That's the most annoying part, to me! I'm jealous of ALL of you!"

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"Hey, Deidara," Sasori said, stepping into the break room. "If _she's _here, what are you going to do? I know she's not exactly fond of Akatsuki's goals..."

"Exactly why I didn't want to join," Deidara grumbled. "But stupid Pein _had_ to send stupid _Itachi_ to fight me for it..." he pouted.

"Are you moping?" Sasori asked. "Like a little kid?"

"_You_ shut up!" Deidara threw a couch cushion at Sasori's face. "And I'm _not_ moping!"

"No, you're not," Sasori agreed. "You're throwing a temper tantrum. And you're a grown man, Deidara. Snap out of it."

"No!" Deidara refused, sticking out his tongue (very maturely, of course) at Sasori. The blonde man stomped out of the break room and out of the hideout.

Sasori chuckled. "Pay up, Zetsu."

The plant man oozed out of the wall. "No, he didn't blow a raspberry at you, she just stuck out his tongue. No one pays anyone anything."

"Damn!" Sasori muttered. "I was sure I'd get it that time, too! Oh, well..."

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"Hatakaaaashiiiiii!" Kiiro called, approaching the park. "You better be here this time!"

He wasn't.

But someone _else_ was.

A blonde someone, huddled up under the jungle gym. They were shaking slightly, making sobbing noises.

"Are you okay?" Kiiro said, approaching the stranger against her better judgement (no street smarts, that one). Before she knew what she was doing, she had thrown her arms around the man in a hug.

"You alright?" Kiiro asked.

The man looked away. "I'm fine, un..." he muttered.

"Anything you want to talk about?"

"Not really..." The man sighed.

"Okay," Kiiro said. "... I should probably let go of you, since I don't know who you are."

"... Yeah, probably," the man laughed weakly. "I'm Deidara, by the way, un."

"Warai Kiiro," Kiiro said. "Hey... weren't you the guy who gave me that scroll? Or was that some other guy with blonde hair and a speech impediment?"

"No, I'm pretty sure that was me, un," Deidara said. "... And you can let go of me now."

"Right." Kiiro let go of him slowly. "Sorry. Actually, I have no idea why I did that. Ever get those random impulses to just _do _something?"

"Must've been your maternal instincts, un," Deidara mumbled.

Kiiro shook her head. "Babies hate me. I doubt that I have _any _maternal instincts at all," she grumbled.

"Babies hate you?" Deidara asked incredulously. "But... that's impossible, un! Babies love everybody!"

"Okay, maybe I'm just no good with them," Kiiro said. "But whenever I hold one, it starts _crying_!"

"I was crying when you hugged me, un," Deidara pointed out. "Does that make _me _a baby?"

"A very big baby," Kiiro said sagely.

Deidara laughed. "Only to my mother."

"Well, good for her. Guess this means I can't call you a baby..." Kiiro giggled.

Deidara just laughed.

Kiiro stood up. "Well, I really should get to training... hmm. I need to give you a nickname. Deidara, right? What's your other name?"

Deidara only stuck out his tongue... the one on his right hand.

Kiiro stared. "Amazing..." she muttered. "How'd you get those on there? Some sort of surgery?"

"Nope!" Deidara said. "I was born with them. All four of them."

"Four?" Kiiro gasped. "That's fascinating! Is that a bloodline?"

"No, just a mutation. By the way, I think you're just about the first person to _not_ be extremely shocked about my hands."

"Well, I'm not much if not open-minded," Kiiro noted. "Well, nice meeting you, I guess. Even if you are an Akatsuki."

"I didn't join of my own free will," Deidara said. "Most of us didn't. Remember that, un."

"Kay," Kiiro said, skipping over to the shade of a tree, where she closed her eyes and seemed to fall asleep.

"Training with Mesu-sama, un," Deidara chuckled to himself. "But it doesn't look like training at all..."

"It doesn't," a voice behind him agreed.

Deidara turned around. "Kuroppi-san! How much of that did you see?"

"All of it," Inuzuka Kuroppi admitted, jumping down from a branch in a tall tree. "I saw you sitting at the park where Kiiro-chan's doing her training, so I wanted to see what would happen if you two met. ... Are you going to tell her?"

"Not really, un," Deidara laughed. "That would be an extremely awkward conversation."

Kuroppi smirked. "I know. ... Hey, why _were _you crying?"

"Nothing, un," Deidara sighed, "Just feeling homesick. Seeing all you guys again, though you're all so many years younger, did that to me. But 'home' is a place I can't go to anymore... un..."

"Because it's several years in the future, so no one you know would be there?" Kuroppi guessed.

"Yeah, that too, un," Deidara sighed. "The main thing is, the building I was born in isn't built yet..."

"That must be weird," Kuroppi laughed.

Deidara smiled weakly. "You don't know the half of it... Kuro-sensei."

Kuroppi's eyes widened. "What?"

Deidara smirked and used a Transportation Jutsu to disappear in a swirl of leaves.

"Damn it..." Kuroppi muttered. "No wonder he knows me so well..."

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_**'Warai Kiiro.'**_

___'Yes, Mesu-sama?' _Kiiro asked curiously. _'What is it?'_

_**'Your youki manipulation is... satisfactory. The battles you're currently training for are in a week, correct?'**_

___'Yes... why?'_

_**'I'm going to teach you a technique.'**_

__Kiiro fell over. _'Really?'_

_**'Yes,' **_Mesu said irritatedly. _**'I make it a point not to lie to my pupils, even if they are human like you are. Now, gather your youki and send it to you forepaws...'**_

___'You mean hands?'_

_**'Shut up. You know what I mean.'**_

___'Yes, Mesu-sama...'_

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A hawk landed on the windowsill of the hotel room. The man staying in the room, an old man with white hair, picked up the hawk gingerly and took a roll of paper off of its leg.

_Jiraiya, _the letter began, _I have a mission for you._

_There are some things we've kept secret from your student for far to long..._

Jiraiya's eyes skimmed over the letter, and he grinned.

"Naruto!"

The blonde trying to sleep on the couch looked up wearily. "What is it, Ero-Sennin? I'm tired from todays training..."

"Pack your bags, brat! We're going to Amegakure!"

Naruto sat up abruptly. "WHAT? Why?"

"To see this semester's Chuunin Exams!"

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Kiiro: ... WOAH! Sixteen pages? A fifteenth chapter? w00t! Shashuko, you're on a roll!

Me: Don't get used to it. I'm starting high school next week.

Kiiro: ... What! falls over That's... scary...

Me: I know!

Kiiro: but can't you do another chapter before then?

Me: I doubt it. I'm doing a chapter of 'Dance of the Flower Petals' next.

Kuroppi: why'd Deidara call me 'sensei'?

Me: I dunno. Next chappie will contain Naruto in it! Plus. the third part of the chuunin exams!

Chigatana: I'm against Kuroppi... I'm so DEAD...


	16. Team Four's Tournament

me: auuuggh I'm taking forever to write this, sorry.

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"Well, here we are," Kiiro said nervously. "The Amegakure Arena! Let's-- let's all fight our very best, right?"

"I'm doomed," Chigatana whispered. "Even if Kuroppi doesn't activate her sharingan, I'm doomed."

"Yeah," Kiiro said. "But, if you make that one fight good enough, and show good techniques and judgement skills, you might make chuunin anyway. Unless of course you were just going to give up?"

"I'm not giving up!" Chigatana yelled. "Just you wait and see! I'll beat Kuroppi, and then I'll last long enough to beat _you_! But see if you last that long..."

"Only if I'm lucky," Kiiro giggled. "I'm fighting Aki-sama, remember? I'm pretty much doomed. But I'm going to try my hardest!"

"Don't worry," Aki said quietly. "I won't come down on you _too_ hard."

"Woah!" Banshou said. "Was that Aki-chan making a threat?"

"I think it was," Kiiro giggled. "But, since I already knew I wasn't going to win, that's all right."

"You don't think you can win?" Haku asked. "I bet you could."

"We'll see," Kiiro huffed. "It must be easy being super strong like you. Neko-chan doesn't stand a chance either."

"Eh?" Koneko said. "This guy is that strong? He doesn't look it..."

"Well, he doesn't seem straight either," Daidaiiro said. "And since he likes Kiiro, we're pretty sure he is."

"Hey!" Kiiro said. "Waddayou mean 'pretty sure'? Don't insult Haku like that!"

"Are you really one to talk?" Daidaiiro chuckled. "When you first met him, _you_ thought he was gay too..."

Kiiro glared. "Yeah, well, first impressions can be misleading, obviously!"

"Not always," Haku said. "I thought you were cute. And I was right."

"Well, I didn't say _always are_, I said _can_-- oh." Kiiro blushed. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it," Haku said.

"... Hey, where's Kuroppi?" Chigatana said. "If she was here she would've said something to scare me more."

"Her exams-sensei had her come by the arena earlier," Kiiro said, "For some last-minute advice. She's already there! So don't think of worming your way out of this fight."

"You just want to watch him get beat up," Honemashi said.

Kiiro grinned. "Maaaaybe... since he was all almost-fatally injured and stuff before I wasn't able to beat him up myself during the second part of the exams. I would've felt guilty about kicking him when he was down."

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"Hey, Ero-sennin." Naruto pulled Jiraiya's sleeve. "Why are we going to see the chuunin exams?"

"There's something you need to know," said Jiraiya. "But I have to tell the other person involved, and she's _taking_ the chuunin exams. You'll get to see her fight."

"Really?" Naruto asked. "A girl? Who?"

"You may have heard of her," Jiraiya chuckled. "Her name's Warai Kiiro. The self-proclaimed demon enthusiast."

"Demon enthusiast?" Naruto froze. "Does this have something to do with that bastard fox?"

"Surprisingly, not really," Jiraiya said. "I doubt that subject will even be brought up. Now, come on. I wanna get good seats for the exams!"

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Itachi cleared his throat. He and his little sister were in the center of the Arena, waiting for the others to appear.

"Yes?" Kuroppi said. "Come on, the others won't take that long to get here."

"Don't overuse your sharingan," Itachi said. "Reiko-chan."

"Wow... you're worried about me, aren't you?" Kuroppi smirked. "I guess you do have feelings after all."

Itachi smirked. "Reiko-chan, that's a cruel thing to say to your older brother."

Kuroppi smirked back. "I must be a cruel person. Also, don't call me 'Reiko-chan.' My name is Inuzuka Kuroppi now. I might be your sister, but Kiba-niisan and Hana-neesan are my siblings too."

Itachi sighed. "I suppose that's my fault..."

"I suppose it is," Kuroppi said. "Thank you. Bugging Kiba-niisan is some of the most fun I ever have."

"KURO-CHAAAAAAAAN~!" Kiiro ran into the arena and met her teammate with a flying hug. "Good luck in the exams! Not that you'll need it..."

"You're right, I won't," Kuroppi said smugly, scratching Fuyu behind the ears. She nodded at Itachi, who disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

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"ALL RIGHT!" Hidan said from the commentator's box. "WELCOME TO THIS YEAR'S AMEGAKURE CHUUNIN EXAMS! FIRST UP IS INUZUKA KUROPPI VERSUS CHIGATANA CHIMARU!"

"That's Kiba's sister..." Naruto gasped form his place in the bleachers. "I didn't know she was going to be here!"

Kuroppi stepped into the arena, waving at the crowd. Chigatana also stepped out, but he was shaking slightly.

Naruto frowned.

"What's wrong?" Jiraiya asked. "Old girlfriend?"

"No!" Naruto said. "For a second, I thought she looked like Sasuke! That's all..."

"That's not surprising," said a voice from the row behind him. "Most people think she _is _Sasuke..."

"Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto yelped. "What are you doing here?"

"I was supposed to train Warai Kiiro for the chuunin exams..." Kakashi said boredly. "But she reminded me of _you_ so I skipped out."

"Hey!" Naruto said. "That's a stupid reason! What if now she stands no chance of winning?"

"Oh, I doubt that," Kakashi chuckled. "I hear she's pretty gutsy."

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"GO KURO-CHA-- AH-AH-_ATCHOO!_" Kiiro sneezed. "GO KURO-CHAN!"

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"Don't worry," Kuroppi said. "I'll go easy on you... Fuyu, this'll be easy. you can take a nap."

Fuyu nodded and fell asleep on the side of the arena.

"I won't hold back!" Chigatana said nervously. "Right?"

Kuroppi smirked. "I think you're talking to yourself."

"I WANT A GOOD, CLEAN FIGHT!" Hidan yelled from his box. "FROM BOTH OF YOU!"

Chigatana pulled the sword at his waist out of his sheath. "Come at me!"

Kuroppi smirked. "No."

"W-why not?" Chigatana asked angrily, though his knees were shaking. "Are you s-scared?"

Kuroppi rolled her eyes and threw a kunai lazily at Chigatana. He barely managed to deflect it with his sword.

When the kunai bounced off of Chigatana's weapon, though, he smirked (even though his knees were still knocking together).

"That sword..." Kuroppi narrowed her eyes. "It has some lame-ass special ability, doesn't it."

"You're right!" Chigatana said, sounding more frightened than triumphant. "The second your kunai and my sword touched, your kunai was hit with chakra fire! If you p-pick up that knife again, you'll be roasted alive!" Which, from Chigatana's voice, would not be a good thing. "S-So you better not touch it."

"Hmm..." Kuroppi flicked a small shuriken at the sword, and it bounced off too. "So this works with all types of metal?"

"Y-yes..."

"Well, then." Kuroppi reached into her kunai holster and pulled out a large, folded-up piece of steel. "Let's see how it stands up to this fuuma shuriken!"

She unfolded the giant 'windmill of death' and swung it as hard as she could at Chigatana.

He put his sword in front of the shuriken, but it still spun around the sword and swung into Chigatana's face, making a deep cut on his cheek.

"Ah... ah..." Chigatana's eyes widened in fear. "Antidote! Right!"

Shakily, he reached into his kunai holster and pulled out a little purple bottle. "Stop... the burning..."

Kuroppi lazily jogged over and swiped the bottle from Chigtana's hands. His entire cheek was blackened now, and the wound was making sizzling sounds.

"It's over," Kuroppi said. "Give up."

"I give give up! I forfeit! Now give me the antidote before the burning reaches my eyes!"

Kuroppi handed over the bottle to Chigatana, who rubbed the purple goop inside on his face. The burning stopped and his skin returned to its normal hue, though blood still poured through.

"WINNER OF THIS MATCH..." Hidan yelled into the megaphone, "INUZUKA KUROPPI! I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN AN INUZUKA FIGHT WITHOUT THEIR DOG BEFORE!"

This yelling woke up Fuyu, who growled at Hidan. Hidan whimpered.

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"I don't get it," Naruto said. "What happened."

"She took advantage of the sword's ability," said a monotone voice in the row behind him. "Since all metal that touches the sword heat up to the point where it can burn skin, Kuroppi had her shuriken touch the sword, then Chigatana himself. Exactly what I would have done."

"And who are _y_--" Naruto turned to face the speaker. "Oro... orochi..."

The speaker's eyes narrowed. "I am not, nor will I ever be, that bastard pedophile Orochimaru. My name is Hebitsukai Kon."

"She's not a boy either," said Anko cheerily from beside Kon. "But she sure does look like one!"

Kon glared at Anko. "Shut _up, _sensei."

Anko stuck her tongue out at her student. "No. Keep speaking like that and I'll put you through another solitary hell-week."

Jiraiya's eyes widened. "You've been using that training method? Wasn't that one of Orochimaru's--"

"It works, doesn't it?" Anko giggled. "Besides, unlike Orochimaru, _I_ watch from a hiding spot when I trap my students in the Forest of Death."

"It's still the Forest of Death," Jiraiya pointed out. "Not safe for children."

"Well, mine can handle it," Anko shot back.

"Sensei, we're your students, not your offspring," Kon sighed, pulling out a copy of a book titled _The Sasori Code_. "Stop referring to us as such. Kuroppi's adopted, Kiiro's an orphan but she met her real mother when she was dead, and I've got... _that_ man. Unfortunately."

"Yeah," Anko giggled. "Sucks to be you."

Kon punched her sensei not-too-lightly in the arm, not once looking up from her book.

"THE NEXT MATCH..." Hidan yelled, "KAGUYA HONEMASHI and AKASUNA DAIDAIIRO!"

Kon closed her book. "Honemashi and Daidaiiro are beating each other up? That might be interesting..." She grinned. "Kukuku..."

"Hey, Anko," Naruto whispered. "Are you sure she's not Orochimaru?"

"We're sure," Anko whispered back, "Sort of. It's complicated."

o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Daidaiiro and Honemashi stepped into the ring.

"Hey there, short stuff," Daidaiiro said, smirking.

Honemashi sighed. "You have problems," he said.

"MATCH COMMENCE!"

Daidaiiro pulled out a scroll. "Come on out!" Two puppets came out of the scroll: a little girl in a black dress, with a black ponytail and a blonde boy with a huge, striped top hat, sporting a large scythe.

Honemashi blinked. "Those look familiar..." he said quietly. "... No matter. I will win."

He pulled a blade of bone from his shoulder. "Puppets can never be quite as good as a seasoned warrior."

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Naruto gasped. "He's-- he's-- I thought the last Kaguya was Kimimaro!"

"Technically, yes," Anko said lightly. "But Honemashi-chan is friends with Aki."

Jiraiya's eyes widened. "Himura Aki? The Houk--"

"Yes, her," Anko said. "That's why you brought Naruto here, isn't it? To meet little Aki-chan?"

Jiraiya's brow furrowed. "No, he's supposed to meet Kiiro."

Kon narrowed her eyes at Naruto. "You are Kiiro are awfully similar," she noted. "... No good can come of this meeting."

"WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING?!?" Naruto yelled. "WHY SHOULDN'T I MEET THIS PERSON!"

"Because," Kon sighed, "I left my earplugs back in Konoha."

"HEY, YOU--"

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The black-attired puppet charged at Honemashi. Honemashi rolled his eyes and stabbed it through the middle with the bone blade, which was long enough that the puppet's arms couldn't reach him.

Suddenly, a bug-like attachment sprung form the puppet's stomache and bit down on Honemashi's shoulder hard.

"That's Maria's hidden weapon," Daidaiiro said loftily. "Of course, if you were a little _bigger_, then her little baby there wouldn't be able to get you. So I guess we can thank Aki for that."

Honemashi gritted his teeth. "It's not... _her_ fault... she'd never brought anyone back before..."

"Ah, but if she hadn't screwed up you'd be taller now, wouldn't you?" Daidaiiro teased. "And then maybe you'd be tall enough to ask her out..."

"WHAT THE $^%%*%$^% DID I JUST SAY?!?"

Bones burst out of Honemashi in all directions, destroying the puppet Maria completely and piercing Daidaiiro himself in several places.

Honemashi stood in the center of the ring, huffing and puffing. "Whatever mistakes... Aki-chan made... I don't mind. I'm still alive, aren't I?"

"Yeah," Daidaiiro chuckled. "And look on the bright side! Since you'll be eight years old the rest of your life, you won't ever have to worry about not being able to sing as well as you used to because your voice changed!"

"YOU!!!" Honemashi yelled.

The second puppet, the one with the top hat and scythe, flew at Honemashi. He made a plate of bone on his arm and blocked the puppet, who pulled out his scythe and took a swipe at Honemashi.

Honemashi jumped away barely in time, and the scythe cut through part of his clothing.

The Kaguya boy rolled his eyes. "I've had enough of this tomfoolery. FINGER BULLET DRILL!"

Daidaiiro was peppered with tiny pieces of bone from Honemashi's fingers.

"Give up, or it gets worse," Honemashi said flatly, growing a long needle-like bone from each finger. "You are Banshou-san's teammate, so I don't particularly want to hurt you."

"Why does that matter?" Daidaiiro chuckled, his voice losing volume quickly. "Banshou isn't even from your village."

"Yes," Honemashi said, "But we among Aki's saved. Those of us that Aki-chan brought back from the dead... are the closest I have to family."

Daidaiiro frowned. "That... makes no se... nce..."

He fainted from blood loss.

"You wouldn't get it," Honemashi said. "You've never died."

"THIS MATCH GOES TO HONEMASHI!"

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"I still don't get it..." Naruto said. "How is he alive if Kimimaro was the last Kaguya?"

"Well..." Kon said. "You should ask Kiiro about it. She probably knows more about it than I do."

"Why does Kiiro keep coming up in this conversation?" Anko noted.

Kon smirked. "Because she's an idiot."

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"UP NEXT--" Hidan looked at his script. "--HIMURA AKI VERSUS WARAI KIIRO!"

"Hey Aki," Kiiro said as both girls entered the arena. "If I win, will you buy me dango?"

"Sure," Aki said, "But if you die you have to buy me an ice cream."

"... How can I buy you an ice cream if I'm dead?"

Aki raised her eyebrows. "Well, obviously I'm not gonna let you _stay _dead. I'm not that heartless."

"Nah, you're right. But if you bring me back, I'll owe you another ice cream. So I'll buy you two on separate occasions. Deal?"

"That seems fair."

"MATCH, COMMENCE!"

Aki stared at Kiiro.

Kiiro stared at Aki.

Aki stared back at Kiiro.

"... Well?" Kiiro said. "You coming at me, or am I coming at you?"

"Doesn't matter. You wanna go first?" Aki said casually.

"Sure." Kiiro shrugged. "Why not? ... Hey, Aki?"

"Yeah?" Aki asked.

"Can we not do little testing-each-other jutsu and just cut to the chase with jutsu that are at least medium-level? I haven't had lunch yet and I wanna eat."

"_**Silly little Kiiro,**_" said the voice of the Houkou. "_**Always thinking about her stomache. Aki, the power's all yours. Beat her quick, I'm hungry too.**_"

Aki smirked. "Well, then! Let's finish quickly so Houkou doesn't complain in my head too much."

"Agreed." Kiiro took a low stance, with her fingers crooked like claws. "Let's go. _Kitsune-tsume_!"

Fire-like chakra glowed around Kiiro's fingernails, which grew longer and sharper.

"So that's what Mesu-no-Kistune taught you," Aki said. "Your nails are sharper, and anything they slice will burn. You're probably faster using this technique too, because you're drawing on youki as well as chakra. Well... here's something that Houkou taught me!"

The air around Kiiro grew heavy, warm and moist. Vines crept out of the ground and started slithering up Kiiro legs...

"So... sleepy..." Kiiro's eyelids started to droop.

"NO KIIRO!" yelled a voice from the stands. "DON'T FALL FOR IT! IT'S OBVIOUSLY A GENJUTSU!"

Kiiro didn't know that voice, but it seemed familiar somehow. Like it was a voice she'd known when she was very small...

Her eyes snapped all the way open. "You think burning thing is the only thing my new claws can do? Genjustu-sakeme no jutsu (illusion tear technique)!"

Kiiro's fingers burned brighter, and she brought them in front of her and slashed at the air.

At the places where the kitsune-tsume touched, a giant hole appeared in Aki's genjutsu. Kiiro jumped through the hole and ran to deal Aki a blow before she could put the illusions back up.

Right before Kiiro was in striking distance, though, Aki disappeared.

"Aki-sama?" Kiiro called, looking around her. "You're not above, to the left or to the right... you must be below! But I can jump faster than you can dig!" She started leaping at random to various places in the arena.

A kunai hit Kiiro in the back, near her left shoulder blade.

"Silly Kiiro..." Aki's voice echoed all over the stadium. "I'm not under you, I'm all around you."

"That simply impossible!" Kiiro yelled. "Unless of course you somehow have Haku-kun's bloodline... and you've got the mirror thingies out but you used a genjustu to hide them..."

"You're getting warmer," Aki teased. "But I can taste that ice cream now. You can't see me, you're as good as dead."

"Well, damn," Kiiro said as another kunai hit her in the front of her right calf. "If we keep this up, I won't be able to move around much, and I'll be a sitting duck. More so than I already am. One thing to do, I guess, would be... _San-nin_ _Kuchiyose no Jutsu_!" (three-person summoning technique!)

Kiiro's thumb hit the ground, and three foxes jumped out.

"I still say that technique is cheating," Anzentenkou sighed, licking his light orange paw. "One drop of blood between the three of us. Demons use you humans' blood as money, you know!"

"Plus," Ussura chuckled, "We like seeing you suffer if it's something tiny like that. What Aki-chan's up to, though..."

"Is a bit harsh." Tanshokutenkou clicked his tongue is disapproval. "Really. Can't you just knock her out using that techinque?"

"Ah," Aki's voice echoed. "That I could. But if I just do that, Kiiro won't try at all. You came to this fight expecting to do your best, but lose, didn't you?"

"Yeah," Kiiro admitted sheepishly. "Besides, Haku will probably beat Neko-chan, so if I win this I'll have to fight him. Which would suck, since we only realized we liked each other about thirty-two-and-a-half days ago. You see my dilemma?"

"Well then," Aki said. "If you don't figure out at least how to be able to see me again, I'm gonna keep throwing pointy objects at you until you can, or can't. in that case, though, you'll die. And I'll make you buy me a really expensive ice cream once you're resurrected. So hurry up and figure me out!"

"Sounds like you're pretty bored," Kiiro giggled. "Well, lessee. You're the Houkou jinchuuriki..."

"Obviously."

"And the Houkou's element is 'illusion.' If I can't see you, and your voice is echoing everywhere... I must be trapped in another genjutsu! _Genjutsu-sakeme no jutsu_!"

The hole wasn't visible to Kiiro this time, since the genjutsu looked the same as her surroundings, but she stepped though where she'd slashed to find Aki facing her.

"Well then," Aki said. "As bargained, I'll knock you out fairly painlessly and you won't have to die again. That wasn't so hard, was it?"

"Nope," Kiiro said. "But ummm..."

"Yes?"

"I'm a bunshin."

"WHAT?!?"

The real Kiiro, who had dug underground after slashing a whole in the genjutsu... _under_ her, jumped out of the ground and dropped the strongest axe-kick she could into the front of Aki's shoulder.

Aki crumpled to the ground, but she slowly stood up...

An explosive kunai hit the ground in front of her.

"Aki-sama..." Kiiro sighed. "I know you can do more than that..."

"Don't. Call me. -Sama," Aki said through gritted teeth. "I have no control or jurisdiction over you."

"Yes, but I do owe you my life," Kiiro giggled, ducking to dodge a kunai thrown at her, "I call you 'sama' as a way of thanks. I respect that you're a kind, honest person. If I die and you bring me back again..." the blonde grinned. "You'll be Aki-_hime_."

"I'm not a p-princess!" Aki stressed, clearly mortified by the idea. "If you want to thank me, just thank me! Don't go all crazy!"

"Why not?" Kiiro said. "I mean it with the utmost respect and only a little bit of mockery..."

Aki sighed exasperatedly. "Listen, Kiiro, do you _know_ how--"

But before Aki could finish her sentence, Tanshokutenkou (who had snuck up on Aki while Kiiro distracted her) kicked her in the head with his foreleg, knocking her out.

"_**I give up**_," the Houkou said, using Aki's body to speak. "_**I promised Aki I'd let her finish this fight by herself.**_"

"AND THE WINNER IS... WARAI KIIRO!" Hidan said, somewhat suprisedly into his megaphone.

"WOOT!" Kiiro jumped up and down, before turning to Aki.

"Hey, Hokou-sama, is Aki okay?" Kiiro whispered worriedly. "I didn't concuss her or anything, right?"

"_**She's fine**_," the dog demon chuckled, "_**Just sleeping. Which I think I should be doing, myself...**_"

And Aki's body finally lay silent.

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"Woah..." Naruto said. "Was Aki... a jinchuuriki?"

"She still is," Kon sighed, rolling her eyes. "Kiiro wouldn't have the guts to kill Aki. She'd consider that... 'un-honorable' or something. If Kiiro hadn't distracted her like that, though, Aki would have won... Kiiro needs to learn to fight others seriously or she'll die again."

Naruto blinked. "Again? I thought you could only die once..."

"Yes," Kon said, "But-- nevermind. It doesn't concern you. And I'm not sure I'm supposed to discuss that with people who have nothing to do with it."

Jiraiya chuckled. "I used to know a little boy like you," he said, "But then the little boy's parents died and he turned into a pedophile."

Kon's eyes widened, and she gave Jiriaya one of the best glares she had ever unearthed in public (because we all know she practices glaring at mirrors). "Who... are you comparing me too?"

_S... Scary... _Sweat ran down Jiraiya's face. "N... no one, umm... Hey Naruto! We need to go now! You have... um... go... to... to meet that girl who just fought!"

"What? Oh! You mean Kii-"

Jiraiya grabbed Naruto and rushed him out of the spectators' section of the stadium.

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Kiiro sighed, sitting down in the competitors' area. "I actually beat Aki-sama... Wow..."

"And you looked good doing it," said Haku, sitting down next to her.

Kiiro blinked. "... Aren't you supposed to be out there, fighting Neko-chan?"

Haku smiled awkwardly. "Hidan's running a halftime service..."

The words 'DO THE WAAAAAVE!!!' echoed through the hall, coming from far away.

"He's so full of _energy,_" Kiiro laughed, putting her head on Haku's shoulder.

He wrapped his arm around the blonde girl's waist. "Yes, but that trait is much cuter on _you. _Especially since you're not an Akatsuki member..."

"Don't judge people based on what group they're a part of," Kiiro said gently. "Some of them joined against their will, I've been told. And I met one of them once who was adorable."

"Adorable?" Haku smiled awkwardly. "Really?"

"Yeah!" Kiiro giggled. "I think he said he was seventeen years old, but he looked just like a baby."

"Really, a baby?" Haku said. "...Is he a friend of yours?"

"Nah, I just talked to him once. He was surprisingly polite, for an S-Classed criminal, too." Kiiro grinned. "If I ever have a kid, I hope they're that nice."

"For some reason, I find that hard to imagine," Haku laughed. "You as a mother, that is."

Kiiro grinned. "Why is that? Think I couldn't get married? Or that I just couldn't _get_ any?"

"No! That's not it at all..." Haku blushed and looked away. "You just don't act much like someone who'd grow up to settle down and become a housewife that easily."

"I'd probably still do the ninja thing if I wasn't on maternity leave," Kiiro said. "Hire a sitter or make my husband, whoever that would be, watch them while I was on missions."

"Sounds like you have everything planned out," Haku said, smiling amusedly.

Kiiro sighed. "Yeah, now that I think about it, I might be too young to make plans like that. I shouldn't get married 'till I'm at least nineteen or twenty..."

"You're probably right about that," Haku said. "How old would you have to be to get engaged?"

"Eighteen or nineteen," Kiiro said in sagely tones. "So I'd be less likely to be getting married over just an infatuation."

"... Is that what you have for me?" Haku said slowly. "An infatuation?"

Kiiro blushed. "Well... that's what it was at first. Right now, it's either a _really big_ infatuation, or maybe the roots of actual love. I'm only thirteen, I don't think I'm capable of romantic love quite yet. Puppy love, maybe."

"Well..." Haku gave Kiiro a kiss on the forehead. "As long as I get to spend time with you, that's good enough for me."

"You're too kind for your own good," Kiiro mumbled, returning the kiss on the long-haired boy's cheek. "I'm being pretty brutal with you here. Hey... the sounds of Hidan being obnoxious are dying down. You should probably go out and get ready to fight Neko-chan..."

"Probably," Haku sighed. "And if I win, I'll have to fight you in the next round."

Kiiro grinned. "Yup. Loser buys the winner dinner?"

Haku smiled and said, "It's a date."

With that, he got up and walked in the general direction of the ring.

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"She should be somewhere around here..." Jiraiya said. "Naruto, we're looking for a blonde girl about your height. Actually, from what I'm told, she looks a lot like you... minus the whisker marks."

"Okay," Naruto said, "Why do we have to find her again?"

"There is something I have to discuss," Jiraiya said slowly, "With both you and her."

Naruto gave Jiraiya a funny look. "She's not my secret-fiancee-since-birth or anything, right?"

Jiraiya laughed. "Thankfully, no. If you and her got married and had a kid, that would be one weird baby. Come on, let's go look for her..."

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Kiiro was sitting in the part of the arena where those participating could watch the fights. Haku's fight was about to start, and so she was a little jittery.

"Oi! You!" A male voice yelled, startling her. She fell over and landed on her side.

"... Yes?" Kiiro asked slowly, standing up an rubbing her shoulder. Her eyes widened. "Ji- Ji- Jiraiya-sama! I've wanted so long to meet you!"

The writer of the Icha Icha Paradise series smirked. "Thank you. If only this brat could show the same respect."

Jiraiya jerked his thumb at Naruto, who scowled.

Kiiro grinned. "You're... _Naruzumaki_, right?"

"W-WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!?" Naruto yelled. "MY NAME IS NARUTO! UZUMAKI NARUTO!"

Kiiro grinned. "I give people nicknames, sorry. The only way out of it is to become one of the 'kages. I guess, in your case, that'd be if you were Hokage. And I didn't give nicknames to the Densetsu Sannin-- they're the three biggest summoners, and I want to be the best, so I have to respect them."

"Even Orochimaru?" Jiraiya said suspiciously.

"At first, yes," Kiiro sighed. "But then I met him in person and he and I didn't get along very well, so... he gets a nickname like everybody else. So now he's Ororo-chan."

"Ororo-chan..." Jiraiya broke out laughing.

"Hey!" Naruto said. "I _am_ gonna be the next Hokage! So don't give me a nickname!"

"Until you become Hokage, or I can think of a better nickname, you are, to me, Naruzumaki. Trust me, I don't let anyone get out of this. They all get one." Kiiro smiled almost apologetically. "So, what're you two here for? I've got a couple guesses but I'm probably wrong. Does it have something to do with the whisker marks on Naruto's face?"

"... I don't think so," Jiraiya said. "Actually, I don't know why they're there in the first place."

"Neither do I," Naruto said. "...Do you?"

"They're Jinchuuriki markings," Kiiro said. "They're proof that you contain the Kyuubi-sama."

"... Did you just give the suffix _'-sama'_ to the thing that killed your parents?" Jiraiya said disbelievingly.

Kiiro made a face. "Kyuubi-sama was _drunk_. He didn't know what he was doing, consciously. Demon sake is extremely potent, and he's probably still hung over."

"No wonder he was so grumpy when I talked to him," Naruto chuckled. "So, Ero-sennin, if it's not about the bastard fox (Kiiro winced), why are we here?"

"Well..." Jiraiya sighed. "I need to talk to both of you kids. Privately. You see-"

"THE NEXT MATCH WILL NOW COMMENCE!" Hidan roared into his megaphone. "DETARAME KONEKO versus HAKU! READY... FIGHT!"

Kiiro turned away from Jiraiya and Naruto. "Can this wait? These guys are my friends. Actually, so is pretty much everybody fighting today."

"It can wait," Jiraiya sighed. He and his pupil both sat down next to Kiiro, who giggled with excitement.

'_I can't believe this. I'm sitting between one of the strongest demon-summoners of the age and the jinchuuriki of Ussura-chan's grandmother, I get to watch Haku-kun fight, and I finally get to see Neko-chan's fighting style!'_

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Haku stepped into the ring to the usual cheers-for-bloodshed that accompanied fighting at the chuunin exams, and someone yelling:

"EHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!? WASN'T HE DEAD DATTEBAYO?!?"

Haku turned to see the speaker, to see one Uzumaki Naruto look to the left, to right right, and point suspiciously at the girl sitting next to him, who happened to be Kiiro.

"Good luck!" Kiiro yelled, with a bit of choked laughter in her voice that was directed at Naruto.

Haku smiled at Naruto and Kiiro, waving to them, then turned to face Detarame Koneko.

Hidan smirked in to his megaphone. "MATCH... COMMENCE!"

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Koneko shivered. _'According to Kiiro, this guy is pretty strong... I'm not that good...'_

Slowly, she took her fighting stance.

Haku's eyes widened. "... Koneko-san... who taught you that stance?"

"Hatake Kakashi..." Koneko said shakily. "Why?"

"N... no reason..." Haku said slowly, shaking his head, taking a stance of his own.

They stood there for about thirty seconds, not sure what to do, until Haku rolled his eyes and ran at Koneko.

Appearing behind her, Haku roundhouse kicked Koneko in the back of the head, sending her into the wall.

Koneko bounced back off the wall and sent several kunai at Haku, which he dodged easily. The older boy flicked a senbon at Koneko, hitting her in the shoulder.

She tried to move her arm.

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"He-- he died!" Naruto yelped. "Almost two years ago! I was there-- I saw it!"

Kiiro's eyes widened. "Really? You know Haku-kun?"

"Yeah... How do _you _know him?" Naruto asked suspiciously.

"Me? I met him about half a year ago. His team and my team were chasing tthe same target, it turns out."

"Really, dattebayou?" Naruto asked. "Who?"

"Yakushi Kabuto," Kiiro laughed, "My team was trying to get at him because he stole a chocolate formula, and Aki's team-- which Haku was on-- was trying to get at him because Kabuto killed Aki's brother."

"Oh," Naruto said. "I guess that makes sense, HOW IS HE STILL ALIVE?!?"

"Aki-chan?" Kiiro called down the hallway. "Can I tell him?"

"No!" Aki yelled back. "I'll tell him, later!"

"Kay then, I won't tell you," Kiiro giggled. "Let's just watch the tournament for now, mm-kay?"

Naruto grumbled in his seat.

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"My arm!" Koneko gasped. "Why won't it move?"

"Because I paralyzed it with those needles," Haku said quickly, "Like this!" He hit Koneko's other shoulder.

Koneko growled and shook herself so a kunai fell out of her holster, then picked it up off the ground with her teeth.

Haku launched more needles at Koneko, who dodged this time and started shifting her weight from one foot to the other, causing her arms to swing.

"I can still move my fingers," she huffed, swinging her right hand onto her left arm and holding it there with her right hand.

Energy crackled around Koneko's left hand, nearly invisible at first.

Haku's eyes widened as the cat-eared girl began to charge...

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(Haku Flashback)

"Please kill me..."

The mist was cold and thick around him, but he could see Naruto standing in front of him, frowning sadly. As the other boy charged Haku, the water vapor lightened a little, to show him the man charging his adoptive father.

_Zabuza-san...! _Haku raised one hand to block the kunai aimed for his face.

"Sorry Naruto, but I can't die just yet!"

Using a transportation jutsu, Haku launched himself in front of Hatake Kakashi.

And all there was, was pain. The lightning of the copycat ninja's chidori seared through Haku, burning through his ribcage.

"Zabuza... san... " Somehow, Haku managed to grip Kakashi's arm before the pain became blackness that consumed his vision...

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Haku stood frozen. He needed to move, or Koneko's chidori would hit him. Why couldn't he? Haku's body was as frozen as the ice mirrors he conjured.

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"Gee, that's the same attack that killed him," Naruto said. "But why is he standing like that. He looks kinda... scared..."

"The attack that killed...? Of course he's scared, you idiot!" Kiiro yelled. "Things associated with the way you die will always be frightening!"

Naruto rolled his eyes. "And how would you know--"

"SNAP OUT OF IT, HAKU!" Kiiro yelled rather loudly. "YOU'RE BETTER THAN THIS! WIN THIS FIGHT AND--"

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As previously discussed, Haku was paralyzed with fear as Koneko ran at him with the attack that had previously brought out his untimely demise.

He could see nothing but the lightning snapping around Koneko's fist, smell nothing but Koneko's glove burning, feel nothing but the heat that radiated off of it. He could hear nothing save the crackling of the chidori--

Until Haku heard Kiiro.

"SNAP OUT OF IT, HAKU!" she yelled, her voice echoing in the long-haired boy's head. "YOU'RE BETTER THAN THIS! WIN THIS FIGHT AND-- AND I'LL... UMM..."

Haku swatted Koneko to the side as if she were a bug. "Yes?"

"I'LL... ummm... WIN AND I'LL SHOW YOU!"

Meanwhile, Koneko flew into the wall from the impact of Haku's blow, and was knocked out.

"WINNER, HAKU!" Hidan yelled into his megaphone.

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"... That was really anticlimactic..." Jiraiya said.

"What are you gonna do?" Naruto asked Kiiro.

Kiiro blinked. "Umm... I don't know. I just wanted him to not get blasted by lightning for the second time in his life, that's all."

"Actually, that's only the first time in the life he's got right now," Aki said, approaching Kiiro and Naruto. "But still, I'm not surprised the raikiri would scare him like that."

"Death affects people in odd ways," Kiiro agreed. "Every time Kuro-chan pulls out a kunai, I get nervous. Oh, and I've started to see blood as amusing."

"... Is there anyone in these exams who _isn't _dead?" Naruto asked.

Aki nodded. "I'm not dead, Daidaiiro's not dead, Akaii's not dead, Sakura's not dead--"

"Sakura-chan's here?" Naruto gasped. He ran off in search of pink-haired women.

"Kuroppi's not dead, Chigatana's not dead, and I don't think the proctor is dead," Aki finished, "But I have heard stories that he might be. Gosh, that boy is rude."

"I'm beginning to see why people mistake me for him," Kiiro agreed.

Someone blew in Kiiro's ear.

"Eek!" Kiiro turned around to face the offender. "Who was-- Haku-kun!"

Haku smiled. "You said you were going to do something, if I won. What was it?"

Kiiro blushed. "I don't know... I... I just didn't want you to get lightning-blasted by Koneko-chan," she admitted. "Umm... but... I'll think of something. Or you could."

"I can think of something." Haku wrapped his arms around Kiiro's shoulders. "Close your eyes..."

"Okay..."

Kiiro closed her eyes, and Haku kissed her gently.

"Haku... kun..." Kiiro leaned against his chest, burying her face in his shirt. "Dammit, now I'm blushing..."

"You were blushing before I kissed you," Haku pointed out.

Kiiro made a face. "I was? That was probably from embarrassment, though. Now it's just because you kissed me."

Haku wrapped his arms around Kiiro in a hug. "Well... good to know."

Jiraiya, who was still there, started scribbling in a notebook furiously.

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"Sakura-chan! Sakura-chan! I didn't know you'd be--"

Naruto ran directly into Haruno Sakura's fist.

"I don't see you for a year, and you're still this annoying!" She smiled. "But it's good to see you. Sort of."

"Really?" Naruto grinned widely.

Sakura twitched. "I said, sort of."

"NEXT MATCH!" Hidan roared in the distance. "HARUNO SAKURA versus DOUBUTSUYAMA AKAII!"

"Well..." Sakura smiled awkwardly. "Guess I better go..."

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"Ah, Jiraiya-sama?" Kiiro looked at said ninja, who was still writing in his notebook. "You needed to talk to me about something, right? I don't really know either of the people fighting right now... so I won't be too put out if I don't catch this fight."

Jiraiya sighed. "But it concerns Naruto, too... and he'll want to watch Sakura's fight..."

"Oh, right..." Kiiro noted, "Naruzumaki and Saku-sempai are teammates! And their sensei is Hatakashi, and their other teammate is Uchihasuke..." she grinned. "Wow, suddenly I feel bad for the guy. Naruzumaki, that is."

"I don't think I blame you," Jiraiya chuckled.

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me: whew, I spent way too much time procrastinating with this! happy thanksgiving, everyone!


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